So saw Scott Pilgrim last night, it was pretty fantastic, made me nostalgic for the highschool/college days of living with friends and doing nothing. The crowd I saw it with was pretty chatty - no one had convos, but there was a lot of 'omg ya/he's so hot' from various girls when different guys came onscreen, and lots of 'WAT' and 'hahaha fuck yeah's.
Best part of the night though, was when they were playing the trailer for Devil. It's M. Night's newest movie, where the premise is 'there's five people trapped in an elevator, and one of them is the devil'
Yeah.
So the trailer's playing and the theater's like 'what the fuck is this', and then the screen goes 'FROM M. NIGHT. SHAMAYLAN' and everyone in the theater starts booing and groaning really loudly. Which causes everyone to start laughing and then the rest of the trailer up until the movie starts is just giggling and chittering over that amazing moment.

I was driving home over the Highway when I saw two Rakkens, one with it's head smashed and the other one basically cut in half trying DESPERATELY to drag the other one off the road with only his front half legs.

I backed up and finished the job, I only hope it hadn't been suffering too long before I finished it off.

>>265527

Mercy killing is still killing, you monster. How do you know they weren't rehearsing for a play for elderly rakken whose children don't visit them anymore?

>>265528
Uhh.......OH GOD YER RIGHT!

WHAT AM I BECOME?

>>265527
What is a Rakken?

  >>265531
4:17

>>265533
Oh.

So my man had to cancel on Scott Pilgrim, due to lack of funds. But he made up for it. And we're pretty much official now.

And I still got to see the movie with my ladybitch. AND IT WAS FUCKING AMAZING :D

  I am in the best mood ever right now.
I just woke up from a mid-afternoon nap, made an awesome grilled cheese sandwich, and sang this song while workin that spatula.

>>265539
You have a fag hag?! HAW

She might just be my faghag yes. Also we may run over an armadillo on the way home. But it lived what with the armor and all.

Why do my friends keep trying to set me up with women? Why is it so hot out? Why do I have to mow the lawn when I am allergic to grass?

Today is significantly less fantastic than yesterday :(

My brother wailed on me with the blunt end of a knife because I said he was too pussy to stab me and now my elbow hurts.

>>265550
1) To get you a woman
2) To get women scantily clad around you
3) Women like men who do yard work

>>265552
I think Miley is saying he wants well dressed men who like to do his yard work for him.

>>265553
Ooh! Ooh! I'll put on my church clothes!

>>265554
I just got giddy. :3

I hope you boys have a good time!

>Helpfully explaining the game mechanics of Persona 3 to someone on /v/ who doesn't get the game
>Post doesn't go through
>Refresh page
>Banned for spamming

I am not opposed to this. Whatever may come, the result is less yardwork for me.

Although ihi already did it and now I feel like death. But I get to look forward to the most expensive meal of my young life courtesy of my roommates parents in a few hours.

>telemarketer calls me.
>impersonate Ken Kaniff
>hit on him

What a fucking sport, he just took it. I should've.. refinanced my house or whatever just because he was a good sport about it.

>first day of Marymass
>friends, family, etc all away to the torch parade and fireworks/opening show
>hey tooth, do you want to come?
>shit no
>say at home, chill to Seeed, watch war films, eat brownies

>Trying to do laps in the community pool
>"If I move over here there's a lane"
>Kids swim into the gap
>"Okay, I'll move back over there"
>Kids swim back

And now I understand why adult swim exists.

So I've got about fifty pounds of free peaches, nectarines, and plums sitting in my kitchen.

Living in the Central Valley is awesome.

>>265580
>nectarines

brb robbing you

I am on plus4chan in a fancy restaurant. I am bringing this site to the upperclass.

>go looking for my old Wal*Mart gift card
>instead find a box of caramel cubes, my Lord of the Rings board game, and an expensive cigar

>>265580

Dude, are you in like, Fresno or something? We should meet up!

>>265582
More like to the guy who sweeps up your crumbs, amirite?
Enjoy your rich people feed.

>>265582
Noooo we'll never hear the end of how we're holding wine glasses wrong and using the wrong cutlery and argh

>>265543
>>Also we may run over an armadillo on the way home. But it lived what with the armor and all.
That's...that's not how it works.

>>265587

They have bad eyesight, and "pop up" or jump when scared. Good strategy when facing a coyote, bad strategy when a car is passing over you at 60mph.

>>265543
Dead, Very dead, Trust me.

>Brother gives my ex (who is his dealer) my number
>Ex texts me
>Witty banter/good natured flirting ensue
>We should meet up for that brunch date I missed last time.
>"Oh my , are you asking me out?"
>UUUUH I ALSO NEED A SKETCHBOOK REAL BAD BRO. BUDDY. FELLA. GUY.
>"Cool, meet you tomorrow at 11"
>YEAH. COOL.
>HIGHWAY TO THE DANGER ZONE

Hardly a week in and I am awkarding it up with both my ex-boyfriends.

Maybe I should ring up my ex-girlfriend and grope her just to make things nice and even.

In other news, Bucky is awful chompy lately, I look like I've "fell down the stairs"

>>265593
>my tits are a chewtoy
canada must have got some fucked up stairs, maya.

My dad got me new golf clubs! A whole fucking set! Lady's clubs! In my favorite color! Holy shit you guys!

>>265543
Here in Texas-land, the only armadillos you see are road-kill.

Why do you suppose Russians are so darn evil?

>>265642
Go to Russia, see what's there and then ask that question again.

  >>265642

The blocks.

So Jade had a huge bloated stomach. Being a bit of a worrywort, I fussed over her for about an hour until I decided to take her to the emerg vet. Where after two hours of waiting they finally checked on her, took xrays, and it turns out her stomach is full of air, but not in a life-threatening way. So, since there's no way she'd relax and get rest in the vetplace because of her anxiety, I've taken her home and now need to watch her for the next 5 or so hours to make sure she doesn't start puking or something.
$400 Red dolla's down for this. Just under what I have saved up for this sort of thing. If it had been a worse situation, it could've cost me up to a grand :/
Missed a party thanks to it too. Stupid dog why do I love her

i'm in idaho


FUCK IM STUCK IN IDAHO

>>265648

I...I'm sorry, Anonymous. Idaho is awful.



I just had the worst lamb chop ever in the universe.
It was disgustingly fatty with only a teeny tiny bit of meat that was impossible to saw off the bone, what the hell. I actually paid to eat this.

So, my Dog Abusing Area Adjacent Amigo told me to come on over and use his pool since it was hot today and he was going out to party and thought it would be a nice apology for all the legal battling we did that resulted in his ban from pet ownership, anyway I was in it relaxing when I started to feel to hot and kinda lulled to sleep in the heat, when I woke up the pool was starting boiling and the ladder broke off in my hands so I broke the side of the pool down and went home to sleep in a cool bath before I came to my senses and figured what was going on via phone call from a Friend at a bar where the guy was blabbing his big mouth out.
BLARGH, I can cross being boiled off my list of things I never wanted to have happen to me but did, on the bright side I can probably get the guy next door arrested for trying to murder me if it turns out the pool heater was tampered with and the bolt on the ladder was cut, also the testimony of the people he told that he'd killed me in an "accident."

Ambulance checked me out, little heat exhaustion but otherwise fine with a little burning, the town police are getting a warrant to investigate the pool area now so I'm gonna have a busy morning. I know this sounds kinda narcissistic, but I'm glad I'm okay.

>new plugs

>>265266
>Roger's Time Machine

I saw that place while walking to Soho last week.

>Watching "The Evil Dead" late at night with the color turned off

>>265651
hahaha what the hell
...seriously though, what the hell?

>>265657
Fucked If I know buddy, but I'm seriously tired so I'm gonna hit the sheets, Good night.

>>265651
I thought I mistakenly clicked on the dream thread for a second...

>>265712
No, you clicked on the "I'm a huge compulsive liar who has no way of substantiating any of the stories I tell people" thread