Well liars dice gets me SO drunk.

I actually missed you assholes.

Hi.

>Last day of college
>2 awkward hours of sleep.
>Need to give presentation I slapped together last night and turn in a portfolio that still needs to be compiled and turned in by 1:00.
This stress is unreal.

>>375046
I do missed all as well.
At least I could saw you at fb.

>>375054
Jazz!
Is been a while!
How have you been?
What have you been up to?

zup

I had no idea what the fuck to do with the extra time I had from not checking +4.

Thank goodness it's back up so I don't have to worry about that anymore.

Also, while we were down, I got a raise! And a $2K bonus! Yay!

I BOUGHT A POPOVER PAN.
And some other things, but mostly a popover pan.
God I love popovers.
>>375046
I actually missed you, too, Moe. And the other assholes too.

Welcome back, bitches.

>>375080
welp now i know what i'm going to be doing
not coming back to plus4chan

Ah, 504 Gateway Timeout, I missed even you.

>>375090
How that even happens?

>>375092
idk

Oh, hey, plus4 is back.

yay

i missed you guys so much, where did you guys spend your away time

I just listened to my entire Super Slam folder.

While you were gone, I discovered DUBSTEP

Finally.

>>had a fight with my then-best friend and their significant other about a year ago
>>it was a misunderstanding and I felt bad about it
>>they stopped talking to me
>>just starting to get over the guilt
>>find out today the two of them have become total assholes
>>one of them has actually become a violent drug addict who has gotten in trouble several times for their collection of kiddy porn

I think I have unintentionally made the right choice in not trying to talk to these two anymore. I still feel bad for the one who isn't a violent pedophile, though, she's really a whole "dedicated to you till the end, no matter what you do" type.

Meanwhile, me and my girlfriend are less outwardly affectionate and yet our relationship is much more healthy.

>try to do things while +4 is down
>lolno read moar faget
>spaz between various subjects/projects/dumbler
>nothing really gets done
>+4 is back

WELP. STRANGERS NEED TO KNOW ABOUT MY BRAIN PROBLEMS, NO MORE TIME TO DO ACTUAL WORK/research

>>375129

…The Rock…

oh good ninja somehow figured out to come back to plus4
are we still doing a literature reading group?

tbh talking science with a plus4chan user is the only reason i'm back here.

what is

WHAT

IS IT TRUE

>>375141
Oh ok so it's been back since thursday.

I had to go on regular 4chan for a while. It only made me miss this place more.

>>375139

For our first discussion: Fucks - What They Are, and How to not Give Any.

Discussant: pablo
Featured Speakers: anonex and whatever shit I'm busy

>>375143
whatever, man

>>375145
This concludes our discussion on Fucks. Our next discussion: The G-Spot: Myth or Conspiracy?

I have a strong fear of angering people. My mom and dad have threatened me and attempted to physically harm me for screwing up, as have some of my classmates (years and years ago, but still) and I live in fear of someone going after me for being annoying, or weird, or stupid. I apologize constantly and I get very shaky and prone to migraines. I don't want to live like this or constantly scrutinize what people say about me. This needs to stop.

I know anxiety meds would just make me sleepy, because I tried antidepressants before and that's what happened. I am seeing a psychologist but my parents come into the room too often to talk about the abuse.

The moodswings have gotten a lot worse, lately. Much more dramatic shifts, with smaller and smaller reasons for them.
Every time I think I should get tested or whatever it is they do for manic depression, I remember that that's one of those ~special snowflake~ problems people diagnose themselves with when really they're just sort of moody. Convince myself I'm just being a drama queen. Tell myself to quit being such a baby, remind myself I would hate having to take pills just to be able to get through a week without feeling like this. Just need to quit being so dramatic, right? They're mood swings. Everyone has them sometimes. Don't try and make it into some sort of disorder, Slowpoke.

I haven't had suicidal fantasies since I was pubescent, why are they coming back now?
At least back then people missed me in them. Now, once the grief fades, everyone's better without me.
Christ.

>>375146
Answer: Yes.

Tune in next week for the very long boring explanation for the one word answer followed by analysis from unqualified news casters.

>>375160
>once the grief fades, everyone's better without me.

Oh that's bullshit and you know it. I'll hazard a guess and say that in your pubescent suicidal phase you tried to tell yourself that people would be able to get over your death easily too. It's something depressed people tell themselves because it allows for guilt-free suicide fantasies.

Here's an idea, imagine telling the people you care about that you're feeling this way. I mean it, really think about how that would go. How do you think they'd react to hearing you're entertaining thoughts of suicide? I guess they'd react strongly enough for you to be afraid of telling them, otherwise you'd be talking to them about it instead of us. Now imagine them being in what is by far an even stronger state of emotional turmoil; that's how they'd really be if you offed yourself. Knowing someone who committed suicide isn't something your friends or family will just 'get over.'

Of course, you don't want to admit this to yourself, because acknowledging that there are people out there who care about you makes it more difficult to feel depressed.

You said you had suicidal thoughts when you were younger. Is that really something you want to let yourself go back to? I'll tell you right now, if you've crossed that threshold to being suicidal once in your life, then no matter how long you manage to stay out of depression you always run the risk of letting yourself back into it. Some bad shit will happen, or stress will build up, or you'll be in a really shitty mood for no particular reason, and those suicidal thoughts will come a knocking. You'll want to just let them in and feel like shit, but you have to stop yourself from even entertaining them. The moment the words "suicide", "kill myself" or "deserve to die" even appear in your head, you have to make a very conscious effort to just stop what you're thinking, tell yourself you don't really want this, and then drop it. Go ahead and feel bad, but don't ever let yourself take it too far. And the hard part is that on some level you probably will want to lapse back into that suicidal mindset, or stay in it, and ignoring that can often be a really hard thing to do. But it's just something you gotta do. Maybe after a while it'll get easier, but when shitty moods strike again it'll go back to being difficult, and you just have to tell yourself that you can't ever let yourself go back to being what you once were.

Remember that this is a consistent effort you have to put forth. Never let yourself say "I'll let these suicidal thoughts/fantasies slide this one time because I'm feeling really down." You can't even let them get their foot in the door, and if they already have, kick them the fuck out and never let them back in.

Or maybe I'm just projecting and none of this applies to you, in which case I typed up all this bullshit for nothing. Oh well.

>>375172
>Oh that's bullshit and you know it.
When I'm in a rational state of mind, I certainly do, but if I've slipped so far off that I'm thinking about it, it's hard to convince myself.

I have told my family about it. My mom didn't say anything, my sister started crying, but I think that was mostly cause I told her "we aren't even that close, it wouldn't hit you as hard as if we were like, best friends," which in retrospect was a very tactless and selfish thing to say. Haven't told my significant other or most of my friends though.

The rest of your post was very apt, though, I don't think you were projecting too hard, or, if you were, it didn't keep it from being helpful.
Thank you.

I like it when my boss is gone, it means I can fart in peace without worrying about her smelling it.

>>375184
What kind of mood swings are you having, anyhow? Any replicated sensations or changes so 180 that they make you stop and note?

>>375194
I'm not sure what you mean by replicated sensations, but
basically yes, I'm generally a very happy person, but at the drop of a hat, over such minor things, I'm instantly very melancholy, and it just gets worse as the day goes on, I very rarely cheer up on the same day I start feeling bad. Occasionally the sadness goes on for a few days, but usually I'm more or less back on top after I wake up the next day, even if I feel absolutely horrible when I fall asleep.
So yes, it's pretty much a complete 180 in both directions, and yes, I notice them when they happen, and wonder why I'm bothered as much as I am, but it just starts as a bad mood and within a few hours turns into...something considerably worse than just "a bad mood," I don't think I can stop the downward spiral once it starts.

I dunno if that's a coherent or detailed enough answer, but yeah, sorry.

>>375151
You should tell your psychologist you'd prefer to speak to them privately.
They will understand. They've seen this shit before.

"Cunt."

>White woman: *collapses in tears, her entire worldview shattered* "HOW CAN THE WORLD BE SO CRUEL?

>>375212
check your privilege you moe

>Friend gets a girlfriend
>Never hear from him again

I've a theory. Being raped by a Wayanes Brother removes any credibility one might ever have of being frightening or dangerous to people, ever again. Like some sort of psychological immunization to supernatural horror.
Scary Movie 2 clown

If Freddy Kreuger ever stepped into a Wayanes Bro. dream, he'd never taste fear from anything, ever.

Man, you know your family is shitty when the least horrible human being is the ex-Mafioso who had dealings with terrorists and is a confirmed wife beater.

I am being completely serious.

>>375225
Well, he sounds pretty cool except for the wife-beating part. Sucks, but, you can't choose your family. I am constantly baffled by the quality of the relatives of some people on here; How they can want so much, expect so little and just in general not be able to past their own noses is amazing, if unsurprising. It seems a miracle that some people made it here at all, sometimes.

>>375200
By "replicated sensations" I mean they were odd enough to take note and after a little experimenting you can actually induce the feelings again, usually by a set of external circumstances. If that's the case, taking steps to prevent those conditions is a very good move.

If it's just occurring on its' own with no real spark and just spiraling down because that's how you feel, that'd really be something more for an actual doctor to discuss. I can tell you that in such instances, being around people, especially in a public setting, can make it difficult for the negative emotions to take. But I might get a pro to give his opinion.

I say as I constantly put off calling a shrink for myself. On the one hand, I could use it. On the other hand, I don't like paying people money to tell me what's wrong with me.

>>375225
Well.....you know who to call if you need a guy whacked. There's always a bright side.

>>375227
>aw man I feel so depressed, I'm not even worth having around, I really just shouldn't have been born
>...I wonder if I can make myself feel like this more frequently, I should experiment
Truly, science is an odd field.

It's usually not occurring on its own, though, it has sources. Generally just things said by people I love. Not malicious things, not even necessarily mean things, just
things that set me off. Maybe they make me feel uncomfortable, and that leads me into thinking about what an unsociable chump I am, which spirals down until I'm just lying somewhere wishing I could quit life for a bit.
Things like that, I guess.
And I just don't like pills. Even ones that don't need to be taken regularly. I skipped out on post-surgery painkillers and just walked around feeling like I'd taken a hammer to the ribs for a week or so. I don't even take ibuprofen to break fevers until they get really dangerous, in the 103-104 range.
>>375236
I wish I'd kept in contact with the guy I knew who could get someone whacked if need be. He was a genuinely nice dude. Took me to see the first Spider-Man movie when it hit theaters because I was a little kid with no money and he could spare a bit.

>>375238
I know a guy, who knows a guy. The first guy being my old Wing Chun instructor.

At the end of one lesson he explained to us, in specific detail, how to dispose of a body.

Truly, bureaucracy is one of the worst things conceived by humanity.

>>375252

Actually the implementation of beaureaucracy has generally resulted in greater societal stability and continuity of service.

>>375252

Actually the implementation of beaureaucracy has generally resulted in greater societal stability and continuity of service.

>>375241
My guy is just my mom's old drug dealer. He worked with my sister and sold my mom pot for cheap cause they were bros. He was a great dude, but he had some pretty serious gang ties and I really do not doubt he knows someone that'd stab a dude for a couple hundred.

>am perfectly happy being single
>seriously don't want kids
>dad pushes for him to have grandkids
>love dad and don't want to let him die disappointed

what do

>>375266
Tell him you'll adopt if he pays for all expenses forever and also watches the kid all the time forever.

>>375257
"Democracy is the worst form of Government, except for all the other ones."

>>375238
For a second I didn't read it all and I thought you were talking about acquiring weed.

IDK I have an idiosyncratic relationship with pain. When I hurt, especially when I hurt in odd ways or with phantom pains, the very first thing I do is try and replicate the sensation and if I can, sustain it for a bit, under some kind of messed up notion of building strength by attempting to rip open my weaknesses.

BUT THAT'S MAYBE NOT THE SMART THING TO DO (or at least not done for smart reasons). But experimenting with your own pain, especially an internal, ethereal one, can lead you to greater understanding of what causes you to hurt and how to avoid/deal with it, even just recognizing it. It actually took me a while to understand that I really hated my first job, and that it made me depressed and was just such a dark mark on my life that I almost didn't see the pressure until it was relieved.

>>375257
Well yeah. The thing about bureaucracy is that it builds a paper trail for everything that happens--and a paper trail means accountability. As hard as it is to believe with the number of times we see corruption bubble to the surface, the bureaucracy actually prevents far more.

Plus, think of it this way: it's not the people are any more corrupt in the modern day than they were in the past. It's that the corrupt people are getting caught more often than they ever have.

>>375207
Thank you. I'll try my best.

Right now I'm trying to figure out how to do better on my artwork and possibly have a career. My parents (or at least, my dad) don't have faith in me, and I'm scared of never getting hired, or never having the skills to do so.

>>375283
Do you have a DeviantArt? Tried asking for feedback in /draw/ or (if you're the courageous type) 4chan's /ic/? Do you do commissions? You could always post a piece or two here and ask for feedback.

Getting good criticism, the type that will not only be painless but also have good pointers to what to improve, can be hard.

>>375285
I've posted on both dA and +4's /draw/. I don't go on "regular 4chan" at all, it's always been too busy for me to keep up with. So far, only one or two responses. A couple of requesters who never got back to me. No commissions, partially because my dad and I have been fighting over my ability to finally make money (I want to, he doesn't want me to), partially because the only interested parties want me to work for free and aren't interested otherwise. Sigh.

>>375293
If I could make a suggestion?

Work on building a brand. You definitely need to work on improving your art (no matter how good you are), but the most important thing in being able to make a career in art is your ability to be visible to people who will give you money.

A large part of that is going to mean that right now, while you're still learning to be a Great Artist, you give a lot away for free. Not necessarily requests and stuff--setting a precedent for doing commissions without being paid is probably a bad idea. But giving away art that you draw yourself, like comics or illustrated stories is a good idea. And stuff with an ongoing narrative (and thus a necessary buy-in) are better than random pin-ups.

Also, consider finding fandoms you enjoy enough to contribute to the body of fanart for that fandom. Fanart garners a lot of attention, and original stuff is slower to. Never let yourself fall into the trap of doing only fan stuff, especially when you notice that your original stuff never gets as much attention as your fan stuff early on and might start to feel depressed about your ability to form your own stuff, though. That's just the nature of Art on the Internets.

An artist on the Internet doesn't really sell Art, even if he or she is technically selling artifacts as a business. They sell themselves. You have to be a person that people want to be patrons of. And the most horrible part about that is that (if you're anything like me or most artists I've talked to), that's terrifying. It's putting yourself out there to be judged both as an artist and as a human being, and it really makes you feel vulnerable and scared. And that's why a lot of artists are so prickly and so bad about taking criticism. But you've got to overcome that, because people don't generally like people who lash out at them, unless those people are entertaining when they lash out or have developed enough reputation for a solid body of work that they can get away with alienating a few people.

Disclaimer: I haven't made art into a career yet, either. So take this stuff with a grain of salt. But these are the things I've picked up and gleaned on my path toward doing so, and who knows for certain if they're actually going to lead to where I want them to.

>trying to plan out my senior year
>have certain requirements left to fulfill for my majors
>both departments making it notoriously hard to fulfill the requirements without having an unbalanced schedule

>>375322
I know that feel, I'm basically doing the same thing (except mine is college required classes I haven't taken yet vs my major). I still need a science lab class that I wanted to take during my fall semester but there is no way whatsoever that I can since they all conflict with my senior seminar class which I need for my major. It's frustrating

You know what's hilarious?

Someone herping and derping about BOOTSTRAPS when he was handed an IT job right out of high school thanks to nepotism. One that is cushy enough for him to afford owning two houses in an expensive part of the country in his mid-20s. While disparaging hard-working college graduates who can't afford their own place because dude never had to deal with the recession.

I ain't even mad. (I'm a little mad.)

>>375338

Tell that nigga to check his privilege. For real. He should stop to think that being handed an IT job out of high school is incredibly lucky.

It drives me nuts when people don't realize how easy they have it. For the record, I do realize how easy I have it. I have parents and teachers who give a shit about my education and I have had them since I was in kindergarten. I also grew up middle class, whatever that's worth.

>>375338
I can do you one better.

>College students who complain about welfare while accepting financial aid.

>>375339
>Tell that nigga to check his privilege. For real.
Probably the best way to not get taken seriously by anyone.
I agree though, bitch needs to shut his face.

>>375342

Well, I expect his response to be more articulate than mine!

>>375341

Hey now, they earned that money (by...uh, doing something) and are going to put it to good use. Or something.

>>375338
>Two houses

I I work IT and I am incredibly lucky to rent with roommates. Fuck him, he has enough money to start generating more money.

>>375341
>people complaining about taxes and still using any kind of public goods

welcome to alabama! where that's all anyone ever does! Bitch about people on welfare while the entire state's electricity bill is subsidized by the government? You bet! (Thanks TVA for cheaper energy prices than nearly anywhere else in the country.) Don't forget old white men on medicare who whine about "black girls who have babies to get more welfare" and rich business owners bitching about taxes while paying their illegal immigrant employees next to nothing and getting away with it because who the hell would they complain to? They'll also complain about "The Mexicans" being lazy anyways! They spout ridiculous conspiracies about China and gun control because that's what Fox News told them and they must be right!

never come to this fucking place i hate it so much

>>375347
Yeah, even setting aside social safety net programs, it's crazy how some people are so up in arms any time people talk about government spending or taxes, despite the fact that they drive on government-provided roads and enjoy the protections of the police and fire departments every single day, and most likely only got their jobs because of government-provided education, or who bought their houses with government-funded First Time Home Owners programs, or enjoyed the effects of a government that prevents monopolies from forming among most industries (not that it couldn't do better in certain industries, either) thus keeping the costs of consumer goods competitive.

We should set up a system where you can elect to not pay taxes for a year in exchange for not being allowed to use any of those things or anything else that the government funds or maintains, and then double your taxes when you decide to start paying up again.

>>375347
I live in Mississippi, I feel you.

Uh oh, Pablo.

>>375361
Even though I wake up every day like that, as long as there's no photographic evidence then I'm golden

>>375362
Whatever you say, alky.

>>375293
You need a source of income independent of your father, if you are who I think you are.
I'm telling you. Deprivation is a form of control.

http://www.ae.com/web/browse/skinnyskinny.jsp?catId=cat6280060&_requestid=188798


WHAT THE FUCK

>>375368

>>375368
there is a time and a place for these
but it's not daytime and it's typically not outside

>>375368

Don't worry, these won't last long when people start to realize how much they chafe.

>>375384
>climb inside your butt and permanently stain

>>375368
>>375370
>>375384
>>375385
It's a joke ad. That's body paint.

>>375386
Spectacular.

When you start to plum the depths of American culture things in the present day begin to come into a much more logical focus.

Even if it's only because you understand why it's illogical.

>>375389
Exactly why I try and point rational people in the direction of the crazies and where they're getting their sub-tier Fox News propaganda stuff. So they have some idea of the nonsense that's becoming obfuscated history as the years go by.

Unlike newspapers or pamphlets or other physical texts or manifestos, a lot of rallying calls to insecure crazies are currently bastard digital prints. Things that can be deleted in an instance but still be used to convey messages to the crazies it rings true to.

I'm hoping we have people cataloging this shit for historical, documentary purposes, because in 20-30 years if they leave out the Birther stuff some history books are just going to feel incomplete for a lot of impressionable young people learning about the wacky history.

>>375390
That's the other thing, America seems to HATE HISTORY but fucking LOVES NOSTALGIA.

Like Birth Of The Nation was the first movie ever shown in the white house where Woodrow Wilsom, with tears in his eyes choked out "Our history can be rewritten."

Also the heaping pile of racism that is The Searchers is still regarded as one of the finest films ever made, kinda mind boggling.

>>375392
Because most people are more open-minded and not as uptight as you are.

>>375392
I thought it was because the Searchers was meant to be a deconstruction of the kinds of characters John Wayne played throughout his life. He shoots people in the back, he betrays his word, he scalps a Native American in the scene of kind of the penultimate hypocrisy. In the last scene, significantly, the door closes on John Wayne's back, signifying that though the family has returned to a state of bliss, John Wayne's character can never enter that sort of place, pretty much because he is actually kind of a murderous thug.

I'm not saying the overall movie could not be construed as racist in the sense that any movie dealing Native Americans during that time period will inevitably be racist. I've always thought of it as the cap to John Wayne's career.

>>375393
>Because most people are afraid of communism and Native Amercans

But no seriously, yeah it's a beautiful movie but it is far and away too filled with racism and anti-communist propaganda to be considered one of the greatest films ever made and that it is is a testament to how hard America denies it's own history while glorifying genocide with puffy eyed nostalgia.

>>375394
Oh for sure, what I'm trying to get at is that it is one of many films America uses it as a staple of culture while is filled with racism and that hurts America culturally, for instance most critics back away from pointing out that living with native Americans does not melt your brain and turn you into a feral child.

>>375396
Because that shouldn't need clarifying.

I really have no idea what you're arguing. Do you think Looney Tunes shouldn't be praised based on its racial stereotyping?

>>375398
No, because most of Looney Toons truly racist aspects are in banned episodes and aren't really something people go around proclaiming as the grandest thing in the world.

The closest to that would Porky in Wackyland which I would honestly have to watch again to say anything about.

It's just interesting to see what survives of racism and other ignorance in the modern world while at the same time being considered art.

>>375390

Anything that makes it to the internet exists for the rest of time. Don't worry about it.

HEY BUDDYPALBROS

SUUUUPPPP

Sup

>>375364
I'm sorry I keep ranting about my dad, Ram. I just can't get through to him verbally (he plays everything off as a joke or says I'm selfish for having my own opinions, that anything I rant about is a petty world's-smallest-violin moment), and I'm afraid about what he might do if I just go behind his back to do something anyways.

>>375413
I sympathize. I'm in a similar situation, remember?
But you have a means by which to make a little scratch. And with paypal these days, you could be pretending to just do your private computering stuff, doodle "whatever you want" and "share it with your friends."
If you had your own post office box you wouldn't even need to raise his suspicions if he got the mail, because all mail that comes specifically to you regarding your off-the-side job would be going to that PO Box. And if you have your own cell phone, it'd be even easier to maintain contact with the bank, and thus 'strange' phone calls won't even show up on your landline caller ID.

Unless we're talking he's controlling enough to check the numbers of who has been calling you on your phone, or worse, not permitting you to have a cell phone of your own.

>>375416
He pays my bill, and we haven't gotten to actually open a Paypal yet. If I want to do most things, they need to be run by him first.

It truely bums me out to see you in a similar situation, since you're such a nice, helpful guy. I wish you the best.

>>375391
>"Our history can be rewritten."

wow.

what the actual fuck does that mean.

>>375432
Robert Wuhl's Assume the Posit…

History is pop culture. We are taught, and in America, our curriculum is adjusted to reflect private interests. If we were to teach, for example, just how ineffective the Catholic Church has been at "stopping sin", and what tremendous hypocrites the church as an institution has been for nearly its' entire existence, we'd instantly deflate a significant portion of the right-wing power base in this country. Which the right-wing power base would not want, which is why they get their constituents to try and hamper science and advancement to "what they believe", which does not hold a candle to the whole of scientific thought.

Realistic and informed knowledge of history is often very much an "after the fact" notion when it comes to American Schooling.

>>375437

I don't even know what the hell you're trying to say. As someone who learned all about indulgences in the 9th grade, I'm pretty sure you're making some broad assumptions about American schools.

Today I saw Wicked and had cocktails. Today I became a true gay.