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Don't discuss in this thread, only upload.

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►	Anonymous 12/26/08(Fri)07:36 No. 914 File: 123030577348.jpg-(1.70MB, 336x492, elementsofstyle_anonib.jpg) Hmm, I think I'll take this opportunity to upload something. Also Knowredge >>169 It doesn't work

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ITT bad fanfic generator

http://kaction.com/badfanfiction/

>Your challenge is to write crossover fanfiction combining WALL-E and Samurai Pizza Cats. The story should use starting a band as a plot device!

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►	The Mass 01/05/09(Mon)09:12 No. 956 >Your challenge is to write crossover fanfiction combining Walker, Texas Ranger and Twilight Zone. The story should use alternate dimensions as a plot device!

►	Jonix !4p51uvrfZw 01/05/09(Mon)09:42 No. 957 >>954 Do it. DO IT NOW

►	Anonymous 01/08/09(Thu)16:08 No. 972 >Your challenge is to write crossover fanfiction combining Mythbusters and Spiderman. The story should use the apocalypse as a plot device!

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They moved confidently through the city streets, stepping to some invisible rhythm that shaped the streets themselves, allowing the three men unhindered passage despite the leather padding, the top hats, the canes. Outfits that would normally get you skinned alive in this part of town blended in perfectly. Except for Stefan Perch, with his glasses, and the small dove balanced on his finger; the last time someone had objected to Mister Perch's being anywhere in Improbable City, the only thing that was left was a vaguely human shaped stain. Cultured fingers calmly placed Doctor Dove on her preferred lounge cage and if anyone else had taken his glasses off and carefully wiped them clean on a monogrammed silk handkerchief, it might be said that they were stalling for time, buying a few seconds of peace before having to confront an unfortunate facet of reality. But when you were Stefan Perch, such an action was a mercy, allowing whatever fool reality dared to challenge his dominance of the immediate area a few more seconds of life. He's sent 20-year street beat veterans and trained government operatives cringing towards the door with a significant glance before...

On the other hand, there was something to be said for lost effort. "I have not seen the Professor, Mister Two-Vests." The temporal gangster explained calmly, sipping the hot apple cider his right hand man, the grim undertaker known to men as Mister Eugene Frankly, had prepared. "Frankly, I am offended at the implication. My organization's relationship with 'Badass' has always been strictly business in nature. I have no interest in upsetting his family. It is beneath me."

"That's not what I've heard." The shadow to Perch's immediate left hissed, a gloved hand placing itself on the time mobster's shoulder and starting to gently squeeze. "It'd be so easy, too. Prof's never bothered to hide his identity. One quick trip back in time, a jostled automobile...no one even really died. Miscarriages happen all the time, right? And all of a sudden, the Could Have Been Gang's greatest enemy...is not, anymore."

"Is she regretting coming to

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"Hey! Hey, Nurse! Nuuurse! Come on, let's battle!"

"Go 'way, Bones...I don't wanna...not today..."

"Aww, what's wrong, Nursey? Ya scaaared? Come on, let's battle!"

"I'm not scared. I just don't wanna. So nyeh."

"Hehehe...got your hat! Come on, come on! Come get it!"

"Bones, you jerk! Give it back! Right now!"

"Nope! It's my hat now! But I tell ya what! If you beat me, you can have it back!"

"Grrr...fine! Let's battle! Go, Blastoise!"

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►	Amazing 01/07/09(Wed)08:07 No. 967 >>961 >>962 Pron sappin' mah writefaggotry? Also, I'm not familiar with the song that Pidgeot is singing here, but a niggling voice in my head tells me it's sung by an Irishman.

►	Gentleman Bones !6w/VggIMPs 01/07/09(Wed)08:39 No. 968 >>967 I wouldn't know. Is Billy Joel Irish?

►	Dr. Nurse !PUL5IHCQus 01/07/09(Wed)20:21 No. 970 >>962 >>967 Sh-shut up, you guys! I don't like him like that at all! Stupid Bones.

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Just finished this. Holy fuck, I hope the last book will be even better.

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►	BAD END 12/24/08(Wed)07:41 No. 908 >>907 I noticed that, but I kept reading... But when you hit the blatant ERAGON, I AM YOUR BROTHER! (NOOOOOOOOOO!) in Eldest, that shit is just... bah.

►	Anonymous 12/24/08(Wed)14:13 No. 909 >>908 Seriously? Damn, glad I didnt read it now.

►	Anonymous 01/07/09(Wed)06:01 No. 965 Read some real books you faggot.

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More like this.
Heres how you play, take your favorite author (or any author really) and write your favorite comic (or any comic really) in their style.

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Dr. Genome 01/02/09(Fri)20:25 No. 946 >>944 Well, in an actual one-on-one FIGHT, Bats would win. Vetinari is quick and he knows his way with a blade, but he's not as young as he used to be. But if they were just meeting for the first time (let's say Batman snuck into his office and tries to give a "I'm going to take your whole operation down" speech), Havelock could provide a pretty good argument for leaving the city the way it is. I doubt Batman cares whether crime is organized or not, but he wouldn't be able to deny that Ankh Morpork really WORKS. Of course, if it was a fight AND Vetinari had the Watch on his side, things would be a lot different. I'm not sure if even Batman can go up against Detritus's Piecemaker unharmed.

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Rametarin !xLQK1kRAVA 01/04/09(Sun)06:53 No. 952 I don't have a favorite author. Though the last author I bothered with, wrote like this. Without further ado, Spider-Man as written by Terry Goodkind. [Spider-Man] "I must save the city from the Kingpin!" [Black Cat] "Hold, Spider-Man! I must teach you more about your powers!" [Spider-Man] "Noo! I love Mary-Jane! But I will be tortured by you if it'll make me powerful enough to save her!" Black Cat then tortures Spider-Man in exhaustive detail for another few chapters. Pantpant. How hot. BDSM BDSM BDSM. Etc. Totally not the author projecting masochistic D/s fantasies. Spider-Man then goes and vanquishes the Kingpin with a plot device! -the end-

►	Anonymous 01/06/09(Tue)01:43 No. 958 >>952 Then comes a long war against a communist nation where everyone is miserable! Fuck yeah, capitalism!

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All-purpose Twilight thread.


FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

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►	Gentleman Bones !6w/VggIMPs 12/31/08(Wed)16:15 No. 932 File: 123076895971.png-(18.89KB, 700x550, 1228645322941.png)

►	Anonymous 12/31/08(Wed)16:53 No. 933 >>928 URRRRRRRONK-RONK Tapirs are terrifying.

►	Dr. Genome 01/04/09(Sun)06:58 No. 953 http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/stephanie-meyer-letter.php I think you guys will like this.

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This is excellent horror, and will rejuvenate your perception on vampires.

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Writefag, here. You might know me from /co/ lately. I can't sleep, so I wrote some advice on writing, instead. Thoughts on it? Good advice? Bad advice? I'm so sleep derived I just wrote "I want to kill you" thousands of times? Clear? Unclear? Anyway:

Insomnia Masterpiece Theater

"Is this the right room for an argument?"
Agreement and scene flow.

This is some dialouge:
Cop: "Tell me where the bomb is!"
Terrorist: "No!"
Cop: "Tell me where the bomb is!"
Terrorist: "I don't want to!"
Cop: "Where is the bomb?!"
Terrorist: "I'm not saying."

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Yeah well, my first Fanfic/Fapfic. English is not my native language, so just look over the few grammatical mistakes. Comments/Reviews are appreciated.



He had found her. And now she was in his home. She was unconscious at first, when she woke up, she demanded some water and went back to sleep. Who was he to argue with a Mithra?
He had found her at the edge of Valnia forest only a few hundred yards away from his hut. When he found the catgirl she didn't seem to be injured, just extremely tired. She must have laid there for a few hours at least. Winter is definitely not the season to take a nap outside. Oh how how lucky she was. Oh how lucky HE was.
The catgirl looked georgeous, altough he had no idea how old she was. Silky white hair, the head crowned with the cutest cat-ears, her athletic body clad in the standard Mithran battle armor. As she lay at the fireplace, sleeping peacefully he couldn't help but stare. Her bosom was marvellous, altough her breasts were small, they looked perky. Oh how he wished to touch them. But not only her breasts caught his eyes, for he had a special desire.

Her feet.

She wore the Mithra sandals that came with the armor so he could take a good look at her toes. They were beautiful, like the rest of her. Long and slender, at their ends sharp claws that made them look even sexier. He wondered how her soles would look like, taste like, but he couldn't make a move on her. She would kill him for sure, if she awoke. The desire he felt was unbearable, the chance to suck delicious Mithran toes right in front him, and he didn't have the balls to take it. Or had he?
He stood up from his chair and moved slowly towards her. Mithras are predators after all, it was likely she didn't have a deep sleep. He closed the distance between him and her sleeping form. She didn't wake up. He kneeled at her feet, watching her face very intensely. If she was aware of his presence, she at least didn't show it. She lay as quiet as ever. He moved his head slowly forward, directly in direction of her wonderful toes. Never taking her face out of his gaze, he positioned himself so that he could reach her toes with his face without

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►	Anonymous 12/27/08(Sat)18:21 No. 918 >>915 Patience, /writ/ is a slow board.

►	Anonymous 12/28/08(Sun)17:36 No. 920 I came. That's really all I can say.

►	Gentleman Bones !6w/VggIMPs 12/28/08(Sun)17:38 No. 921 >>920 Such is the best compliment you can give a writer of porn.

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What are the last books you got yourself? I just went to a book sale, got:
Mucha artbook
Anatomy for the artist
Brothers Grimm's fairy tales
The loved dead & The whisperer in darkness by Lovecraft
Nocturnes by John Connolly
and Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrel, which by some strange reason is signed by the author, Susanna Clarke.

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►	Anonymous 12/23/08(Tue)15:38 No. 903 Bought Brisingr a week ago and just finished it. I fucking love this series and hope the finale is satisfying.

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Crushling 12/25/08(Thu)15:01 No. 912 File: 123024608672.jpg-(34.19KB, 342x500, schiele-selfportrait.jpg) A Schiele art book and the last two Dresden File books that I hadn't read. Those things are like crack to me. Pic related: I love this dude's style. Christmas gift cards probably mean I'm going to grab the James Jean cover art book too.

►	Ap 12/25/08(Thu)22:44 No. 913 Burning in Water, Drowning in Fire by Charles Bukowski

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Or Power Seeker: I Want My Mummy!


Prologue.
Today was not a good day for the man named Santa Louis Epoch. In fact he figured this to be in his top 20 worst days ever. It ranked somewhere between realizing he'd never get super powers like his family and realizing his family consisted of nothing be the worst criminals on the planet.

Santa Louis felt the ropes tearing though his the skin on his wrist. "These aren't breaking soon." He was tied down in a jail cell. He had been pretending to be dead since he and his exploration team were captured by the natives of the land.

Santa Louis opened his he eye to survey the room. The first thing he saw was the smiling faces of his crew. He stifled a screaming when he realized they didn't have bodies to go with them. He saw his captives chowing down on what looked to be someone's torso.

"Time to get out of here," he thought to himself. "now if only I new how to do that..." He was felt a little relived though. The cannibals were still eating the member of his team so he had plenty of time to figure that out.

"BLAH!" one of the natives shouted. He turned to his comrades and spoke only a hand full of people outside of this tribe had ever heard and even fewer understood. Fortunately or Unfortunately Santa Louis was fluent in the language.

"This one is all fat. Lets cut up the dead one." Santa Louis decided then an there that today was a worst day ever contender.

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(I started writing a Road Trip! One Piece fanfic for the fine folks over at /jam/ and it's getting posted here. It's not done, a'durr, but hey. If I post chunks of a fic, I'm more likely to finish it.)

"What the hell are you doing?" The voice that posed this oh-so-important question was completely deadpan.

"Road trip," he replied simply, like he was going to the store. His brother leaned over the railing of their back porch, at the dirty jeep his sibling had bought for five hundred dollars when he was fifteen.

It was an ugly, brown thing, older than its owner, with a cartoon sheep's head stuck to the antenna-- a joke that just sort of stuck after the years. It was missing its passenger side rearview mirror, the driver's side interior handle, and a functioning air conditioner. The paint was scratched and chipped and mismatched (all attempts by his idiot brother and his friends to hide the fact that the jeep was such a heap of garbage). The tires were different sizes. It was a miracle that the thing even ran.

More insane was how much his brother loved the stupid thing.

“A road trip? When did you decide this?”

“Last night. I got nothin’ better to do and still got some money saved up from work this summer,” he replied with a titter of laughter, like he’s planning something even as he tries to clean the taco wrappers out of the back seat.

“Where are you road tripping too?”

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►	Dr. Genome 12/20/08(Sat)18:50 No. 890 MOAR! M is for Money, which I would gladly pay. A is for Awesome, an appropriate description of this thing. O is for One Piece, of which there is not enough good fanfiction. R is for wRitefag, please hurry up!

►	Dr. Nurse !!MvMTIxAmEw 12/20/08(Sat)19:07 No. 892 >>890 Moar's coming in a few days. Shenanigans and heart warming will ensue.

►	Gentleman Bones !6w/VggIMPs 12/20/08(Sat)20:05 No. 893 Oh lord, I'm loving this. I'm not even a big One Piece fan. But this is great. I gotta say, Nurse. You're pretty talented.