Professor of Pokémon? What?

What exactly does a professor of Pokémon do?

Me? Some people call me Broseph McAwesomecool, but you can refer to me as...

I thiiiink we're probably doing too many lps at the same time.

Uh DUUUURRRRRR

>>6835
I DON'T CARE

I'M BORED

Also, who the hell is this guy, I don't know him. He looks like a Jerk.

Well I guess since you want me to name your grandchild for you, I can't exactly say no...

Alright, god damn finally.

Time to go adventuring!

...But first...

Fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine

YOU'RE NOT ANONYMOUS

YOU'RE NOT ANONYMOUS AT ALL

Shoulda played TCG instead.

Don't worry mah, I'm just going to go bum around Kanto for a few years experimenting with Pokéblocks.

I'll be back unemployed, living in your attic before you even know it!

>>6843
You could fill an entire thread doing one match in the TGC.

Besides! It's a nice day! It's time to go adventuring.

Hmm.. never noticed how small Pallet Town is. How the hell do all these people live here when there are only like 3 buildings?

Now let's go explo--

Oh god wait what

WHO IS YELLING AT ME

Oh god it's this old man.

Where the hell is he taking me?

ohh man, I've seen this before. It's just like that Chris Hansen guy.

Pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

Totally worth it.

What is the old man rambling about anyways?

You know what? Fuck this I'm just going to take my pokémon and start adventuring!

Hell yes, Charmander!

Wait.. wait what the fuck? THAT ISN'T WHAT I PICKED AT ALL, I HAVE BEEN LIED TOO.

That's a Pikachu alright.. Old man ripped me off!

Yup just a normal old Pikach--

...
...

since when does pikachu have a beak?

You know what? This is getting strange. I'm getting out of here before anything else happens.

Oh goddammit not now!

WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BULLY ME SO MUCH? IT'S NOT MY FAULT YOUR PARENTS HATED YOU AND GAVE YOU A STUPID NAME!

Oh wait, yes it is. lol.

Oh I see how it is. I get the stupid mouse and he gets the one he actually wanted.

Thanks a lot old jackass.

>2 turns
>Faints
You didn't pick the wrong pokémon, I just styled all over you.

Okay now let's try this again. ADVENTURE!

>Several minutes of traversing a linear path to the north

This is the first time I've been this far away from my Mom's attic.

I'm scared.

Oh god someone got murdered.

I've never seen a dead body before. I hate the big city!

Oh.

Wait, old people die when they don't have coffee?

Fine. I'll get him his stupid coffee so he'll get off of the stupid ground and get out of my stupid way so I can go to the stupid gym and get a stupid badge so I can become a stupid master of stupid pokémon.


....stupid..

>Hey are you from Pallet town?
No.
>Do you know professor Oak?
No.
>Will you take this package to him for me?
No.
>Thanks.
Fuck you.

I AM NOT YOUR ERRAND BOY

>Several minutes of pidgeys and backtracking later
I better get something out of all this crap.

Yes, you do!

Man this is never going to get old.

So let me get this straight, you want to give an electronic encyclopedia to a couple of 10 year old kids so that they can go out and do your work for you for free?

Nice one bro.

Alright, let's try this again.

ADVENTURE!

Time to catch some GODDOM POKEMANS

Finally. My real adventure can begin.

This place looks promising...

OH MAN WHAT THE HELL I'M FREAKING OUT

Huh, that actually isn't so bad.

Oh hey, it's whatever the hell this is.

oh shit that was close.

And now, the moment of truth..

TO BE CONTINUED.

WILL RED CATCH THE WILD BULBASUAR?
WILL I SUCK EVER STOP SUCKING?
WILL ANYTHING INTERESTING HAPPEN AT ALL?
TUNE IN GLANCE AT THIS THREAD WHILE SCROLLING DOWN THE PAGE NEXT TIME TO FIND OUT

>>6835
Two is too many?

This is very wrong...I'm concerned.

THE WORLD IS BURNING.
RUN.

>>6873
>Two
Your counting skills leave much to be desired.

I love you RED Anonymous.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

>6 Pokéballs later
GOD DAMN FINALLY

>Several minutes of grinding and capturing later
Fuck yes, look at this team.

Fuck yeah. I am going to be a Pokémon master in no time!

First stop, Viridian city gym!

GOD DAMMIT

You know what? Fuck this. Fuck stupid gyms. I don't need them.

I'm just going to go to the Pokémon league right now!

YOU READY WORLD? HERE COMES RED!

...

...

...

You suck.

Ha, only two pokémon? YOU ARE SMALL TIME!

Pidgey? More like sucky stupid bird face. Amirite?

YEAH

YEAH

WHAT NOW, HUH?

WHAT NOW?

BULBASAUR VS. SQUIRTLE
TACKLE ONLY
FINAL DESTINATION

Don't look at me like that..

You would do the same thing!

;_;

Holy shit that is one badass squirtle.

WHAT'S THAT?

I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF HOW MUCH YOU SUCK!

Lololol u mad.

...

Oh hey it's the dead dude again.

Hey thanks!

Why yes, it sure is!

Yes, yes I do. I have these four pokémon, see?

Oh that's okay, I know how. Thanks for the offer though. Maybe some other ti--

Oh god dammit.

GOD DAMMIT

I WILL MURDER YOU OLD MAN

Jesus Christ you are so god damn old.

DON'T BREAK YOUR ARM THROWING THAT BALL OLD MAN

How the shit did you do that? You didn't even punch it first or anything.

Man that old man was creepy. Gotta get out of this screwed up town.

Teehee~

And once again, it's time.

FOR ADVENTURE!

TO BE CONTINUED

Rom hacks are weird.