Do it faggot.jpg

This sounds like the best idea ever.

once I had some kind of Indian garlic red sauce and I decided to fry some canned tuna in it and eat it in a salad. I took one bite and the ghostly hand of Justin Wilson reached out through the veil of the afterlife to slap me across the face. I sobbed openly for several minutes. Even then I knew the sting of his clubbed finger tips across my cheek was the mark of a curse.
Later that night as the great grandfather clock in the foyer chimed the witching hour and I lay restless upon my bed, I felt a hot breath upon my neck. The scent of cooking sherry and grave dust filled my nostrils. Though I could not see her I heard her drunk semi slurred speech and knew the wraith of Julia Child was upon me. She whispered terrible things in my ear. Things I dare not repeat. Words, phrases, names and deeds impossible to speak with a living tongue. It was a that moment I knew the true gravity of what I had wrought. My actions, naive though they were, had offended the deepest love of these souls. I had wronged the notion of cooking its self. I begged for their forgiveness but my realization was too late. I cannot uncook a meal no more than I can unhear the things that hunched hag spat into my head.

I would eat that. It sounds delicious.

Since this actually the best ideas thread: Nutella oatmeal.