I'm having a hard time trying to talk to a friend of mine about something.When she's drunk she will talk about how she is inferior to men, and that she should just stay home, cook, and have babies.She will act really outgoing and friendly, but it seems to me she acts that way because she doesn't want to be alone. She's told me before that she would hate it if she walked into lunch and she knew nobody there.Going back to the drinking, she gets completely wasted on Fridays and the weekend, though she said she would stop drinking on school nights. But, when she is drunk I'll watch after her, because she is like a little kid. She tells me not to bother and she'll be fine, but honestly she can't even stand up without falling over. I think she doesn't want to bother me, thinking it will push me away.When it comes to classes at school she says she can't do anything, except foreign languages. But, in truth she is probably smarter than me on a lot of subjects.While I tend to be perceptive when it comes to things, I tend to over analyze them. So, I'm not sure if i should bring this up or how to bring it up. She seems so happy and cheerful, always smiling, whenever I have the chance to talk about this.I always get helpful advice here, so thank you in advance.::picture unrelated::
Your friend needs a therapist. She has issues. Major self-esteem issues.
Bitch has extreme self-esteem issues.If you get her talking she'll sob, she needs someone she can tell all this crap to.Then maybe she can work something out.Do you want to be that person?
>>274328>>274320I just don't know whether I'm imagining it or not. Most of the time she seems happy, and only occasionally has she said stuff like this.
Try getting her just a little tipsy before you start talking. Just enough to get her open up a bit more, feel those feelings before it gets too far and she's just wasted. Just a little bit of alcohol can help open up the mind and the heart, weaken judgment just enough for them to say things one would never reveal sober. Later you can talk to her when she's completely sober, and if she tries to act like she didn't mean/remember what she said, you know better and she'll know you know better.Just make sure you're ready and willing to be the person she spills it out to, because this girl is gonna have lots to say. Sounds like she's got huge issues.
It sounds like she has more than one issue and logical inconsistency that is preventing her from living up to her potential.Firstly you should try and dissuade her from drinking so much. With mutual friends in a less formal, less phony intervention if possible. Getting wasted is fun and all that, but all she's doing is shoveling her money down the drain, as well as hurting her body and her grades. And putting off facing her problems.Next, I'm not really sure how to advise on the whole "maybe I should just be a home maker" problem. A lot of women feel that way, even if the basis for those feelings is illogical or in many cases absurd. I guess the best I could council is try to get her to concentrate on success for the sake of personal success and to not measure herself against people by their sex. Of course men will often dominate everything; because the otherwise smart bitches that could fill their spots easily second guess themselves and conform to what they think is expected of them. If she chooses to see her gender as a handicap, advise row row fight the power.I can't offer any opinion on the whole social thing. I've never been a very social person. I've watched folks with a dependency on other people tear themselves apart when they couldn't get their fix. I'd like to say supplant her need for alcohol with social contact, but that might cause more dependency.That's my 2 cents.
Now I'm remembering back when I had low self-esteem...God times.
>>274344Next, I'm not really sure how to advise on the whole "maybe I should just be a home maker" problem. A lot of women feel that way-------------------------------------------The thing is the only time I've heard her say anything like that, about being inferior to men. Normally she is extremely dominant and capable.
>>274548I have no idea, Anonymous. People are complicated, female people especially so.