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No. 36985
We're back!
Also I wrote a thing.
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“Ugh, my head. Where am I?”
/tg/ rubbed his head and pushed his long hair out of his eyes. He sat up in bed and looked around. He was in an empty room, without windows. The only light source was a lamp fixture on the ceiling in the center of the room, which was turned on, for some reason. There was a desk with a computer and the bed that he was in. The walls were completely bare. The only obvious exit was a door.
/tg/ pulled the blue covers off himself, and realized he was wearing jeans and a red shirt with a clearly angry yellow frowny face. He got out of bed and cautiously opened the door. It opened into a large dark room illuminated only by the light of a television. The middle of the room was crowded with couches, and a solitary figure was sitting on one of them, intently looking at a TV with a videogame controller in his hand. /tg/ stepped out into the room, and closed the door behind him. It had a nameplate on it: “/tg/ - Traditional Games.” /tg/ guessed that meant him. Aside from gunshots and explosions from the TV there was no noise. The figure there didn't seem to notice him.
Looking around, /tg/ saw two spiral staircases going up as well as a number of other rooms on the floor. He moved silently upstairs, wishing for a sword or hammer to ward off any monster that might appear. The spiral staircase continued upwards, but this seemed to be the ground floor. The floor above had the same basic layout, but no couches or televisions. Orange light filtered through the curtains that opened onto the ground level of some sort of suburban street. It was clearly early morning. There was an exit to what seemed to be a yard, through a revolving door. There were doors to rooms on this floor as well. /tg/ looked around at the nameplates: “/e/ - Ecchi,” “/t/ - Torrents,” “/a/ - Anime and Manga,” “/b/ - Random.” Before he could get a better look, a man in a blue suit, fedora, and mask walked through the revolving doors, stretching and yawning. There was a slight pause as each eyed the other. /tg/ opened his mouth, but the masked man turned and fled upstairs before /tg/ could say anything.
“Looks like I failed that initiative roll...”
/tg/ stepped outside through the revolving doors, and breathed in the morning air. It was chilly, but /tg/ looked at the front of the four story building before going back inside. There was a sign hanging above the revolving door, that was just readable in the morning light: “4chan.” /tg/ walked inside and was greeted by a man with dirty blond hair and a Green Lantern hoodie.
“So, you must be new here,” he said, extending his arm for a handshake and taking a few breaths before continuing. “I'm /co/, welcome to 4chan.”
/tg/ reached up for a handshake. “Uh, hi, I'm /tg/, I think,” /tg/ trailed off.
“Well, don't worry, you'll find that this isn't too bad a place once you get used to it,” /co/ said, shaking hands.
“So, I guess I live here now?”
“Yep, welcome to the gang,” /co/ said, letting go. Most everyone is sleeping now, but you'll meet them soon enough.”
“ I don't really know how I got here.”
“None of us do, that's the great mystery of life!” /co/ said, slightly dramatically. “Where are you staying?”
“My room is downstairs, or so I've gathered.”
“Well, you can take some time to get settled in,” /co/ said. “I'll get /ck/ to cook you a nice breakfast. She should be getting up soon.” /co/ looked off into the distance, as /tg/ stared at /co/. “Oh, that's right,” /co/ continued, looking at his wrist watch. “The dining room is just upstairs. Breakfast will be ready in half an hour.”
“Thanks,” /tg/ said hesitantly.
“Don't worry about it!” /co/ said, smiling. “This is your home now, too! We'll be seeing lots of each other, I'm sure of it.” /co/ turned to go back upstairs, then paused, turned around and walked up closer to /tg/. “Oh,” he said, in a quieter voice, “everyone here is a bit of a character. Don't worry if you don't get along at first, just don't be too provocative.”
“I'll keep that in mind,” /tg/ said, wondering if this man had good intentions in mind or not. “Thanks, /co/.”
“See you in half an hour!” /co/ said and bounded upstairs.
/tg/ heard a loud “GODDAMNIT” from downstairs. He went back down, but nothing had changed. It must have been the guy with the controller. /tg/ snuck back into his room, and closed the door. So this was his new home? He didn't have much time to reflect on that, as he realized he wasn't alone in his room. On his bed, with on leg on the ground and one on the bed was what looked like a teenager with a scowl on his face. He was wearing torn jeans with chains on them, and a black t-shirt. A shadow seemed to emanate from him, making him look more sinister. There was a case at his feet.
“Hey,” he said, not waiting. “You like Warhammer, right?”
“Yeah,” /tg/ said, not sure how this person knew what he himself just realized.
“Here, you can have these,” the boy picked up the case, slightly carelessly, plopped it on the bed, and opened it up. /tg/ inched closer to look at it. Inside were Space Marines. The Marines were painted black, with green helms with something written on them in white: “No Picture Available.” There was a common motif of a snake-like white cat, and a four-leaf clover. One of the space marines had no helmet, and was wearing a red bandana on his head. Another had a black afro, and a third had a silly grin on his face and a T-rex on his chest plate. The attention to detail was impeccable. As /tg/ was admiring the minis, he didn't notice the boy stand up and slowly walk to the door.
/tg/ heard the door open, and looked at the back of the figure standing in the doorway. “Wait, did you paint these? And you're just giving them to me?” The minis looked like a labor of love.
“Yeah, you can have them,” the boy said, standing in the doorway, not looking back.
“Are you sure? This is a great paint job...”
The boy stepped through the door. “I don't want them anymore.”
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