A young man stands in his bedroom. It just so happens that today, the 15th of September, is this young man's birthday. Though it was fifteen years ago he was given life, it is only today he will be given a name! What will the name of this young man be?
Wayne!
Wayne it is! There is another young man that will make numerous appearances throughout this story.
What is this young man's name?
>>12711Kent.
>>12712...OH!HAH! That's clever!
The boy has cleverly been named Kent. Now that the formalities are out of the way, let's get this started!
No one was left who could remember how it had happened, how the world had fallen under darkness. At least no one who would do anything. No one who would oppose the dragons. No one who would challenge their power, or so Lance believed...
Hidden in the forests of Kanto, Professor Oak lived in a run-down tenement.An eccentric and brilliant man. Oak was a loner, a thinker, a man of ideas. Ideas forbidden in Lance's society. The society for which he worked. The society in which he lived. The society that he would set free.And so Oak worked, far into the night, when the watchful eyes of Lance’s dragons weren't upon him. He'd set his skillful hands to the task of creating Pokemon to bring about a change, to genetically alter a team to bring freedom, to create three ‘mons to save the world.Twelve years Oak worked and on a cold morning in the year 200X, Squirtle, Charmander, and Bulbasaur were born
A perfect trio, unbeatable machines, hell-bent on destroying every evil standing between man and freedom, built for one purpose, to destroy Lance's army of evil Trainers. Ready, willing, prepared to fightTHIS IS POKEMON FIRE RED: NUZLOCKE EDITION!
My name is Wayne. And for years now, the world of Pokemon Battles has been corrupted into a bloodthirsty struggle for survival. The current Champion, Lance, reigns supreme over all, simply because he has the strongest team out there. I'm quite frankly sick of it all, and I've been planning to DO something about it for a while. And today, my fifteenth birthday, I put my plan into action.
I am going to LEAVE PALLET TOWN FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE!
"The eccentric and brilliant loner in that run-down tenement?"Mom: The very same!"Well he can hold his damn horses, I've got better things to do!"
Things like escaping! What could possibly stop me now?!
Well, those could stop me I guess...Oak: You weren't really planning on leaving without saying goodbye, were you?"Uh, that was kind of the idea. You smell like oil and... I think that's blood."Oak: It is! Quickly, come with me!
Kent: Also, when am I going to meet my real parents?Oak: Shut up for five Goddamn minutes already and listen to what I have to say. It's important, and it very well may change your lives. Both of you.
Oak: I have spent the better part of 12 years genetically altering these three Pokemon, rebuilding them to be the perfect warriors."May I ask why?"Oak: Lance. You see, long ago, before you were born, Pokemon were used for carefree battles, with nothing to lose. It was fun, simple, and happy. Then Lance rose into power and changed all of that. It's time to bring back the peace, and I have chosen you two to do it. Take down Lance, establish a new world order!Kent: You mean... I get my own super-Pokemon?! Fuck yeah, bitches!"Wait, so you picked the two of us to go on your crusade? So why did you make three Pokemon?"Oak: ..."..."Oak: Because...
Oak: Just... shut up and choose your damn ball."Okay, jeeze! Touchy, touchy...">Alright, which Pokemon do I want?
>>12726Squirtle.
Oak: You want the turtle Pokemon?"Uhh... Hmm, for some reason, I get the feeling that choosing this one would be really unoriginal."
>>12727And name him Curry.
>>12727CHARMANDER
>>12730>>12731PICK THE CHARMANDER. NAME HIM CURRY. SPICY CURRY HAHA IT IS JOKE JUST PICK IT DO IT
"HOLY SHIT, THIS ONE'S ON FIRE! HAHA, YES! NOW WE'RE TALKING!"Oak: Charmander is probably the most difficult one to raise, it has quite the dangerous temper and shouldn't-"I'M TAKING THE FIRE LIZARD!"
"Oooh, we get to name 'em too?! Awesome..."
>>12734Name him Jason!
>>12736Raymond.
>>12736Marty.Then when he becomes Charizard change it to McFly.
"Haha. Curry. I am clever."
>>12738Or Stein.
"Pfft. Enjoy your lameass turtle, bitch."Kent: The fuck you say to me?
In b4 Awkward Zombie repeat.
"What, you seriously wanna do this? You're just a pussy, dude."Kent: How about I slap your shit?"How about I light up your night?"
"You ain't got shit on me."Kent: You'll know I won when your Pokemon's dead at your feet.
IF YOU LOSE THIS FIGHT, I SWEAR TO GOD, DUDE...
"Aaaaaaand I think I just won."Kent: Wha- NO, I SAID TACKLE, YOU FAT LITTLE BASTARD!
"Dude, you are fucking TERRIBLE at this shit."
Kent: Well? What are you waiting for? Finish it!"No."Kent: What?! You're showing mercy!?"Of course. BECAUSE THAT.IS HOW.I ROLL."
Kent: You're too soft, Wayne! You're just a big pussy! PUSSY!"Oh, run on home and tend to your wounded Pokemon already."Kent: Fine! I will! And mark my words, I will shadow your ass until the ends of the Earth until I have my revenge."Dude? Little gay."
"Alright, Curry. You ready to do this shit?"Curry: I was built ready."Oh hey. You talk."Curry: Duh, what kind of Pokemon LP doesn't have talking Pokemon?
"Oh sweet, a wild Pokemon! I can catch he- FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFU-"Curry: Just leave it to me, boss...(Hey, does this count as the first Pokemon in the area?)
>>12754No. That rule starts when you get the Pokeballs.
>>12755(Oh thank God)"Y'know, for all that talk about how dangerous the world has become, it's... really not all that bad out here."Curry: Nothin' but pigeons and rats as far as the eye can see."Maybe this'll be easier than I thought!"
Curry: Hell yeah, let's light some fires!"Yeah, but your performance in that battle could've used some work.Curry: Shut the fuck up!
"Our first stop! Viridian City! It's... less impressive than I thought it would be."Curry: We should stock up while we're here.
"POKEBALLS. POTIONS. ANTIDOTES. ALL OF THEM, NOOOOOWWWW!!"Clerk: Hold on a second there, Spazzy! I need you to make a delivery back in Pallet Town!"What?! Why me?!"Clerk: You're the only one who knows where it is."It's... literally.. a two minute walk SOUTH. You can't miss it."Clerk: Great! Come on back once you're finished!"Rrrrrrrrgh..."
"This is so fucking retarded..."Curry: Hey, at least I'll get more battle experience in.
"Just take your stupid package so I can get on my way already!"Oak: Oooh, I wonder what it could be! Let's find out together!"I hate you, old man..."
"Oh goodie, it's you again! How's your lameass Squirtle doing?"Kent: He's getting stronger by the second, actually."Great! Well! I'll be off now!"
"OH MY GOD, WHAT?"Curry: Calm the fuck down, boss. Lance ain't going anywhere.
Oak: This Pokedex will be helpful in cataloging all of the Pokemon in the Kanto region."Okay, how will this help me defeat Lance?"Oak: It... really won't. Look, the thing is, I had to get funding for those Pokemon from somewhere, alright? So I bullshitted around about a portable Wikipedia for Pokemon. Just... catch some and write whatever you want in there, it doesn't matter.
"You are a bad scientist."Oak: You do what you can to get money in this world. Even if it means stealing it from small children. Which you will probably end up doing.
"RIGHT! I take it all back! You're fuckin' awesome, Oak!"Kent: Don't I get any?Oak: You're still here?
"Well, Curry? Let's build an army."Curry: Gotcha. I'll... try to hold back on the poor critter.
AND OUR FIRST NEW POSSIBLE TEAMMATE IS...
PIDGEY!"Don't screw this up!"Curry: Uh. No promises.
Wayne held DOWN + B!
"YEEEEEEESSSSSS!!"
Name him Delta or Airman.
Airman joined the party!
>Level 4"GOD DAMN IT"
"Alright! Finally, back in Viridian!"Curry: Items"TO THE POKEMART!"
Spending every last cent, we can't afford to do otherwise.
>>12776Wait, what rules are we setting up for this Nuzlocke run?Just vanilla "They faint, they die permanently?"
>>12778Standard Nuzlocke rules from what I can tell. Fainting means you died, first pokemon in an area and only that pokemon, unless it's a duplicate and in that case, you can hunt for another?
>>12779(The way I'm going to play it is, if it's a duplicate, then it still counts. I'll just have two Rattatas or Pidgeys or whatever it happens to be)"Uhhh, I know how to catch Pokemon."Old Man: Nonsense! Come sit through this tutorial!
And so Wayne found himself bored to tears as an old man feebly tried to catch his own level 5 Weedle.COMING UP NEXT TIME ON FIRE RED: NUZLOCKE EDITION! VIRIDIAN FORESTThe next session will be tomorrow night at 7:00.
>>12780>>12781Old man how did you change your clothes so quickly. And why is your beard on your head now.
And we're back after a little grinding! Time to continue the adventure!
"Route 2! Who knows what brand new critters we'll find here!"Curry: Most likely more Pidgeys and Rattatas.
"FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUU-"DECISION TIME. ARE WE PLAYING BY THE "NO DUPLICATES" RULE OR THE "FIRST NON-DUPLICATE" RULE?
what ever rule lets you look for a different pokemon.
>>12933Then it's been decided!"YEEEEAAAAAHH! Don't knock her out, Airman!"
"Down B Down B Down B Down B..."
NAME HER.
>>12937Ramona
Mary Lue?(i don't know, i'm bad with names)
Ramona joined the party!
GRIIIIIIIIIINDIIIIIIIING
AND THEN"Eeeeeeee!"
".... :|"Curry: :|Airman: :|Ramona: :|
"Whatever, it's Viridian Forest time."Airman: Are you sure we're up for it?"Eh. I guess if we have to we'll cut and run."
"Oh God, why's he walking towards me?"
"Bring it, you little bastard!"
"OH GOD NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"Curry: Poison Sting... Well, heh, should've seen this coming...
"THIS IS HOR-oh wait I have six Antidotes, motherfucker."
Curry: EMBEEEEEEERRR!!
"Well, that wasn't so bad, and we made a little bank doin' it!"Ramona: Where I come from, enemies burst into coins, but the principle's the same.
Airman: Hey, boss, aren't there Pikachus in this forest?"WELL I GUESS WE'LL NEVER FIND OUT NOW, WILL WE?"
"GOD. DAMN IT. RAMONA. I was gonna name her Knives..."Ramona: And that's why I did what I did.
"Alright, yeah, I need to relieve a little stress."
"Wow, that went faster than I expected!"Curry: Ember...
"The exit is RIGHT FUCKING THERE and I need to get to a new area because someone ruined my chance at getting a new teammate."Ramona: I do not apologize for my actions.
Curry: Ember..."Don't get too cocky, dude, the first Gym's Rock-Type."Curry: Emb-Wait, what?
>Route 2>Route 2>ROUTE 2"MOTHER. FUCKER."
>>12963Did you try Route 23?(I won't blame you if you save abuse for Mankey.)
>>12965>One backtrack later"Should've thought of this in the first place."
"...... You aren't a Mankey."
"Welp. A 'Mon's a 'Mon, I guess."Airman: But... But you've already GOT a Flying-Type! ;-;
NAME HIM.