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File: 124348243492.jpg-(255.97KB, 810x1080, 1243462771854.jpg)
12458 No.12458
Official brainstorm thread for the medieval lesbians project, if you guys are still around. :) I like having this here, makes it much easier to keep track of.

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No.12459
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12459

No.12460
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12460

No.12461
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12461

No.12462
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12462

No.12463
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12463

No.12464
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12464

No.12465
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No.12467
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12467

No.12478
cut/paste from original thread

Squire backstory:

Impoverished hedge knight, doesn't own much more than horse and armor. He's barely more than a peasant himself. He has a daughter from his now-dead wife, who he doesn't really want to "raise like a boy," but he doesn't really know any better. And he can't bear the thought of just abandoning her to a convent or somesuch.

King calls up his vassals for war (invasion, whatever), which happens to include the hedge knight. Or maybe he's not a vassal, but goes there basically as a mercenary. He's hoping to prove himself, and earn a more prestigious and profitable fief. But he's also self-conscious about his poverty, so he brings along his daughter to pose as his squire, to try to keep up appearances. Cuts her hair and dresses her as a boy; she already knows quite a bit about riding and even fighting, and secretly wants to be his squire anyway, because she loves her father and wants to emulate him.

Hedge knight is assigned to a troop of soldiers escorting the princess at some point. They get ambushed, hedge knight does along with most/all of the rest of the escort, squire helps the princess escape capture.

Ongoing tension ensues as she doesn't know whether to reveal her sex, which would probably separate her from the princess (she thinks), and also let down her father (because she wants to be a knight just like him).

No.12485
Copy pasta from Kingswing, to summarize all that we really confirmed so far:

Kingdom under siege King or Brother sends Princess with a small group of soldiers to ask for help from a friendly nation

Soldier die except for Squire, now it is up to Squire and the Princess to make the journey alone.

Squire is more worldly and open,while Princess is more privileged and sheltered

Thought the course of the Journey they fall in love and hot lesbian sexy time

that is all we got so far

No.12506
File: 124349648342.jpg-(178.73KB, 827x589, justacoupleofguys.jpg)
12506
Well, I do certainly love lesbians and I really really do like medieval stuff. But even so, you're gonna need more detail to get off the ground running with.

Anycase, I doodled ya a picture! It just so happens that I'm working on a sorta fantasy medieval setting with a young girl disguised as a squire so... yeah... I kinda just did a pallet swap.

Who did the first picture? It's kinda nice.

No.12510
Why is this so ad'awwable!

No.12516
I think we need to better identify the antagonising force that result in the need for the Princess' trek...

-An opposing kingdom wishing to expand its control?
-A rebeling faction of the kingdom hoping to spur a revolution?
-An highly organized pack of thevies/bandits ravaging the outer villages of the kingdom?

No.12517
>>12506
http://emstone.deviantart.com/

Someone posted it the other day on /co/ and it just got us brainstormin...

No.12518
>>12462
Goddamn. That is the most adorable thing I've seen all week.

No.12520
>>12516
I say opposing kingdom trying to expand control

No.12521
>>12506
Yeah we do need more detail, right now we just have bullets points for a plot. We were hoping we can get one of the fanfic writers to start working on dialogue and stuff.

No.12522
This is adorable.

>>12521
You guys don't have a writer yet? I might be able to offer some stuff.

No.12526
Original thread is not yet archived, it needs 2 more requests. It's id number was 9667922, so please make sure we get it archived so we can refer to it when needed. There were a lot of great ideas and theme suggestions in there.

No.12532
>>12526
Under review... Fingers Crossed

No.12535
I'm not exactly sure how thread archival works. But I do know they've been more or less ignoring /co/ threads for a while now.

No.12536
In case something happens and it doesn't get archived, I did save a copy of the thread:
http://www.mediafire.com/download.php?znynnjyik0m

This idea made me feel all warm inside, though I don't know how much I can help in conjuring ideas.

No.12537
>>12536
Sweet you rock out loud,

Toss out ideas,even if they suck.

No.12538
>>12536
Awesome.

So the Squire is put in charge of the Princess and taking care of her and, due to mishaps, ends up being the only one in charge of her. After that, then what? Do they wander the woods, or are they still trying to get to the neighboring kingdom when lesbian sexytime happens?
And how should the Princess find out that Squire's really a girl? Accident, or should Squire tell her? Is it going to be 'Oh, I have a crush on this pretty boy, oh shit it's a girl but I still like her' deal?

No.12540
Do the Squire and Princess have names, or are we just going to be calling them Squire and Princess?

No.12542
>>12540
We're just using Squire and Princess as placer names though the original artist (http://emstone.deviantart.com/) referred to them as Iphis and Ianthe

No.12548
Is the original artist part of this or are we just riffing on her stuff?

No.12551
How did I not know about this? It's exactly the sort of thing I like.

Question: are we keeping this historical, or is there room for some subtle fantasy elements?

No.12552
>>12548
She's not part of this project, we're just continuing the concept presented in the orginal artwork...

>>12551
Sticking with historical, no mystical mumbo-jumbo

No.12555
>>12552
Yokay. I was just thinking how, thematically speaking, it would make sense if one or both of the girls got some kind of advice from a sagely old woman and I didn't know if she would be an actual witch or not.

No.12559
I am sick and numb of stories which try to have 'gay' as their hook

No.12561
>>12559
I'm not. Well, at least as long as I'm not paying for it.

No.12563
>>12559
It is a romance story, the hook is actually the fact that it is in medieval times.

Romances can only come in straight, gay, or freaky. You are tired of gay romance stories, but all the straight ones are still okay?

No.12564
>>12563
Well speaking for myself and not the other anon, I don't read romance stories. The closest thing I've enjoyed to a pure romance story has been either Wall-E or Shakespeare in Love. And both had fine hooks besides the wuv.

No.12567
>>12561
True, but then again I don't mind Twilight as long as I'm not paying for it

>>12563
The thing I'm sick of is people using a minority as a rare trait to put in their story
"Ooh look, its a medieval romance starring a blind disabled black princess and a bisexual hispanic with dwarfism!"

In my experience such stories usually lack traditional things such as.... plot and a coherent storyline, but your mileage may vary

No.12568
>>12563
Yeah, this. The story is 'there's these two lesbians, except one's a knight and one's a princess and it's set in olden days' instead of 'there's a knight and a princess in the olden days, but they're LESBIANS'
Since we're basing the story on their relationship, it makes sense to have the story revolve around the relationship.

No.12569
I just remembered: there are one or two cases of crossdressing lesbians in olden times who actually managed to marry their lovers and keep the true nature of their relationship secret. So this story can have a GOOD END while remaining historically accurate.

Oh God oh God please let there be a happy ending I've seen too many lesbian romances with BAD ENDs oh pleeease.

No.12573
>>12567
No that is just bad writing, using a minority as a rare trait to put in their story doesn't necessarily mean the plot will be bad. Trying to tell a story that doesn't revolve around Handsome White man meets Beautiful White girl doesn't mean the writer is resting on that idea alone to pass the story off as interesting.

No.12574
>>12569

She is cross dressing now? I thought we agreed we were not going the Mulan/ Yuri manga cliche route with this.

No.12578
It's mainly about them being very different in world views and lifestyles, and unexpectedly finding love. The ambiguity of roles in a homosexual relationship allows things a very different feel, so it's not just slapping a coat of paint on a similar boy/girl romance. The image of the princess raising the squire's sword to defend her when she is harmed stuck with several /co/mrades, myself included. The same idea would almost appear "cute" if she had spend the entire story being protected by a man, but as her protector has been a woman, the feeling of "she's just a girl" has been washed away by how capable the squire has been shown to be. This highlights their real differences, the fact that the princess has lead a pampered life and never before had to fight. It's the subtle things of that sort that make the story worth telling.

I have to say, I think Danielle Dreiberg's style is PERFECT for this. In just a few images we have a few of the key points and a good feel for how it would look overall. The two images of lovemaking are sensual but not "porny" which was something I was worried about derailing the project. Which, of course, is one of the reasons didn't attempt to draw stuff for it (that and my production speed is still rather slow).

No.12579
>>12574
Hmmm... Yeah I remember agreeing against that and going with something more along the lines of an unspoken truth

No.12580
>>12573
>doesn't necessarily mean the plot will be bad
Oh geez, then why is every story like that I come across bad?
Point me to some good ones before I lose my mind

>She is cross dressing now?
SEE
SEE!
I TOLD YOU

No.12581
>>12579
Wait, I'm a little confused by what you're implying here. Are you saying that at some point everyone will know that they're two girls but no one will ever say anything about it? Because that's fine too, but it would take a lot more suspension of disbelief given the social mores of the time.

No.12586
>>12581
I was thinkning they accepted her for whatever reason to become a soldier. I thought it was something like they needed soldiers and they were past the point were they cared about gender and cared more about actual ability. The war had taken such a toll that they ran out of able body men to form a respectable fighting force and would take anyone who offered. But I am not in charge, if you are willing to actual pen something do whatever you want. It will at least be a step to getting this accomplished.



>>12580then why is every story like that I come across bad?

Because you read garbage? Or we have different taste I really don't know

Daredevil is a superhero story...but the hook is he is blind (they used a rare minority). You can read Annie on My Mind, that was a good book and had lesbians, you can read Strangers in Paradise that had a lesbian main character . Hulk is about a mentally retarded man with radiation poisoning.

No.12588
>>12586
Hmm. I was basing my view of the situation primarily on what's written here >>12478

I understand that the Sweet Polly Oliver story is a cliche, but it's also a tried-and-true staple of classical literature, much like princess/knight romances. If we're not going to use it, then we'll have to sacrifice a little historical accuracy, which I'm also perfectly fine with. Did we even decide that this was all taking place in actual medieval England and not some fictional stand-in with subtly different societal standards?

>>12580
I forget the title, but there was this cute little indie comic about the mummy of an Egyptian pharaoh falling in love with a young lady in Victorian London. It didn't seem bad at all, despite its "gimmick."

I wish Danielle was here. She'd know what to do.

No.12592
>>12586
He may be blind the way we see but he has like RADAR superpowers

Thats like saying cyclops or storm are a rare minority

Read strangers in paradise, horrible shit. That is exactly the type of thing I'm talking about
Its like CAD nut instead of videogames its <insert offensive gimmick here>

>hulk
Are you even trying?

>>12588
I'll keep an eye out for it, sounds ok

No.12594
>>12592
>>He may be blind the way we see but he has like RADAR superpowers

Sure he can compensate for his disability, but it's easy to imagine that his character concept probably started out as "let's make a blind superhero." Yes, it was a gimmick, but it led to a good character.

No.12614
File: 124369567674.jpg-(81.09KB, 600x438, medivallesbians0.jpg)
12614
I'm no Danielle, but I was inspired by the project to doodle these out.

No.12615
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12615

No.12616
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12616

No.12617
>>12614
>>12615
>>12616
+A my good sir and/or madam.

No.12619
>>12592
>>hulk
>Are you even trying?

Twas a joke good sir


>>12616>>12615>>12614
I would blow you if it were at all possible!

No.12620
So do we have a setting/story yet?
We have the Squire, raised with boyish tendancies by her single father, though while not a true crossdresser, is allowed to disguise herself as a boy to fight for the king, due to both lack of men and respect for her father.
Other kingdom attacks. King sends Princess out to next kingdom for protection, with Squire as her personal bodyguard since no funny business could ever happen between girls (do ho) and with a larger guard group. Guard group gets attacked, everyone dies except Squire and Princess and now they have to make their way to the next kingdom on their own.
Squire, raised in a more worldly fashion, tries to educate the sheltered Princess. (Would this be in a 'you're kinda dumb and it's cute and funny' way or the more common 'Squire has her way, Princess has her way and they bicker over it until sexytiems')
At some point they get attacked and Squire gets badly hurt and Princess has to take care of her, which is the emotional climax. At another (different?) point the Princess has to fight to protect Squire.
This about right for most of it? It doesn't seem like an endings been figured out yet, but if that's about right I might be able to rough draft something up tonight.

No.12640
>>12620
Yes that is right so far, ending is completely up to you

YOU ROCK OUT LOUD btw

No.12655
Ok, I had some random ideas to day, so I'll submit them to you now:

Rival kingdom is lead by a Count that wants to expand, but has until now been a long standing friend to the kingdom. The story begins the assassination of the princess's brother, and the failed attempt on her father. The situation is heating up for a full war, and the king's champion (the squire's commander) is prepping for war to save the kingdom. The first attack on the princess doesn't kill everyone except her and the squire, but it does kill many and separate them from the champion and any other knights. Love stuff ensues, the get word that the king has been killed by an assassin.

As the last living member of the royal family, the princess is not safe while the count lives. They decide to take fate into their own hands, and take out the count before the champion leads an attack. They dress as nursemaids and infiltrate the castle, cornering the count. He explains that they can kill him, but doubts they will kill his reason for attacking: his newborn twin sons. Having seen to many small kingdoms fall into ruin in such a situation, he plans avoid tension between his sons by giving them both enough land to rule, and for that he needs the other kingdom. Frustrated, but unwilling to kill the babies or leave them fatherless, they leave, with the count's blessing and apology no less.

Finally reunited with the champion, who has amassed all the knights to crush the count's army, the princess asks him to lay down his arms. She sees that open war would lead to more death and loss then she can stand, and she can't bring herself to take vengence when she knows the price. She asks that he say she died, and that he serve the people of the land. He agrees, and the last pages show the squire and princess, older and living as a couple on a quiet farm. The two kingdoms are one, with no war.

No.12656
>>12655
I realize it's FULL of typos, but I'm pretty tired and knew I'd forget the details if I didn't type it real fast.

No.12657
>>12655
Hmm... Good, good, but I'm not quite sold on this. Let's keep tossing ideas around and see what sticks and what gets discarded.

No.12658
Another possible story bit (probably best to take place after the initial story)

Squire hurts her leg after a horse riding accident and Princess tries to adapt some of her walking etiquette lessons to help Squire rehabilitate

No.12663
>>12655
While we do need a conclusion, I'm not sure I'm entirely sold on that one yet. Sneaking back into the castle, and the Count showing them his sons instead of just killing them right there is a little... well, it doesn't seem to fit the story.
I'm not sure what to suggest, I don't like the idea of raising an army either. Maybe the King doesn't get killed, and they have to hide out until the war's over and then what?

No.12665
Something that just occurred to me: we seem to be ignoring Squire's father, the Knight. After all, he's the reason that she got caught up in this whole ordeal in the first place.

If you ask me, we shouldn't kill him off. The trauma of losing her only parent, combined with the innate stress of the situation, would likely weigh Squire down to the point where romance would be near-impossible. Instead, what if he's captured? I might be remembering this wrong, but I think the medieval code of honor had provisions for taking enemy knights captive. That way there's a secondary goal besides rescuing the Princess, thus opening up the plot for more possibilities.

No.12666
>>12663
Well, the entire point I see behind him not being a just plain evil villain is that he's doing what he thinks is best for his sons, no matter the cost. With the situation as it had become, and knowing that she can never continue her own family line since she loves the squire, it would be the final choice between her duty and her desire for personal happiness. We could back this up by an argument between the squire and the princess as to what makes the kingdom: the royalty or the peasantry.

I was also thinking the champion, or the squire's father could be seen visiting them in them on their farm in the end, wearing the colors of the new joined kingdom. This would symbolize that, having survived the take over, the knights have insured the safety of the peasants during the transition, and their traditions have been incorporated into the new combined knighthood.

If a truly vile villain is needed, and must die, then we could develop the assassin. Course, it's just a suggestion, and hopefully will start some good discussion.

No.12667
>>12665
It was very common practice to take defeated knights prisoner, because if someone can afford a horse and armor, he most likely has a household which can afford a ransom.

No.12670
I realized that there is no reason the captain of the knights can't be the squire's father. This would put him very close to the King, in fact they could be good friends. That would also allow the king to know right off that the squire is a girl and, since she is the 'son' of a close friend, why he trust her to protect his own daughter.

>>12655
Cut out the part about her having a brother. Adds an unneeded character and complicates things too much. I figure an attempted assassination would be enough to get the King on alert and focus protection on his daughter.

How about, since it's done through assassins or bandit gangs, they don't know right off who is against them? That way, the very kingdom they are going to seek aid from is the count who ordered the attacks. Not sure how they will discover that the count is behind it all, however (that'll take more thinking).

No.12671
>>12667
This could mesh with the idea of the Knight being relatively poor for someone of his social status.

No.12672
>>12670
>>How about, since it's done through assassins or bandit gangs, they don't know right off who is against them? That way, the very kingdom they are going to seek aid from is the count who ordered the attacks. Not sure how they will discover that the count is behind it all, however (that'll take more thinking).
I like this a lot. It's not the same old "oh no our enemies are attacking who could have seen that coming."

One thing I'm curious about, though: why would it be necessary for anyone to know Squire's gender for her to be assigned to protect Princess? I assumed that she was just following her father around, and she only ended up as Princess's protector when everyone else got killed/captured/separated.

No.12673
>>12672
Someone suggested it to show the king being over protective of his daughter, and not wanting any boys too close to her.
>>12620
This post mentions it as well. I'm not sure how much of a deal everyone wanted to make out of it, perhaps even just have those in the castle know and not have a problem with it. Perhaps even have some of the castle staff comment how hard it must be for a girl to be a knight's 'son'. Basically, people who don't know her would assume she's a boy just because the squire outfit and such, while everyone who knows her personally knows she a girl.

No.12674
>>12673
Yeah, I see it that she's just sorta deemed the exception to the rule sort of thing.

>>12670>>12665
I like the tweeeest of the 'savior' kingdom actually being the baddy and the dad getting kidnapped instead of killed. When the girls find out could be either a) initial attack on the group that gets them seperated/captured, b)when they go to saved Squire's dad or c) when they get to the neighbouring kingdom and find out 'oh shit' and then have to escape or fight them off or whatnot.

Another idea is that the opposing kingdom is doing a sort of double cross, when they have half their army disguised and fighting as a different kingdom, then offers their aid to secure the Princess (to marry her?, ransom? idk)

No.12675
All of these are great ideas, I just hope they aren't too complex to put into one comic. Handling so many elements correctly requires alot of work. While I of course wouldn't mind it being several comics long, I want to be realistic. I doubt we can get any draw fag or writefag (is that a term?) to actually work on several comics or one HUGE comic.

That is why i am in favor of a more straight forward story.

No.12676
>>12675
skill + fag is the acceptable way to address or comment on someone with a skill. It can also be used as a verb ("I was drawfagging all night") or to denote the work of a skillfag ("This is some solid codefaggory").

I will admit, right now, I'm looking at a 60+ page story. That's rushing through the intrigue and taking proper time for the romance and character development. I've written and outlined a 120 page comic before, didn't get around to fully drawing it. I got a lot more on my plate these days (been helping on various projects related to /tg/, including a playtest I'm running for the next month) but if I will at least continue to post my ideas and suggestions. If I have time for more, I'll do more though. I mainly want to be sure we have a pretty good consensus before I proceed in any major way towards fully writing it out.

No.12737
>>12676
Can't wait to read it

No.12740
>>12676
>>skill + fag is the acceptable way to address or comment on someone with a skill. It can also be used as a verb ("I was drawfagging all night") or to denote the work of a skillfag ("This is some solid codefaggory").
Someday, I hope a linguisticsfag comes to document the Chans as an example of how languages change through insularity.

No.12894
>>12676

I was serious when I said I can't wait to read it. I CAN"T WAIT I WANT IT NOW!

or

Any progress so far buddy?

No.13100
>>12894
Honestly... not really. I've been knee deep in playtesting a /tg/ project (which oddly had a borderline lesbian moment that was interesting). I have been thinking about this off and on though, maybe I should take sometime just to get an outline down. I guess it would be alot easier to dive into it once I have something I can show everyone and ask "do you guys like this idea?" I'll pop in a DVD and get my ideas going. Now... where did that put my Berserk boxset....

No.13102
Ok, kinda got a basic set up for the start, along with a few ideas for the rest (hope to get more detail in later).

*Princess, alone, enjoying a quiet time in a field
*The assassination attempt on the King, crossbow bolt. Deflected by Captain of the guard, knights on alert.
*Assassin flees, knocks over Princess. She sees his face
*King and Captain having formal conversation on matter, King most concerned with his daughter's safety. Knights dismissed.
*King and Captain continue, much less formally. King wants his daughter protected, suggest the Captain's 'son'. Explains his fatherly concerns.
*Squire arrives, talked about and greeted by others. Seen only in bits or silhouette.
*Princess talking to maid brushing her hair, about her concerns and worries about having a fulltime bodyguard.
*Maid tells her that the Captain's son will surprise her, Squire appears.
*Captain and King talking about the plain to get aid, pan outside to Princess and Squire talking.
*1-2 pages of talking, ends with Captain approaching them.
*Group sets off, overlayed by explanation of the plan to send the Princess to request aid from a friendly kingdom.
*1-3 pages of more talking
* Bandits, 3-5 pages. Squire should be an impressive, but very unconventional fighter. Not needed that she scores many kills, incapping and entangling enemies to escape is fine.
*Princess and Squire are separated, maybe a short montage of camping until they end up taking refuge in a small farming village.

That's basically the first half. They have to fall in love while living the farm life, and make love in their bed on the upper level of the barn. I kinda wanted a cute page where the Princess is jealous after seeing the Squire talking to a boy, and the Squire quickly picks up on it and comforts her.

This is about when the bandits would attack the village and lead to a fight in the barn, the Squire using ever farm impliment and bit of junk to defeat foes until she's wounded. With the time the Squire bought, the Princess recovers the sword and confronts the bandits. While unable to do much, she buys time for the villagers to save them both (this will help enforce the importance of the peasants). Upon recovering from her injuries, the Squire finds the Princess crying because the news has come that her father has been killed. Not knowing a way to protect the Princess by herself, Squire determines they must complete the mission, and hope that there is no danger with the bandits defeated. Upon arriving (in normal disguises as peasants) the Princess sees and identifies the assassin talking to the Duke, and the figure it all out. Then the ending I described before (so I don't have to type it again). Last page reflects the quite first page, but this time they are together, leading a simple life.

No.13103
Ok, to explain a few of my reasons for things. I first thought of a page or two explaining more about how the King and Captain are good friends, maybe even a flashback to their youth to start out. But the leads wouldn't be in ANY of those pages, and I wanted to keep that to a minimum. Just a basic bit of self editing. I also didn't put in the idea of the Captain being kidnapped. It's a good idea, but it adds another instance of the leads being proactive, instead of reactionary. Saving the proactive stuff til the climax makes it a bit more powerful, I think, and I have a pretty good idea for parts of the barn fight, and not some "bandit hideout" fight. So, this is my first draft, of the first third/half of the idea, focused on keeping the leads on almost every page (and mentioned on the ones they don't show up on) and keeping it as sweet and short as possible. I'll try to work on the rest later.

No.13286
>>13102
Sounds awesome

No.14088
Wow, awesome thread.
I wish to see more of this.

No.14239
>>14088
Me to

No.14240
>>14239
>>14088
thirded.

No.14244
They need someone else to travel with them.

A person that keeps walking in on them, and cockbocking them. It could be funny.
Perhaps, a little kid they find along their travels, an orphan who was left for dead in a decimated town.

No.14268
File: 124683990317.jpg-(103.91KB, 1169x829, princessxsquiredraft01.jpg)
14268
I did a few quick layouts, may try to do some more when I have time. I definitely will if these help along the creation of full pages. If the basic idea I have is enough to get an artist dedicated to it, then I'll work on laying it all out with all possible haste. Both the drawfags who tied to this are perfectly acceptable in my opinion, and I would not be against them working together as long as they could figure out the best way to share the load. If the project got a good start and kept a good pace, I wouldn't even be against doing a bit of it, if I could produce something closer in style to the others. Basically, I'm saying I'm gung ho for this project, if I know others are there to back me up.

Here is my layout for the first page and the final page, to highlight the similarities. Look at it first, then if my sketches are so terrible that you can't make it out, here is the quick breakdown:

first page:
p1: Sunrise on a beautiful day. There is a beautiful flower in the foreground and a gentle hill in the back, with the princess walking over it. Wind is gently blowing her dress and hair.
p2: Close up of flower, the morning dew glistening on it.
p3: The princess looks happy, content.
p4: Close of the princess picking the flower. Her hands should look as delicate as possible, almost as though they should be unable to even pluck a flower from the ground.
p5: The princess leaning back on a tree, the sun rising in the background.

last page
p1: The gentle fields that the two leads grow, a beautiful flower in the foreground. The princess is stepping from the tall grass, the wind catching her hair and dress. The sun is setting off panel.
p2: A gloved hand is picking the flower from the ground with ease.
p3: The princess is overjoyed, her smile beaming.
p4: The squire, holding the flower out to her/the reader. Though a young woman, her look is that of a suave man of the world, confident and in love.
p5: The sun sets in the background, the princess lays back against the squire who in turn leans against a tree. The squire holds the flower for the princess, the princess's face is turned slightly back, as though they are about to kiss, or have just kissed.

No.14269
File: 124684093547.jpg-(133.73KB, 1090x850, princessxsquiredraft02.jpg)
14269
Ok, here are pages 2 and 3. I was still warming up with 2, so I have some correction notes for the final art, but 3 is just how I want it for the most part. Dialog is subject to change, as I others may have better ideas for it. That goes for any and all layouts and script ideas I have, as I don't want to make it unappealing to those who have worked on this so much so far. Still, I am taking the initiative and going to attempt to put out the best stuff I can.

Page 2
p1: King and Captain on horseback, knights behind then.
-King: Good Captain, where has my daughter gotten off to?
p2: Captain looking towards the tree in the background, the glint of metal reflecting the sun catching his eye.
-Captain: My lord, she is....what the devil!
p3: The assassin, using the brush for cover, his crossbow ready.
p4: The crossbow bolt sails through the air!
p5: The king, seeing the bolt as it speeds towards him, his reaction of shock and fear as he is too late to move.
p6: The captain unsheaths and swings his sword in one motion, slicing the bolt in two and killing it's momentum.
p7: The king is dazed as the captain and the knights get to action. The captain orders men toward the assassin while two guard the king, looking very much like secret service in chainmail.
-Captain: It came from the brush! You men guard his highness, you men with me!

Page 3
p1: Princess is startled by the shouts, and the noise of rustling bushes behind her.
p2: Princess in fore, shocked by the assassin as he chrages through the bush, twigs and leaves catching and breaking at his passing.
p3: Princess is knocked off her feet as the Assassin rushes past.
p4: Assassin looks back and yells at princess as he runs, his face clear and grotesque.
-Assassin: One side, brat!
p5: Assassin flees over the hill, his cloak billowing from his speed.
p6: The captain and other knights arrive, halting in concern for the Princess. The princess is on the ground, looking bewildered at the path the assassin took.
-Captain: Princess! Are you alright, M'lady?

No.14281
ooh...nice panel layout.

Waiting when you finalized it...

No.14285
>>14268 >>14269
Ok, these are just awesome.
Can't wait to see more of this.

No.14299
>>14244
That doesn't sound funny, it just sounds cliche and horrible...like something you would see in a bad kids film.

No.14303
Ideas like a cuntblocker and a badass horse are interesting on different levels, but ultimately what I'm going to try to do is make this as short as possible. If the artist would like to dedicate the time to developing some of these ideas more, I'm open to fleshing things out some. As is, I'm more concerned about keeping motivation in all parties (myself included) throughout the whole project. For example, I mentioned a 2 page conversation between the Captain and the King, which for the layouts (I'll scan it later) has been reduced to one page. Mostly cause, no matter how likable I make them, they are not the focus of the story, and not the reason anyone is involved. I realized as I was about to do the outline that I simply didn't want to spend so much time with the girls not on the page, and delaying the arrival of the squire by even one page seemed like a total act of foolishness. I'll do my best to be bold when it comes to cutting things that distract from the main story (two very different people falling in love) and remain open to any new ideas that help that idea along. I worry about keeping the balance once I introduce the characters of the small village they will take shelter in, as those characters would have to be developed enough to be sympathetic, but take over the whole of the story. Oh well, I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.

No.14313
>>14299
Yeah, after I posted that I realized that it was a bit cliche. However, I do think they need someone else to intereact with.
Maybe an older knight, someone that covers up for them.
He understands their dilema perhaps? Hell, maybe he was in love with a fellow knight when he was younger, but was killed, or something like that.

No.14314
>>14313
I think it works best with just them. The whole appeal of this is that it's a cute little love story between these two characters, not an epic tale with a cast of thousands.

No.14315
>>14314
I'm just throwing ideas I saw someone posting pics at /co/ and came here to see if there was more.
I find it suprising that it was pretty much dead, so thats why I bumped it, asking for more.

No.14326
All things considered, I think even the ideas we reject are helpful, since it helps clarify what the story is and isn't. I remember the idea of a lesbian villain being mentioned in the first thread, but I and others were adamantly against it. I think we struck a good feel for the idea now, which isn't overly sexual (though the love scene will be very sensual) or slapstick (though there is much room for humor). So, certainly toss out your ideas, and don't be offended if a thought is rejected. Afterall, it might be an idea you can use in a different project.

No.14355
File: 124702356683.jpg-(137.50KB, 1097x850, princessxsquiredraft03.jpg)
14355
Some more consolidation. As I said before, I cut the 2 page conversation between the Captain and King down to 1 page, and the page of people talking to or about the Squire while the Princess talks about the situation with her maid have been combined. Just basic flow became alot clearer as I laid it out. I'll type up a detailed description to go with the panels later.

No.14384
>>14355
Looking good.
But yeah, throwing ideas around can't be that bad.

No.15254
File: 124855821046.jpg-(88.66KB, 936x680, princessxsquiredraft04.jpg)
15254
Here we have the reveal of the squire page, and the first page of talking between the princess and the squire. The second to last panel involves the princess lamenting that she doesn't have a 'handsome boy' as her guardian. The last panel is the squire joking "Ah, but my dear princess, despite being a girl, I AM a handsome boy!" as she takes a fair amount of pride in how good looking a squire she is. It's also my favorite little joke so far, and her face there almost wants a "BWAHAHAHAHA" added to the panel (but that would be a bit much).

No.15327
File: 124866405016.jpg-(71.26KB, 301x452, lg6865.jpg)
15327
Keep going, stranger.

No.15456
File: 124883412634.jpg-(89.26KB, 936x680, princessxsquiredraft05.jpg)
15456
Ok, here we have the next pages. I decided the princess would make some comment about a boy being able to get her the best apple on the tree. I was thinking a green one surrounded by red ones, or the other way... then I realized I wasn't sure apples trees did that. Eitherway, if someone knows, chime in. So Squire climbs the tree like a monkey, and they talk about other things a bit. I have a love of drawing the squire doing nutty shit or making faces, and I think I got a good bit of that in.

It ends with the Captain and King arriving to tell them they thought of a plan (sending her as a messenger to the other kingdom) and the squire hanging from the tree with apple in hand. With this set of pages, I'm not sure when I'll work on this more. It's the first 9 pages and the last, ready for an artist to start, or at least comment on if they are liking it. But as it is, I haven't seen mention of the artist here in a long while, so I'm not sure who is still interested. If no one is interested, that means I have to fully draw it to see it done, and I have another project I'm working on that I need to devote some time too. If the artist resurfaces, then count on me wrapping this stuff up as fast as I can. I do believe this comic has a lot of potential, but I know I won't have time to fully draw it for a long time. If we have an artist though, I am fine with keeping up on the writing and layout duties.

No.18247
So.... I should basically just get on this if I ever want to see it finished, eh? Darn, I was really hoping to let someone else do all the heavy lifting.

No.18251
>>18247
>Darn, I was really hoping to let someone else do all the heavy lifting.

HA! HA! Seriously though, nice work you've got here.

No.19404
>>15456

just out of curiosity, how come the "page boy hairdo" is mostly a female thing those days?

No.22819
Because it's less acceptable for priests to fuck pageboys, so it's less appropriate for boys to have it.

No.22836
Can we review what's been decided so far? I'm a little lost.

No.23211
I just tried to make a thread about this only to get a dupe error that led me here. I am pleased.

Bumping because this idea makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside and I might contribute later.

No.23633
I don't know if this is relevant, but-
Can the two girls start out on less than friendly terms- squire resents guarding the princess when she could be training or whatever, and for the princesses being all prissy and fancy fancy kind of deal?

No.23844
I feel it's time for me to take this project more seriously and make moves toward seeing it's completion. If anyone can help me contact the 3 artists who drew designs, pics and strips, that would be greatly helpful. I'm of the opinion, if a bunch of guys from /a/ can make a damn videogame, a bunch of guys from /co/ can sure as heck make a quick comic book. Since I've long ago migrated to mainly /tg/, I've taken the motto of "gettin' shit done" and that's exactly what I finally want to do with this idea. My email is in the field, so either send me a mail or post info here. Thank you.

>>23633
The main reason they aren't that far apart at first is mostly cause it would slow the romance a fair bit, and I'm trying to make this as short as possible and still be satisfying. I also feel that at the start the squire has no problem with things becoming romantic, even if it's no her immediate concern. As for the princess, she's a young girl who dreams of romance, who slowly opens up to the fact that another female contains all the qualities that she has fantasized about finding in a male. That's the perspective I'm taking with the story, and hope it's agreeable with an artist if I find one. If it ends up being just me... well, then I guess I just do it however I feel.

No.24016
File: 126923853322.png-(551.47KB, 800x1035, PNC-001.png)
24016
... I... I kinda want to help with this. It seems like a fun project.

I work well with deadlines, and horribly without. I've been poking about with my own comic, pic related. Strongly considering pitching in my efforts, since layouts have already been put down.

No.24066
File: 126933040350.jpg-(128.79KB, 662x1023, Dante.jpg)
24066
>Medieval Lesbians
So what, do they get help from their pal Dante?

No.24076
>>24066
Dante, Joan of Arc, Altair, and King Arthur guest star

Don't worry about the timeline

No.24263
Stranger, your ending annoys me. First of all, it nullifies the motivation for the characters' quest. Thus it makes the whole journey pointless. If the focus is to be on romance, then don't let a journey of retribution get in the way.

Secondly, the Count killed the king and prince. How is the princess supposed to just let him get away with it? He is set up as the villain only to have our heroes spare him. That's not just anticlimactic, it's boring.

Going back to the king, you said before that the squire can't lose a father because that would create too much emotional baggage. How would this not be true for the princess?

I suggest instead that the princess was simply in need of a personal guard, and that the squire was available. As stated before, the driving force behind this assignment was the assumption that the squire and princess wouldn't fool around. That setup alone opens up a host of character moments, and even the prospect of an ongoing series to develop their world. Figure out the wartime arc later, keep the focus on the main couple.

There has been one character moment in particular that's been stirring in my head. In accordance with the code of chivalry, a knight is prepared to die for their charge. Our squire knows this, and knows full well of her own mortality. Because of this, she trains the princess to fight. These scenes have an "I will die for you, and you must live on" vibe to them. This is turned on its head during the wartime arc, when the squire is injured and it is up to the princess to do what needs to be done. In spite of the squire's pleas of self-preservation, the princess uses her fighting ability to defend her love. This not only breaks the code of chivalry that the squire has been clinging to, but the damsel-in-distress cliche as well. This one moment makes their romantic relationship that much stronger and outright kills the notion of a professional relationship.

No.24264
>>24066
Wouldn't he notice that they live in "sin"?

>>24263
I do dig the whole chivalry thing. BTW, do they have any sort of antagonist, besides the Count?

No.24491
>>24016
Did you email stranger?

No.24501
>>24491

Knew I forgot to do something.

No.24561
File: 127077832164.jpg-(698.75KB, 1400x1600, SC hilde.jpg)
24561
>>24076
As long as Joan of Arc looks something similar to this, and become like an overprotective sister to both of them.

No.24562
>>24263
... ya know, I'm not sure when I got hooked on the idea of the father having to die. Honestly, with the idea of the Duke having twins, perhaps a much better arrangement could be made if the King was still alive. The kingdom WOULD go to the husband of the princess, but as she now wouldn't have one, the King would have no proper heir. The Duke could agree that he would allow the King to take one of his sons to raise to inherent his realm, while the Duke raised the other. This way they still rush to complete their mission (as soon as they have recovered from any injuries, and of course feel safe from bandits). This idea allows basically the outline I tossed out, with a few changes I'll try to smooth out into one single idea later. Also, so as the shame of trying to kill his friend is not made public, the Duke agrees to hand over the assassin. Unsure if the princess will have to pretend to be dead or not, but that's something we can talk about. Other ideas are also interesting, and I'll have to think on it all longer to try and work it all in just right.

>>24016
Just got your email (which is why I'm here today) and I do like your style. Haven't looked around enough to find more examples of your stuff, but since you say you work better with a deadline, why not toss out a few "try outs". Character study pic of the princess and squire, along with a pic or two of scenes you have in mind (they don't even have to be scenes in the outline, just images that come to you when you think of the story concept). By monday should be good, just post what you have by then. It'll also give me a rough idea of how fast you go, which will be good to know. I personally would take alot of inspiration from >>12463 but I won't hold you to anything too tight.

All the interest is a real motivator, and for that I thank you all.

*rolls up sleeves*

HEAVEN OR HELL
LET'S ROCK!

No.24563
>>24562

I'll see what I can do. Thanks to college, time is short, but I'll see what I can fit in. A few class-related projects are in the way... Must kill those first.

No.24565
So, the princess has a twin brother like in Hellboy II?

No.24567
>>24565
The whole prince character actually got cut out at some point, mostly to save space. He'd be extra in the way now, so pretend we never talked about such a character.

>>24563
Slay all assignments that stand in your way!

No.24569
>>24567

FOR ASGARD

RAAAAAAAGH

Actually, I have a four-hour break between meetings tomorrow, and might shrug aside a bit of social interactivity that evening. Maybe I could throw up my interpretations of the characters. At the very least, sketches.

No.24583
File: 127083050363.png-(196.10KB, 1004x896, medles-test.png)
24583
I took a crack at the characters. Not sure how I feel about the princess; will work on it a little more. Think the squire could work, though.

No.24590
>>24583
I really like your style.
Anyway, squire looks great. But yeah, I guess the princess could use more work, perhaps a more girly look.

Also, is this supposed to take place in an actually time and place in history, or just an idealized middle ages, like with Avalon and King Arthur.

No.24591
>>24583
Very nice! Yeah, feel free to take another go at the princess, but not sure exactly what advice to give yet. I realize I haven't done real pics of them to see how I feel about my style, just the outlines. Perhaps I'll do a few sketches when I have a chance.

No.24594
>>24591
>>24590

I wanted to try rounder features to sort of contrast with Squire's more pointed features, but I don't think it works. I'll likely give her more elegant, gentler features and thin her face up a bit. I'll take another crack tonight.

No.24595
>>24594

That was me. I've been... hopping around way too many computers today.

I'm a compuwhore.

No.24599
>>24594
Good idea, the softer and more elegant the facial features the better, at least in the case of princess.

Beauty mark?

No.24614
>>24599

I have a few drawings I've done, but haven't gotten to a scanner. I'm liking how the princess is turning out. Tried the beauty mark, too. Don't know where to locate it, so I opted for the left side of her face, below her mouth line.

No.24628
For the life of me, I cannot get access to my scanner til tomorrow [later today, technically, since it's... four in the freakin' morning]. I can take a few shots on my phone and upload them that way, though. Anyone mind that, if only to get them seen quicker?

No.24632
File: 127098329429.png-(609.45KB, 1020x1320, test-page-1-of-infinity.png)
24632
Screw it; I decided to take a quick crack at a page with rough layout. I really like the idea of the scene where the Squire decides to teach the Princess to defend herself. So... Here's one page of that. I'll work on another page either tonight or tomorrow.

No.24636
>>24632
Thats pretty good.
I like this design of the princess much better, the new face, hair, and beauty mark really did helped.

No.24639
>>24632
This... pleases me to an absurd degree. I'll work more on the script this week, try to get things organized again.

No.24642
>>24636
>>24639

Glad you guys enjoy! I didn't prepare too much for the image [it shows], but it was more meant to show the character designs and get me into actually doing sequential format.

I just think this could really be a fun project, if handled tastefully. We have a final outline and all that?

Also, if anyone else is good at coloring, maybe we could convince them to take a few cracks at whatever finished or close-to-finished pages we post. Because I'm not so hot on it.

No.24643
>>24642
Well, I certainly like your range of expressions, and your sense of pacing. I'll be honest, as I wasn't sure if I'd find anyone else wanting to draw the comic, it probably made me condense alot of things to get a lower page count. So tell me what you think of the layouts so far, especially if I'm being too economical for a pace you are comfortable with. I'll do some sketches tonight probably, but am curious if you would like to split the artistic duties, or would rather shoulder them on your own. When I assumed there would be a few artist involved I saw no problem with it, but now the choice is yours to make. I guess finally we should make a for sure decision on whether characters will have names, or if we'll refer to them by title/nickname/etc. A name for the whole comic can wait. I don't have a full outline, just a rough one here, and that will be adjusted to take in the new idea for an ending. Still, the first half is probably untouched, just need to figure out how to make it all wrap up.

No.24645
>>24643

I've gone over the layouts a fair amount of times, and I do like them. I don't think you need to be so economic with the page layouts; do what you feel is best for the story. If there's any way I feel it can be improved, I can just run some suggestions by you.

Splitting artistic duties is always grand, if only to ease workload, but I'm not suggesting a whole frackin' team or anything like that. It'd be nice for someone to handle final inks, sure, but a good colorist can fill in for any values I miss. I can certainly attempt color, but I'd rather make a pass at a good chunk of the comic in black and white before I try to color.

As for names for the characters... In all honesty, if the comic is so fiercely focused on these two characters, names outside of their labels aren't entirely necessary. You could easily write without. I always prefer having names to refer to them by outside of the comic itself, and it helps to have their names handy in such a rare instance that we would need them.

No.24648
File: 127102790369.png-(1.00MB, 742x1095, test-shots-medles.png)
24648
A whole bunch of tests and studies. And bees.

No.24649
File: 127102823573.png-(919.26KB, 1155x651, fuckyoshitcombined.png)
24649
One more. Kind of had an idea of the Squire breaking out of the dungeon of the traitorous king they were hoping would save them, and kicking some ass in order to get the princess back.

... I also kinda like the last line.

No.24650
“Let me tell you a story. Once, there was a King named Jacob…”

“We aren’t interested in fairy tales, swine!” Squire’s holds a fistful of the Duke’s expensive clock in one hand, the sword dangerously close to him in the other. The Duke’s face shows only the slightest alarm, a fair bit more composure then most would show.

“I assure you, this is no fairy tale, and it details exactly why I have taken these actions.”

“L-let him continue. I wish to hear his reasons.” She is behind the squire, obviously unaccustomed to seeing her enraged out of combat.

“Give us the short of it then, I’ll suffer no stalling!” Squire’s gaze is still fixed on the Duke.

“King Jacob had a brother, and one day his brother lead a rebellion against him. It was a bloody conflict, only through vicious combat did his brother eventually overthrow Jacob and become King himself. I don’t wish that fate for my sons, I don’t wish them to ever draw blade against one another. As things are, I can only give one kingdom, but if I had two… perhaps I could avoid such a tragedy for my bloodline.”

Squire’s expression is less enraged now, more frustrated, disappointed. “What makes you think your sons would grow to fight such a war? Do you plan to raise them as beast that would squabble over your throne at such a cost? Perhaps you do, since you are the only one I can see who is as bloodthirsty as those in your little story!”

The Duke’s looks is stern, obviously feeling Squire’s opinions childish “You do in fact know such “beasts”, as it is your King who took his throne from his brother, through blood and blade.

Reaction shot of the girls, Squire doing a better job of hiding the shock, Princess completely dumbstruck.

>Above is my first idea for how to explain better the Duke's reasoning for his actions, and a few plot points to lay down for developing the king, and the captain. The King did indeed overthrow his brother Jacob (or whatever name, it's just a place holder), but only because Jacob had become a tyrant to his people. Going with the ending of the Duke giving one of his sons to the King to raise, as the twins were basically just born, the boy does not yet have a name. The Duke asks what the King will name him, and the King will give him his brother's name, showing how much he regretted raising sword against his brother. The Captain can be used as a good way to explain a bit of the reasons he overthrew the old King though. Tell me what you think, I'm still disorganized and trying to cover all my bases.

No.24651
>>24632>>24648>>24649
Wow, I'm really liking your take on these characters. They are both pretty cute in their own way.
Also, I loved the whole "my princess" and "smooch" thing.

No.24652
>>24651

Thanks! Every time I draw the characters together, their relationship comes off as a little more subtle. Simple votes of confidence, a little change in pronoun usage [as in, "my princess"], little things like that. The princess doing the "smooch" thing was purely for d'aww, however. I've been giving Squire freckles, oddly enough. Not a lot of brunettes are seen with them, so I hope they come off as more of just an interesting physical trait and less the fetish fuel I know some people will see it as.

>>24650

I'm digging it. I know it hasn't been popular in this thread, but having a solid background will only help flesh out the world. Much of the relationship between the two characters is going to come from their reactions to the political shift in the world, and there're bound to be differences between the two that could come up.

The reveal's pretty interesting. It certainly puts the Duke in a slightly more sympathetic light, which causes all sorts of fun conflict. Can't wait to see more context.

No.24653
I am, again, astounded by your work, and love the look of things. The scene you haven't is compelling enough where I think I'll have to work it in (shouldn't be hard at all). I'll probably be writing the rest of the script in a similar way to my last post there, though I may still do layouts and such if I have a specific idea right off for the page flow. I'll probably write out the idea for the next page, as the reason the layouts stopped is I didn't know EXACTLY how I wanted to do it. It mostly involves a conversation between the King and Princess before she leaves, but with the Squire doing a trick running horse mount in the background (running up from behind the horse and vaulting into the saddle, which I read is a trick that Joan of Arc could do). So, it may be haphazard, but I'll have a mix of layouts and scripts until the plot is all laid out, and then we can work on any editing, tweaking or sprucing up the basic idea needs. Thanks to you, I'm amazingly excited about the project again, and will give it my all.

No.24654
>>24653
>The scene you have (drawn) is compelling enough where I think I'll have to work it in

That's what I meant to say, random stuff going on here probably lead to me typing gibberish. Oh, also, I make no claims to be a master of dialog, especially on a first pass, so tell me if you have any suggestions for improving lines and such as we go.

No.24655
>>24653

I'll certainly be here in wait, drawing ideas whenever they come. I don't mind a mixture of script and panel layout, honestly; if I ever need help with clarification, I can just hit you up for more info. I think my next task is taking a crack at the panel layouts you've put up already. Maybe I can have an inked page or two by the end of the week; gonna focus on getting them fully sketched out [with backgrounds this time] and maybe posting them here when I'm satisfied with them.

No.24656
>>24654

Oh, certainly! I'd love to help with dialog.

No.24658
>freckles and beauty marks
I like this more and more.

No.24659
Can anybody give me a quick rundown on the characters and overall story?
The shorter the better, thanks.

No.24660
Guy who was against the original ending here: I still don't like it. It comes out of left field and fizzles out any building tension in the story. I'll admit that the idea itself is intriguing, but we aren't writing A Song of Ice and Fire here. I want the two protagonists to have a solid win here, not a compromise that leads to a quiet life in the countryside. The original concept was Classic Medieval Adventure With Lesbians, and I'd like to stick to it.

Or maybe it's me that has lost sight of the project's intent. If so I apologize. The ending just seems so weird to me. Especially when you work in the secret history of the Princess' kingdom, which shouldn't be so secret if the King's actions were truly so justified.

No.24661
>>24660
Not even sure what the ending is right now, but as long as they win and survive at the end I'm cool with it. I mean, for some reason I keep seeing lesbians getting BAD END in various different medias, particularly anime.

No.24662
>>24660
My justification, at the moment at least, is that the princess would be sheltered from such things, and the squire probably never cared enough to learn of it. As for the ending, I have the feeling of anything that ended on a note of violence, or where violence was the answer, wasn't the right fit for things. I've even wondered if an end for the assassin (now only a would be assassin) that involves his death is proper or not. As for the bandits, I never really considered "all the bandits are killed" right, and even have been toying with the idea that they would be seen working the main character's land as farmhands. I guess, if I were to tie it to the Squire's growth, she starts as a cocky young 'boy' and grows to feel responsible through the realization of more the Princess's mortality then her own. To go through the story which is basically meeting, falling in love, overcoming adversity, and marriage, then the ending should involve agreement, rather then one side overcoming and oppressing the other. I guess you could say, if Love is a Battlefield, then Marriage is a Compromise.

That's the direction I'm coming from.

>>24661
I'm pretty sure everyone involved would hate me for all time if I even suggested giving them a BAD END.

No.24663
>>24662

Yeah, Bad End would basically mean I'd never want to finish this comic in hopes of delaying the inevitable, heh.

As for the ending, you want to be careful to have a lot of these details and not let them go unresolved for the characters in question. I'm assuming the Squire's only charge is to protect the Princess and escort her to safety, correct? It's not her battle to get involved in the politics and warfare. Not until her duty is complete will she stray from it. To that end, the only goal is for them to finally have peace away from the battle. For all intents and purposes, they could simply find land beyond the war line, and the conflict is finding where they could go as all trustworthy lines of communication are cut due to betrayal, war, and so forth. It's important to keep the details to flesh out the world, but unless you want their goal to change, make sure they keep focused on it. Everything they do has to go towards the end of finding peace away from battle. To which end, it also calls into question whether or not they ever return to the kingdom; your ending so far entails that they either can no longer return or decide to cut off ties completely to live with one another. In which case, it'd be great to have a moment where the Squire finally sheds the formal part of her duty, and makes that transition from royal duty to personal. Their transformation towards these new roles are going to be important, as are their reasons for doing so. The war can continue, be left unresolved, a tale for another day, as that isn't the purpose. We just need to know they've made it out okay and finally accomplish their task.

No.24664
>>24663
You are right, and there were actually alot more King and Captain things I thought of at first that I cut because it didn't directly involve the girls (and was thus boring in comparison). The idea I had originally involved her faking her death (which was fine since her dad was dead), but now am not exactly sure. She could fake her death to make sure no one questions if there are any heirs besides her adopted brother/the Duke's son, but that might not be needed. She could live in another land, or honestly, either of the two lands mentioned, as war would be avoided. They could flee and it would be a solid ending if their love was the only concern, but I think making them responsible for the fates of the people of both lands is rather satisfying. Also, doing something for the future of two newborns allows them to do something maternal, which wouldn't be very easy to work in otherwise. Even looked at the stuff now, I'm confident in the set up, and the last page. Everything between there, I'm working on though. For the original end I had the Captain visit the Princess, talk a bit about the peace and changes in the years, but now I can have the King and her new brother visit as well. Oh well, I'll ramble if I continue, time for bed here. But I'm very happy to get to solidify the project bit by bit.

No.24665
>>24664

The maternity thing unnerves me a bit. I think it's an unnecessary aspect, in all honesty. The newborns will have someone to raise them, go ahead and assume they will be given a proper upbringing without them. Besides, even if people know she's alive, the people will probably only honor one of the male heirs. Princesses were important bartering tools, utilized to gain more land and inherit more wealth for the family by being married off [which I'm not sure should be a major element of the story... arranged marriages, anyway]. Meaning, of course, we're not going to be having a Queen out of her any time soon. But with wartime efforts, the King likely doesn't want to lose that opportunity somewhere down the line, thus the reason for charging the Squire with the task of escorting the Princess somewhere safe until everything is okay. Perhaps there COULD be a cover story that the Princess was killed, in order to stave off any suspicion, and they use that story as a means of getting out unnoticed. That's just an idea, though.

No.24667
File: 127105069610.png-(754.72KB, 893x1155, test-page-2-of-infinity.png)
24667
Another little crack at things, a continuation of >>24632. Practicing lettering and bubbles.

No.24668
File: 127105953320.png-(355.11KB, 893x1155, test-page-2-of-infinity-with-inks.png)
24668
More progress. I haven't done a proper comic in a while, so I'm relearning everything a bit. Hopefully it's starting to look well. Again, only a test page to try my hand at things.

No.24671
>>24667>>24668
Cue 80s training montage...

No.24673
>>24671

YOU'RE THE BEST

AROUND

NO ONE'S EVER GONNA BRING YE DOWN

But seriously. I just imagined the princess dropping her stick and running away.

No.24674
>>24665
Well, I agree that the maternal thing is unnecessary, but it isn't meant in a direct "they will raise a kid" way, but in the way that they are making a sacrifice for another person's future. Of course, then I realized living together on a farm isn't really a sacrifice, they actually get everything they want out of things. As for the arranged marriages, I so far have avoided mentioning such a thing, mostly cause it would make her dad look like a dick. With him alive at the end, and the reveal of how he became king (if we go with it) making him appear as nice and likable as possible is important, but as it wasn't really considered 'dickish' back then, it could be hinted at that he's shopping around still.

As I've been working my head around the reasons of the Duke, I realized assassination is also logical if he's unsure if he can take the King in an open war. The Duke probably had a nice, peaceful line before him, while the King and his trusted Captain have successfully waged war (even if the king has settled down quite a bit). I was thinking of some way to have the information about the Duke brought to the King, so you could show the King arrive, army in tow, his battle readiness shown. At the moment (thanks to my brain whirling around after a post-work nap) my idea is that the squire uses one of the Duke's own messenger pigeons to relay the info about her and the princess being captured. Then when the King arrives, the Duke hands him a letter to read and tells him that the Princess is dead, but to beg for mercy, he offers him one of his own sons. The letter of course is from the Princess assuring him of her safety, but telling him this is the plan she has decided upon to avoid war. The land they live on will most likely be in the Duke's realm and worked by the bandits and probably even the would be assassin (who can be shown having to attend to some really crappy job).

In case you wonder "why didn't they just use messenger birds to ask for the Duke's help, instead of sending an envoy?", well, that's easy. They assume that the birds are getting intercepted by the bandits (which is both a false assumption and makes the bandits appear like total badasses) when in actuality the Duke is ignoring the messages and hoping his henchmen will carry out the plan.

>>24660
As for the adventure aspects of things, there are at least 3 action packed scenes for fighting and escaping and all that in the mix, and alot of falling in love, so I think it still fits the bill nicely in it's current concept. I'm thinking of having just the Princess and Squire traverse the forest to the Duke's castle after the initial fight with bandits and separation from the others, instead of a stop at a village. Mostly cause it makes they can still prolong their trip due to bandit patrols on their own, and it means less characters to introduce. They can still find an abandoned (perhaps during the war) barn, for the love scene (followed by the second fight with bandits. Since there are no villagers to help them at the last second, I think a set up involving the Princess almost falling in a covered up well before they find the barn would work. Then when Squire is injured, the princess can fight a bit, but then when she is outnumbered, she runs, jumps over the area she knows the well to be, and challenges them to face her (they would naturally pursue and leave the Squire). When they charge, they fall comically into the well, alive but trapped. This will hopefully allow an even stronger focus on the girls taking charge of the situation. Also, I think it was a suggestion at one time to have the princess help the Squire learn to/improve her reading/writing. That would help come into play when she uses the messenger bird. Basically, as many times as we can show them doing alot thanks to something the other taught them, the better we show how their relationship improves them both.

No.24675
File: 127109475827.jpg-(81.50KB, 714x606, princessxsquirerandom01.jpg)
24675
>>24673
A little something random for you.

No.24681
>>24675

Oh goddamnit I just d'awwed my freakin' head off

>>24674

Okay, I get the maternal thing you're going after. It makes sense. Sorry, I'm still wrapping my head around the bulk of the story. As for the King appearing dickish, he's largely going to appear that way for HOW he does it. You can make him a sympathetic character even doing these-- as we see it-- rather bullheaded things. People aren't going to question arranged marriages so much, as long as it's handled right. If the Princess knows her father's intentions prior to any decision being made, it softens the blow. Then again, you could outright toss any mention of it out and the story can survive unhindered.

That's an interesting dynamic; The Duke from a peaceful family attempting treachery, while the King is the polar opposite. I'm not sure how you'd handle the carrier pigeon section [why wouldn't the Duke read the message, exactly?], and I'm worried how soon this could come up, but that can be worked through.

You want to be careful that they don't fall for each other so quickly; if it's too easy, it becomes a little boring. There definitely needs to be that instance of the tables turning between the two, as the Squire is obviously aiding and teaching the Princess for the first few legs of the trip, while the second is the Princess essentially using all that she's learned on the trip, as well as her own knowledge and skills, to help the Squire along while she recovers. It's probably during this time that we start seeing the Princess wearing more common clothing, her hair is less perfectly done, and she starts forcing herself to do things she would otherwise be disgusted out of doing. So, you've definitely got the right idea. I'm not sure how I feel about teaching the Squire to read or write, though. I've seen it as a gag so often that it's hard for me, personally, to take it seriously. It can be done correctly, but man it could come off as silly.

No.24727
File: 127119636238.png-(405.31KB, 800x1035, test-page-2-of-infinity-with-inks-and-bg.png)
24727
After a day's break or so, here're some backgrounds.

... I really want to see this in color. But this is all to test the drawing aspect, get my workflow refined a bit. I can't believe I have to relearn how to draw trees. OH WELL. Sally forth.

No.24737
File: 127121486163.png-(403.43KB, 800x1035, 001-sketch.png)
24737
Alright, I've started on page 1. I'll be going back to my test page for any other tricks I need to learn, but I'm fairly satisfied with the layout for this one. Let me know what you guys think. Not sure about the visual flow; seems to read well to me, but I could always use some advice. Gonna stick to sketches of the other pages before I move on to the inking.

No.24738
>>24737
If you could see my face, you would probably be afraid of the absurd grin of joy I am displaying. Simply stunning.

I have an old friend I am trying to talk into the coloring, I'll see what I can do. He's a bit busy with a baby popping out of his wife any day now (my bet is in 4 days) so we'll see. Didn't get much done today, but I hope to make up for it tomorrow. Going to try to have a full outline of the story, so we can see how it all flows, what we like/don't like, and expand or cut it as needed.

No.24739
File: 127121579558.png-(280.48KB, 1090x644, pagenumbersetup.png)
24739
>>24738

Glad you like it. Don't worry, I've had that same grin before, I can handle it.

Does he have any stuff online we can see? Mostly curious more than anything else.

Also, <-- is an idea I had for the page count at the bottom of the page, right in the center. I'm still working on the design. It'll be fairly tiny, but I think it might be a pretty cute detail. What do you think?

No.24753
>>24727>>24737>>24739
I really like these.

No.24754
What about having them doing something really knighly, followed immediately by something really girly like a tea party?
Hell, combining both would be priceless.
Tea time in full armor?

No.24770
>>24754

For the main comic, I'm not sure where that can be fit in...

... As promo images, I see boundless opportunities... Hmmm.

No.24777
The princess needs to give her a present, something of emotional value, maybe an amulet.
It would also make a nice scene.

No.24779
>>24777

I actually had this thought, but wasn't sure about it... At least there's more than one person thinking it. Just not sure what it could be.

No.24780
>>24779
Her dead mother's crucifix?

No.24781
>>24780

Depends on how much of a stake the Princess's mother has to the character. And would it be in the Princess's personality to give something like that away?

No.24782
Actually, way I see it, if it's a given item... I don't see it as something being all that weighty, emotionally, at least not initially. An innocuous item, something that would remind them of when they first crossed paths.

No.24783
>>24782
Yeah, that works for me

No.24787
>>24782
... I guess that apple won't last the whole story...

As I'm hammering away at the outline (mostly alot of copy and paste with little edits), anything I should try to work in that hasn't been talked about much yet?

No.24792
>>24787
Some sort of villain?

No.24793
>>24787

Heheh. It doesn't even have to be an item, per se. It could just be a simple act, one that's repeated in some significant, though subtle, way.

As for details to throw in, someone posted the stuff we had so far in /co/, and a lot of people seemed excited about throwing in various characters like Dante, Joan of Arc, and so forth into it. I'm still not sold on the idea, since what jokes there are wouldn't really be toward the setting, which referential material would naturally lead to. People wanted to know the names of the characters, whether or not the horse would play a significant role in the story, who the "villain" was [disregarding the fact that there are other forms of conflict outside of man vs man, including man vs environment and man vs self], things like that. Personally, I'm not seeing too much point in a very strict antagonist throughout the story, though I suppose a horse would be a good fit for at least the first leg of the journey. I think we'd all still like names for the Squire and Princess, if only to have other ways of referring to them.

I can't think of much else, honestly. We'll see what we come up with once the outline hits.

No.24801
>>24793
Okay, I think the horse is a fun element that I cut earlier, but would love to add back in. Still agonizing a bit about if they should stop in a village for a while, and if there would be a real point to it. Going a pure forest route, there is alot of room for adventure and beautiful scenery. Also, old forgotten areas overgrown since the war is a subtle way of referring to the past. The bandits will have to have a few key character. I'll probably just toss everything and the kitchen sink in the first pass, and rely on cutting out anything that is wasteful.

As for the villain, and another reason I am probably leaning the way I am on the end, I remember the Siskel and Ebert review of Edward Scissorhands. I know, but stick with me a sec, this is relevant. They basically loved the film, but felt it was frustrating that at the end, like most films, they felt someone had to die. I am not saying it isn't appropriate at times, but this isn't really the type of story that needs it.

I just went insane with a flash on inspiration. Why trust the Duke so much? Cause his wife should be the princess's aunt on her mother's side! I was already thinking about how the mother would feel about the exchange of sons (and while I considered having her die in child birth, it seemed cliche). I think having the Princess present the plan to her would assure her it was acceptable, especially as she would be happy that the King had raised a girl who reminded her so much of her dear sister. This also explains why the Duke would have to be extra secretive about any incoming messages, as he couldn't let his wife know of his plan. I'm feeling fired up now, I think I can make this all work!

No.24803
>>24801

A village pitstop wouldn't be a horrible idea. Plain and simple, a place to sleep that isn't in the middle of the forest would be ideal. Take the kitchen sink approach, since we're gonna have a lot more to work with once we start removing the fat. We want these two to see the world around the path, not just the path itself.

Actually, just because it's crossed my mind... Just a brief look into the future, where would we want this to go? Webcomic it once we have a big stockpile of these things? Try to run it as print? I mean, if this turns out well, I'd love to have a physical copy sitting on my shelf or something.

No.24805
>>24803
Well, I didn't want to get ahead of myself, but I would love to see it printed. Course webcomics can be printed, but I'd love to just do it as a long graphic novel. I wrote a (unfinished) webcomic long ago with breaks every 5 pages, which was interesting but not really something that would work here. Though if there are natural spots for a 'chapter' break, those are cool. Any idea how many pages you think would be appropriate?

No.24806
>>24805

The advantage of a webcomic is that you can make it last pretty much as long as you want. A graphic novel, on the other hand, could be anywhere from 60 to 200 pages or longer.

I don't know how you intend to write it, so I'm not sure about chapter breaks. It's not an immediate concern, since the script is still in writing. If it were me, I'd say chapters could last anywhere between twenty to forty pages, standard issue fare. Once we have a full story outline and we can get an estimate for how long this thing is, we can make some firmer guesses on all that. I'm just making some very general plans, seeing a big picture for the fun of it.

No.24808
Sounds good. I am considering finding a way to work in a bear chase, just cause I consider people running away from bears to be hilarious. I should have a nice long post of ideas sorted out tomorrow, and then I get get working on layouts and scripts again.

No.24809
>>24808

... I will fight tooth and nail to have a bear chase.

That might be the next page I work on, actually.

No.24810
>>24809
I'm probably off to bed in a sec, but I will mention one thing. My old idea for the fight with bandits that the squire is injured in was that it would follow the love scene and lead directly into the climax at the Duke's castle. Now sure why I thought that, but it was probably for space reasons. Now I see that having the fight lead to the princess being able to take more care of the squire, and that in turn leading to the love scene makes more sense. Mostly cause now the idea is for a badass squire on the loose-gotta-find-her-princess action scene at the castle means the injury fight isn't the last bit of action. Ideas are flowing though, I just have been up too long today.

No.24811
>>24810

It WOULD be kind of awesome for an injured Squire to still be able to hack her way through an entire castle...

No.24829
Princessxsquire basic outline, draft 2

*Princess, alone, enjoying a quiet time in a field
*The assassination attempt on the King, crossbow bolt. Deflected by Captain of the guard, knights on alert.
*Assassin flees, knocks over Princess. She sees his face
*King and Captain having formal conversation on matter, King most concerned with his daughter's safety. Knights dismissed. King and Captain continue, much less formally. King wants his daughter protected, suggest the Captain's 'son'. Explains his fatherly concerns.
*Squire arrives, talked about and greeted by others. Seen only in bits or silhouette.
*Princess talking to maid brushing her hair, about her concerns and worries about having a fulltime bodyguard.
*Maid tells her that the Captain's son will surprise her, Squire appears.
*Captain and King talking about the plain to get aid, pan outside to Princess and Squire talking.
*1-2 pages of talking, ends with Captain approaching them.
*2 pages, flipping between father/daughter conversations between the girls and their respective dads. King is making quips about potential husbands he’s been scouting around for, Captain is egging Squire on as she does a jumping mount of her horse
*Conversation with King trails into next page, overlaying scenes of the group starting the journey. Problem with messenger birds, info about the duke and his wife explained.
*Cute talk between the squire and princess, perhaps squire warning her of some mild hazard like poison ivy or such.
* Bandits attack. Squire should be an impressive, but very unconventional fighter. Not needed that she scores many kills, incapping and entangling enemies to escape is fine. During fight, princess either falls from a cliff, or is taken away on a run away wagon she sought shelter on. Eitherway, Squire is the only one able to get to her, and they are separated from the group.
*Sneaking about, show that they can’t take the main route due to bandits.
*Bandit patrol close, the girls must seek shelter until they pass.
*With the main routes blocked, they decide on a longer route through the old trails of the forest. Comical hunting scene, possibly involving a bunny or wild pig with an arrow in its ass. I’m kinda seeing the princess yelling “I have it!” and then just ending up with only the arrow in hand saying “I do not have it.”
*The princess upset by the whole situation. Squire unsure how to cheer her up. Comes back with a big batch of wild flowers. Princess cheers up, knows exactly what to do. Despite squire’s protest, princess braids flowers into the squire’s hair, ala >>12460
*BEAR CHASE!
*teach Princess how to defend herself.
*camp under the stars, bonding and talking. Princess wonders about her future, Squire gives her a few compliments. This could possibly be moved up, and added to by a camp scene at this point that ALMOST results in a kiss.
*Bandit attack, big fight, squire is injured and princess must trick the bandits to save her. During the fight lots of using the area (perhaps an old ruined fort) to advantage, and probably make it a rotted floor that falls directly into a small dungeon. Princess will hold her own for a bit with the sword, but will be disarmed before she leads them into the trap.
*peaceful village rest time. Bandits are arrested so kids can throw delicious tomatoes at them. Princess worried sick for Squire, Squire very proud and relieved that the princess was able to manage on her own. Perhaps jokes that “Guess you don’t really need me anymore!” to which the princess will say that she’s very, very wrong.
*Squire tries to rush, but princess insists she rest. Still working on details, but love scene will be around here. Squire will agree to wait a little bit longer.
* I kinda wanted a cute page where the Princess is jealous after seeing the Squire talking to a boy, and the Squire quickly picks up on it and comforts her. (old idea, left in as the kitchen sink)
*Try to question dimwitted bandits, but they know little. Make it clear they are pretty much uneducated brutes doing it cause it’s basically the only life they know. The big one will be rather happy not having to run around in the forest doing the bandit thing.
*Set off, with provisions from the village. Not actually sure which kingdom the village should be part of. I think if it’s part of the Duke’s land, it would be better.
*Arrive at Duke’s castle, told they are expected. Princess is thankful, Squire is suspicious (how can they expect us if they haven’t been getting our messages…)
*Trap is sprung, several guards surround them with crossbows, lead by the assassin. Unsure what is best, for the Squire to get captured as well, or only the Princess to be captured while the Squire eludes them (which would upset her greatly and make her feel as though she failed her princess). Of course that would be very Dark-Phoenix-Sage-Wolverine-fighting-hellfire club.
*either way, squire has to kick ass all the way to her Princess. Mostly ‘light’ takedowns, like knocking out guys, tripping them off ledges into barrels and such. Squire will see the messenger bird roost (or whatever it’s called) and see a bit of paper under the torch that will show their messages have been arriving and immediately burned. She sends off a message of her own.
*Squire reaches Duke, Princess and he are sitting for tea, he has explained a bit about what he did (the assassin, the bandits) to the princess on the previous page. Squire holds sword to him immediately, enraged. He explains his reason being his newborn sons will grow to war on eachother if he doesn’t expand his land enough to leave them both a kingdom, due to the example he saw in the Princess’s own father.
*Princess is angry at the Duke, but knows the only other way to have what he wanted was most likely open war. After their time in the village, and the ruins they saw along the way, she would hate to bring war to the land, but sees that with the truth revealed there is little choice. She asks to speak to her aunt, the Duke is hesitant since she is still weak, and he doesn’t want her to know of his plan. The girls insist, saying that the time for him to be making decisions on this matter is over.
*King and Captain arrive, ready to lay siege to the castle. Duke confronts, hands not, claims princess is dead and that he begs forgiveness. Captain readies to strike him down, but King (mostly through the letter) stops him. “Your actions have cost me my only daughter, duke. What justice can you give me” This is when the Duke presents one of his sons, to be given to the King to raise as his own. Long silent pondering, the King accepts and orders all men (including a very angry Captain) back to the castle.
*Captain demands to know why, King gives him the letter, the words of which overlay the next scene.
*Show princess talking to the aunt. Aunt will be shocked by her husbands actions, and sad that she sees the sacrifice that must be made. Princess knows she won’t get in the way of the line of succession for either boy (her heart belonging to no man) but agrees she should appear dead so there is not confusion, and so she won’t be a political target ever again. The aunt feels safe giving her son to the King, knowing he raised a girl so very much like her own sister.
*Years later, the king and captain take a detour after visiting the Duke, into a small village where the bandits can be seen working. They seem pretty content, save the would be assassin, who is carting around shit. Perhaps have him injured in the Squire’s RAMPAGE so as to help emphasis he is no longer a threat, just a jerk. They ask to see their master, and are directed to the princess, doing some minor farm chore with delight. They have a friendly conversation, she offers them some of the produce from the farm, and it’s very warm despite them not mentioning they are family. The boy the Duke gave is growing up well, he seems to be raised well by the king and in part by the captain. So as not to overshadow the stars, try not to make the King and Captain seem gay for eachother. We can all talk about how obvious it is after though. They leave

*Last page reflects the quite first page, but this time they are together, leading a simple life.

No.24830
>>24829

Y'know what? I dig this. I think you tie up everything pretty well. It's a simple story, not meant to drag on too long, and has no real BAD END. A nice amount of action sequences, decent filler in the middle with the two on their own... I'm definitely giving my approval.

I thought about that jealousy scene after the injury/bandits sequence, actually, and sort of wondered how to deal with it. The ONLY way I can think to justify it is if the Squire does SOMETHING sort of as a gesture of love to prove no jealousy is necessary. It's a scene that can be safely cut, however, with no harm to the story.

Also, I've been drawing horses and bears. I'm not nearly as bad at them as I had previously thought.

No.24834
>>24830
Glad you like it, I'll try to get some more layouts done.

No.24835
>>24834

What I sort of envisioned for the castle scene:

It's obvious that the Squire would, in no way, abandon her princess. More than likely, the Squire would be captured, along with the princess, and put in her own place in the dungeon. She'd find a way out from there [that's where this gets murky], and so goes the rampage [where her wound might cause her a bit of trouble as she ascends].

No.24836
>>24829
Alright, I'll come back and finish reading this

No.24873
My buddy finally emailed me back, is pretty impressed by the scope of the thread here. He's interested, but not sure about committing at the moment since he's about to have his first kid. I'll try to get him to color one of your test pages though. I guess we should keep open to other possible colorists as well. I don't trust myself with coloring yet. I do have to say that worst case scenario, I think your line work can more then stand on its own.

No.24874
>>24873

At least we explore the option. I would love for him to try out the test pages, and if nothing else, I can at least learn a few things from him.

It might be just me being hard on myself, but I'm not sure if my linework can hold up on its own, not without a little work. Of course, I can always just keep practicing [which I've been doing, using a variety of styles].

No.24929
I liked the idea of making references to different myths and legends through the dialogue and little subtle things, as well as Squire getting a new mysterious sword that she found in a lake.

No.24939
Sorry I haven't posted anything new in a few days, been a busy weekend. I'll try to get a few things done this week. Anything particular you'd like me to start on first? Otherwise, I may just jump around a bit.

No.24957
>>24939

More just a question before I get some more done; the original five pages, are we still sticking with exactly those? Or are we expanding things around that scene? Because I'm down for redrawing if your plan is to change them.

No.25022
>>24957
I'm pretty much real happy with them. It still seems the most efficient way to get everyone introduced, and the story doesn't really 'start' until the Princess and Squire meet. So I am pretty much happy with all the current layouts.

No.25027
>>24957
But to clarify, if you have any suggestions, I'm open to them.

No.25029
>>25022>>25027

I only bring it up due to the outline you posted. You stated you were still thinking of extending the initial conversation between the King and Captain to two pages, despite your consolidation in the original layouts. I'm game for whatever, though.

I'll keep working on the sketches of the rest of the layouts, then, but keep in mind they'll likely be reworked in case the dialog doesn't quite fit in the space alloted. Which is perfectly fine by me, as I still really enjoy drawing these characters.

No.25039
>>25029
Oh, that was just ideas I had initially. The current, much shorter conversations between the King and Captain are probably best (though page could be added for pacing if needed) just due to them not being the main characters. I trust your judgement, but feel pretty confident in the very short scenes with their fathers.

No.25040
>>25039

Works for me, then. I'll see if I can knock out a couple of pages tonight. I know I said I was going to do them sooner, but that one little thought of whether they were final or not kept me from doing them, heh. But that obstacle's good and gone.

No.25100
File: 127213744417.png-(1.12MB, 800x1035, testpage.png)
25100
Drawing is more my area of expertise, but I really wanted to take a stab a coloring this page 'cause it looked like alot of fun (and it was).

No.25102
>try not to make the King and Captain seem gay for eachother. We can all talk about how obvious it is after though

Are you saying you can't write dialogue between two men that won't come off as gay?

No.25107
>>25100

Jesus goddamn Christ. Seriously, this is awesome. I love the watercolor feel to it; all the problems I had with some of the inking are just gone with how you pulled this off. I've been cackling like a madman over how good this is.

No.25114
>>25107

Glad you like it! Your lines are really fun to color. Also, I was unsure about their exact color schemes, so I just kind of winged it based off the OP picture

No.25115
>>25114

I'm glad! If my lines are fun to color, that means I'm doing SOMETHING right. And, in all honesty, I think you nailed the color scheme in one go. I know I missed some lines in the background, and I was worried about those two bg-less panels, but you knocked it out of the park.

No.25116
>>25115

I'd be really interested in coloring more pages, if you guys ever need a colorist (and would have me haha)

No.25117
>>25116

Pretty sure Stranger'd be a fool to reject you with that kind of work. I'll see if I can get more stuff done by tomorrow for you so you can try your hand further.

No.25128
>>25102
I will neither confirm nor deny such a thing...

>>25116
>>25117
Mama didn't raise no fool! I might say a lighter/brighter shade of green for the princess, but dat look.... it's perfect! I was really hoping for a more painterly look to it all, and you do an astounding job! I also like the choice you made with the backgroundless panels, as they look a bit like parchment, which I think gives the story just the right feel. Would it be safe to say that we have a team?

No.25129
>>25128

Haha Thank you! Next time around, I'll fix up her shade of green. Also, count me in. I've been following this project since the thread started and I'm happy its actually picking up.

No.25137
>>25129>>25128

oh god i'm so happy i could plotz

No.25143
As for secondary characters, would you rather I take a pass at designs for them, or do you have ideas for most of them so far? If I do get around to a few design suggestions, I'll post them.

No.25144
>>25143

The king and captain I've got ideas for. The rest, not so much.

No.25146
I could doodle up some ideas for the Duke if you wanted. I kind of have a vague image of him in my head

No.25148
>>25146

I personally wouldn't mind, in all honesty.

No.25150
File: 127224394127.png-(263.69KB, 1455x979, 0006bgq0.png)
25150
Drew up some designs, this is the only one I really liked though. Really rough, but wasn't going for detail. I really like how Spanish dukes would wear those furs over their shoulders. Also, after reading all the info here, I couldn't really picture the Duke looking... fierce, I guess? I see him as looking really tired, probably from all the crap he's worried about/been doing.

No.25153
>>25150

I like it. I'll probably end up tweaking either his design or the Captain's [their hairstyle and facial hair are somewhat similar], but that's sort of the direction I was heading in.

No.25155
>>25150
Thats pretty cool, although I sort of imagined him less manly looking.

No.25162
>>25150
You know what's funny? I also pictured a bit of a beard, though perhaps not quite as full. Slimmer perhaps, and a smoother trim on the beard, but I like it overall. The tired aspect is a most interesting one, as he has no doubt been worried about his schemes and his sons.

No.25203
Oh, by the way, my DA is cginator.deviantart.com, if you need to get in touch with me for whatever reason. Its got my other contact info on it too.

No.25226
File: 127242074081.jpg-(680.83KB, 1250x1288, Arthur Hazel 10.jpg)
25226
The talk about King Arthur remind me of something...

No.25244
>>25203

You've got some pretty cool stuff. I'm still adoring your colors, though.

>>25226

I freaking love that comic...

Also, sorry I haven't been uploading more. Exams just hit for the semester, and there's just ONE class I'm fighting to survive in. If I can figure out how to make a simple Java game with a save state and somewhat functional AI, I'm set. But... That's not very likely. After Monday, though, my free time shoots through the roof.

No.25300
File: 127267232523.png-(623.92KB, 1003x1409, 0006fxqf.png)
25300
Been in a horrible art rut lately, but doodled these a few days ago, so I slapped some color on 'em

No.25333
>>25300
I really like it, and your art style.

Squire looks more like a guy than usual, but I guess thats the point.

No.25335
File: 127282918546.jpg-(39.56KB, 640x360, jeanne d\'arc.jpg)
25335
Have they fought Jeanne d'Arc yet?

No.25345
>>25300
It is great looking stuff! Sorry I haven't been around for a few days, things have been busy here as well. I'll try to have the layouts for the next page all done and posted soon though, and just get cranking on layouts more and more. Just haven't been finding my energy in the mornings at work, which is when I did all the other layouts.

No.25526
>>25300

I'm growing ever fonder of your work. Though the other poster is correct, you lose that slightest touch of what little feminine quality is in the Squire. That... Takes an inordinate amount of practice, however.

>>25345

I'm still here! Just so you know. My final day of class for the semester is Monday and my teammates for the final project basically dumped all their needs for art assets on me literally about forty eight hours ago. I'm having to burn a couple of midnight oils to get it done. After that, I'm going to crack down on getting work done, since I know I've been all but completely absent here.

No.25538
File: 127343691926.jpg-(131.42KB, 1106x821, princessxsquiredraft06.jpg)
25538
Here are pages 10 and 11 layouts. Original idea was King and Princess talking and Captain and Squire talking either interspliced or on separate pages, but both ways not really haven't much to do with eachother. Since the King Princess talk would be more important here (Captain has a bit more time to interact on the first part of the journey) the focus is now that, with the Squire's antics drawing their attention. I'm still not 100% in the swing of things, so I'll just give a rough guide to the layout instead of a very detailed script.

Page 10
-Panel 1: Soldiers in fore are commenting on how the Captain's son is going to go for it and they should check it out. King is wishing his daughter wouldn't worry so, and makes first mention of how she will be making the journey to the Duke's lands.
-Panel 2: Captain is telling his son how he could do this stuff in his sleep when he was her age. Conversation with King continues in background.
-Princess very worried, but king interrupts her and draws her attention to her "champion".

Page 11
-Squire hops on horses back, king is much pleased while princess isn't very impressed. Everyone cheers on the Squire.
-Panel 4: Princess makes some comment to the effect that if the King is so impressed by her, maybe the Squire should be his bodyguard instead, which gets quite the laugh from her father.
-Panel 5: Captain is begrudgingly impressed by his son, but tells her to keep her focus on the mission ahead. This will lead into narration in the next page.

No.25543
>>25538

There is absolutely no reason why the "and that's how I broke my hymen" should be in the comic.

All the same, I fucking lol'd. Hard.

Loving the layouts so far. Hoping I can get started tonight if I'm not burned out on drawing yet.

No.25560
>>25543
Yeah, I'll admit, that line is purely for our benefit. I can't wait to see more of your stuff, and I'll try to keep the fires going on my end of things.

No.25568
>>25560

You realize, of course, I'm going to make a meme image, where the Squire says that line to the princess, with the panel preceding it being completely exploitable, right?

No.25578
File: 127346879041.png-(126.98KB, 638x987, HowIBrokeMyHymenExploitable.png)
25578
Too late. Have fun, people.

No.25587
Thanks to you, I have something hilarious to brainstorm over all day at work.

No.25605
File: 127352573996.jpg-(166.04KB, 1103x850, princessxsquiredraft07.jpg)
25605
Okay, another layout! No text on page 12 except the Captain explaining the basic route, their concerns and such on the path. Page 13, panel 2 is just a warning to the princess that she probably doesn't want to do that. Panel 3 Squire explains that that flower is poisonous or something, and then she presents her with a better, less itch inducing flower that she cuts down from above. Figured giving her a flower is a nice gesture, and here it's a nonromantic one. Also, the first page established that the princess loves flowers. I know, holy heck, how did I think of such a unique personality trait??? It's a gift, I tells ya! Anyway, it should also add even more to the final gesture in the last page of giving her a flower. Even with the "get me that apple thing" this is important because it is the first unasked for gift, which the ladies will always tell you they appreciate more.

Pardon my inability to really draw horses at all, and panel 3 on page 12 (the horses at the stream) being so terrible looking, my pen was running out of ink. I did do one of those images you did here >>25578 but saving it til I have a minor thing to say that won't be accompanied by a layout.

No.25607
>>25578

Oh my god yes

No.25608
File: 127353517194.jpg-(181.27KB, 638x987, HowIBrokeMyHymenMecha.jpg)
25608
I guess I can post just one, but I'm saving my others til I have more random stuff to say about the project!

No.25612
>>25608

I don't know if I'm more amused by the thought of someone using an exploitable I made, or by the image itself. It's pretty neck-and-neck at the moment.

>>25605

Also, for some reason, really looking forward to these pages.

No.25615
>>25608
lol, awesome, just awesome

No.25620
File: 127354472177.png-(465.46KB, 638x987, HowIBrokeMyHymenMoon.png)
25620
... These are really fun...

No.25638
File: 127357194667.png-(243.38KB, 800x1035, 001.png)
25638
Hey, guess what? Finally buckled down and knocked out a page. Looks like inking takes me roughly an hour and a half on a page with medium detail like this one. Could be up to three for some of the busier ones, but I haven't accounted for some of the weird tablet glitches I had while trying to work. I'll get to the layouts for the next four or five pages, and start inking those after that.

By the by, Eli, would you like the original PSDs to work with, rather than the PNGs I've been uploading? It's 8.5x11 at 300DPI, a good, solid size to work at, and gives us a high resolution to work with for whatever extracurricular purposes we might have if and once the project's wrapped up. Figure one good way to handle all this is to set up a Google Site and just put the files on there, deleting older ones once we start running out of space.

No.25642
File: 127358801358.jpg-(143.99KB, 638x987, HowIBrokeMyHymentrapcard.jpg)
25642
>>25638
Bitchin', boss and cool. My only concern is my might like her expression more in your sketch from before. Not that I don't like it here, just part of me thinks I might like the other one a bit more. I'll sleep on it, pray, browse /u/ and all those other things I do when I need guidance. No layouts today, just cause I was unsure what to start with next. I considered having them settled in to camp, but figure I'll just have them on the road more and lead into the bandit attack. Just gotta get around to planning it out.

Not sure if this one is cheating, cause the first part is already hilarious.

No.25651
File: 127360654116.png-(243.33KB, 800x1035, 001.png)
25651
>>25642

So, you mean more like this? I had some of the same concerns, which is why I went ahead and poked at it, see if I could get it closer to the sketch. You're talking specifically about that third panel, right?

[Second time I posted this... would be nice if I remembered to not upload the page WITH the sketch layer still on]

No.25652
File: 127360732378.jpg-(123.76KB, 638x987, HowIBrokeMyHymensteampunk.jpg)
25652
>>25651
Yes, that exactly!

No.25653
>>25652

Ah, excellent, then!

... Also, that image makes even MY hymen hurt. And I don't even have one.

No.25661
>>25651

HEE This looks wonderful. As for the file type, either one works fine for me, with the only difference being that the PSD might allow me to add in some more details. I'm pretty used to work with PNGs though, so like I said, I'm good with whichever.

No.25662
>>25661

Hey, any extra detail is beneficial. Besides, I would really like to see what you can do when you have a little extra room. If nothing else, I could always upload a high resolution .PNG for you!

No.25663
>>25662

I can work with both! I'm itching to get started on this new page, so the PSD or the high resolution PNG would be great!

No.25665
File: 127362778455.png-(1.63MB, 2550x3300, 001-hr.png)
25665
>>25663

Eeeexcellent. Well, either way, here's a high resolution PNG for you.

Yeah, I work large.

No.25666
>>25665

Haaaa that's what she said. Ok, gonna get started on this

No.25667
>>25665
Wait a minute... since when do roses grow out of the ground all on their lonesome?

No.25668
>>25667

Since just now!

Yes, that'd been bothering me for a while. But roses are REALLY hard to draw...

No.25669
>>25668

Actually, now that I think about it, fairly certain I had the problem of only looking at the details of the layout rather than making sure the elements within the panels made sense. Making what was there work rather than making sure it makes sense, so I never even thought to question it.

Apparently, though, it is possible to grow a rose bush from a single cutting. Maybe the Princess picked that one cutting, not thinking someone was trying to get a rose bush to grow there?

[makes note to self to come back to this particular page a few weeks from now]

No.25671
>>25667
I'm no botanist, so I'm going to say MAGIC, and leave it at that.

Darn, I'll need to make a few more 'hymen' images for the future. Loving that high resolution, and can't wait to see it colored!

No.25674
>>25671

I think it's going to annoy me until I go back to fix it, but it's taken me so long to finally get started that I don't want to lose momentum by getting anal about a single page. I'm sure this is gonna happen to me again, so I might just make a list of pages I'd like to rework and just... go back to them another time.

No.25677
>>25674
You can fix it if you want, but the lone, uniqueness of it is also a striking image. I suggest sleeping on it, praying, browsing /u/, etc. and enjoying working on other parts. But I'm also unsure, as a fuller rose bush might be the way to go. What do you think, Eli?

No.25678
>>25677

Suddenly, I am very curious if this will be our last discussion on the fullness of any kind of bush before this comic project is over.

No.25679
>>25678
...well played, friend. Well played.

No.25685
>>25677

Now that someone's brought it up I can't stop thinking about it either. I agree that the uniqueness of it adds to it, but yea not really sure what we should do. I'm not very far from being done with the coloring, if you want to wait and see before deciding. The way I'm doing the colors also makes the rose stand out more, for better or worse.

No.25686
>>25678

I laughed wholeheartedly

No.25689
>>25685

Actually, with help from a friend, I think I have a workaround that'll be good and easy.

Here's what I'm told: By and large, most roses are Asian in origin. That particular rose wouldn't be around there in that era. In fact, the roses of the European landscape would actually be fairly flat-looking, the rosa rubiginosa: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rosa_rubiginosa

I'm getting some help with an equally iconic flower that grows individually. I'm also going to add a few things to the page, it's minimal edits. If you're working in a separate layer, Eli, this basically means you can still do a majority of the work. Nothing gets lost in the process.

No.25690
>>25689

Alright, that works for me! I'll continue with what I'm on then and switch it out when I get the changes

No.25692
>>25690

For the sake of visual variety, I miiiight add the tree back into the first panel just because that's also bugging me. And a few more flowers in the field. But those shouldn't be much to paint over, I would think.

No.25693
>>25692

Naw, go ahead. Those would be simple to color over, so do which ever you think works best.

No.25694
Cool, sounds like things are well in hand then. I'll now curl up in my father's coffin... er, perfectly normal bed.

No.25695
Found one! White Madonna Lilies. Native to the Balkans and West Asia, it actually winds up in a few Medieval manuscripts as decorative flowers. They're a little stereotypical, but they work very well for this particular story.

I also found a few other reasons for going after lilies specifically. I'll get to work on this as soon as I can. [Maybe I'm taking some of this research too seriously. Oh well. The story will be the better for it.]

No.25696
>>25695

Good choice! Their beautiful. Haha lilies in a story about lesbians.

No.25698
They're* my bad jdksladjsklad

No.25703
Well, I was considering getting some flower research in, but if you have it handled then I can focus on other things, so it's much appreciated. In fact, anythings you'd like me to look into research pics of and such? Thanks again.

No.25722
>>25665
Oh man, this is looking really good already

Keep up the good work.

No.25752
File: 127382549462.png-(5.78MB, 2295x2970, 4234.png)
25752
Ok, here's whats colored to far. Left the rose greyed out while waiting for Anderjak's changes. Let me know if there's anything you'd want changed when I finish it up.

No.25755
>>25752
I guess I'm going to be useless a while, as now my entire plan for the day is to roll around on the floor in a joyous fit of happiness. I'm sure I'll bump into a lot of things.

Truly astounding, the brush work in the grass gives the perfect feel. Keep being awesome, and thank you, both of you.

No.25774
>>25752

Also, I'm holding back my enthusiasm for how good this page looks so far. I can't replace this keyboard if I were to somehow be too overjoyed.

Damn laptops.

No.25777
File: 127389820172.png-(1.86MB, 2550x3300, 001-hr.png)
25777
Don't mind me, just fixing some linework.

No.25788
Wouldn't let me post unless I resized it, and I didn't want to mess with it, so the finished page is here:

http://pics.livejournal.com/rampagingwalter/pic/0006qy83

No.25789
File: 127391245811.png-(1.02MB, 800x1035, 001c.png)
25789
>>25788

Amazing job, dude. This is really working out so far.

Ladies and gentlemen, I guess this is our first completed page. I'll see about having another page done before tomorrow night.

>>14269

By the by, Stranger, since we're now hitting dialog, is all the dialog for these layouts finalized? And are we still doing a focused shot of the assassin on the third page? I know you had some questions about whether or not to make that a focus. Personally, I'm fine with sticking to our guns up to this point.

No.25793
>>25789
Beautiful! And yes, looking back I am sure of the layouts and dialog. Just realized I didn't really finalize dialog in ANY of the other pages past 3, so I'll try to take a go at that in a bit so it's all ready (and can be refined if needed).

No.25809
>>25793

Take your time. I'm still shoving aside time to do the revised layout. Also, once I get the layouts put out, you'll be able to see all the dialog, so you can see for yourself if everything works.

Also also! Both Stranger and Eli, do you mind terribly if I post the low-res version of page one on my deviantart? I've been posting a little bit of the project there, mostly the B&W test page and the first pass at the inks of page one.

And, since we're on the subject: http://Anderjak.deviantart.com <- Not much more than what's on /draw/, but I'm slowly adding to it.

No.25813
>>25809

I don't mind at all c: also, watchin' you

No.25868
I don't mind one bit, I was thinking of asking you if I could post the low res on any of my stuff to show people how the comic is coming along as well.

No.25870
>>25868

Looks like we're all in agreement, then, to just post where we need to. I say go ahead and do whatever.

No.25936
Man, page two is gonna be tricky. It's a little cramped, and I think I might spread it out into two pages, leaving the dialog pretty much unchanged. I'd like to see if I can get the king and captain just a touch more screen time, with the arrow flying by the end of the second page... We'll see how it turns out. I'll make an extremely rough pass at it, post it here when I reach a result I'm satisfied with.

No.25937
File: 127400532566.png-(487.61KB, 800x1035, 002-wip1.png)
25937
Alright, here's my proposed second page change. One of the problems I had was that there was simply not enough room to allow for the king's introduction. In comparison to the page before it, it would be a bad idea to cramp things so suddenly. I attempted to add just a little bit of an establishment of the King and Captain, since they don't get much face time in the original layout. I'll have the third page soon, but these next two pages, if we do indeed decide to turn page two into a two-page thing, will be very difficult to do. I may leave this one behind and work ahead on some of the easier pages so there's at least something to work on [only like one or two pages ahead].

Also, we get a better glimpse of my take on the Captain in the fourth panel. The second part of this scene, I'm really hoping to capture a bit of dynamicism. We'll see how it works out.

No.26018
File: 127409277026.png-(568.18KB, 800x1035, 003-wip1.png)
26018
... And here's the third page. I'm starting to really feel these. Gonna make sure I get the horses at least reasonably proportioned and fix them a bit, since I've actually never drawn a horse's whole body before [like you couldn't tell]. These sketches are actually good enough to lay the inks on, so apart from any fixes, I'm almost done.

Just let me know if there are any objections to these pages. I'll start on the inks once I hear the go-ahead, and work on layouts for the next page until then.

No.26023
>>26018
This one looks perfect.

>>25937
For expanding this out I had a bit of an idea, which I'll scan soon and post. I have an idea for having them all out visiting the queen's grave, which will help give more insight into the king. Also thinking of changing the princess to holding several flowers by the time the would-be assassin runs into her, as she was gathering the most beautiful ones for her mother's grave. If you're fine with it, I'm also considering expanding the one page conversation the King and Captain have later into a 2 page to maintain the pace a bit longer, and set up some plot points for later so the information at the end isn't as jarring. I think I'm still happy with the pacing of the other pages, as things are fine for picking up quite a bit once the Squire is introduced.

No.26040
>>26023

So far, I'm fairly happy with the rest of the layouts. One or two might be a little tight, but they don't quite match the width of the page size I work with anyway. I'm also definitely happy with the idea of visiting the Queen's grave. It makes the Princess seem less like she's just an aloof girl just picking flowers 'cuz they're pretty.

No.26041
>>26040>>26023

Visiting the grave sounds perfect. Like Anderjak said, it really adds more to the princess too

No.26045
File: 127412960971.jpg-(52.93KB, 542x798, princessxsquiredraft02page2redo.jpg)
26045
Here it is, though I know it's rough and understand any changes you think are best here.

First panel is him talking about how the princess has grown so fast, second is a joke about how soon he'll be marrying her off. Perhaps silent for panel 3 and 4, and back to the old dialog from there. Not sure yet what to name the Queen, and I guess we'll have to make a final decision on if the princess and squire need names. I think the dads need names, and the only one I can think of is Roland or something, and not even sure which one to give that too. Maybe I'll do some name research later.

As for a name for the whole thing, since I'm taking this stuff out of my general project folder into it's own, I've thought of calling the folder "Flowers in Bloom". Not sure how that will fly with you guys, but for now that what I'll refer to it to... well, myself. No rush on a final name though.

No.26046
>>26045

I'll get some layout work done soon. Not entirely sure how to do everything, since I'd really like that establishing shot of the King's entourage, so to speak. For some reason, I'm really stuck on that somewhat gradual reveal of the assassin. Then again, I'm a fan of slower pacing. We'll figure it out.

Flowers in Bloom is an interesting name. We'll see how well it holds as the project continues.

No.26048
>>26045

Oh god. Why am I thinking of adding yet another new page? I had this idea of pacing this page as a wake. The king and group enters a clearing made for a family cemetery. He dismounts and approaches the grave while the rest of the knights in his group spread out and let him have his moment to speak to the late Queen. I also thought of possibly obscuring the tombstone with flowers already laid out, say, by the king himself, a pre-arranged bundle, which obscures the name of the Queen. Just since we keep falling into a lack of names for the characters, and if we want to continue running with that idea.

No.26060
>>26048
I'm down with it if you have a pretty clear idea how you want to do it. I do think the slow reveal on the assassin would add to things, it's just hard getting out of my mode to consolidate that first part as much as possible. I want to have sort of a clash between the serious King and when he is more relaxed. The idea I have is that he really sheltered his daughter from the past and any form of violence (the whole incident worries him more for how it could effect his daughter then his own safety). This is still a distant part of him that remembers what it was like to wage war, to raise arms against his own brother. But I also don't want it to seem that "serious" king is his "true" self. He really is a rather happy and humorous guy, and it's brought out by his daughter (who reminds me so much of her mother). So at his wife's grave, he'll show his serious mourning side a bit, but the lightness of him shines through as well.

In contrast the Captain has stayed as alert as possible since the old days, and raised his daughter as he would a son. In the next section I want to layout I'm wondering if I should have him chastise her for horsing around with another squire OR interrupting her as she starts talking in front of the princess about her father's war stories. Oh well, just some random thoughts I had.

I also picked up 'Same-sex Unions in Premodern Europe' by John Boswell. A friend saw it and I said "Let me see that!" and I figured it would be an interesting read that may (or may not) give me some insight I can use in the comic (might not have much as the author admits in the intro that there is alot less info on female-female unions). Eitherway, I'm going to try to devote more time making sure I don't miss anything I can use for inspiration.

No.26061
Also, honestly, I've always been fine with the idea of giving NO ONE a name, and just letting things ride on titles. I don't know if it's silly, pretentious or both, but I consider part of the point is the timelessness of this kind of tale. Even if the details are unconventional, the overarching themes are as classic as they get. Roses without names would smell just as sweet, after all.

No.26062
>>26060

Oh man, now I can't get the image of Squire wrastlin' with another squire out of my head. I love it alot ffff

>>26061

I've always been a fan of names that aren't really names, so i've been pro-title since the beginning.

No.26117
Also, gonna throw my two cents in and say that I think Rose without a Name would be a cool title ffffff

No.26203
File: 12743510124.png-(401.43KB, 1160x834, layout-sketch-pages.png)
26203
Oy. Okay, had a bit of work redoing these, buuuut... Here goes.

Page 2:

Panel 1: King and Captain are seen entering a clearing alongside a few others. This is where the initial dialog happens. "Where's the Princess gotten off to?" or whatever.
P2-4: King dismounts, is speaking to grave, off-panel. Something akin to, "Yet another year's passed. It's good to see you again."
P5: Of course, the grave, flowers left, obscuring the name.
P6: King stands in silence before the grave.

Page 3:
P1-3: This is where it starts looking like Stranger's layout. So you can refer to that.
P4-5: These are meant to establish the location of the captain in relation to the king, and to set up the rustling noise in the bushes. Trying my best to maintain a visual flow here.
P6-9: These are exactly the same as my last layout pass for the second page, before we decided on the purpose of the King and Princess moving around outside.

I might do a small bit of work to the first three panels on Page 2, but this is generally what I'm going to go for. Any comments, please let me know.

And I'm sorry for taking so long with this. I just really want to do this right.

No.26204
Also, I'm slowly narrowing in on what my workflow's going to be. Assuming I actually work on this every day, if I put in about an hour or two, I can do one of: a few pages of layout work, two pages of final roughs, or one page of inks. Inking can take the most time, potentially, though nasty layout work can really throw me for a loop. This means, if I steady my timing and try to keep up a schedule, I could have a new inked page every two or three days. Gonna force myself to push on this.

I personally blame Red Dead Redemption, Alan Wake, and 3D Dot Game Heroes for distracting me.

No.26253
>>26203
>>26204
I like it all quite a bit, you found a solution to alot of the stuff I honestly was at quite a loss on. Enjoy the games though, I know I take to them when I'm unsure of my next move as well. Hell, since I wasn't sure of my next page for this I doodled a few layouts for a Metal Slug thing I want to do. But I'll get back the hard focus as best I can.

No.26262
>>26253

Awesome. I'll continue on with what I have, then. Im shooting for an inked page tonight.

No.26455
Gonna be away for a week, so if I'm alittle inactive within the next few days

No.26465
>>26455

Works for me. I'm having some stuff to deal with. I'm gonna keep plugging away. Might take a slight diversion and do a page of another comic I'm doing to hopefully keep my interest from stagnating.

No.26597
>>26455
>>26465
I'll chime in and mention I have no problem with that. Honestly, right now it's so hot here I can barely think straight half the time, so I probably won't be of much use til I get the air conditioner up and running. Just tell me if you need anything specific and I'll get on it though.

No.26603
oh god, this is so incredible. I am definitely, definitely sticking around. And tomorrow, it looks like this will have been here for an entire year! Huh.

Keep up the amazing work!

No.26666
Alright, back from my trip. Pumped and ready to go. c:

No.26716
Like many others, I too am exited by this project, If not because of the sheer ammount of effort being put into it, and the fact that there's not enough medieval based comics out there.

Also Lesbians

No.26853
HOLY FUCK

I remember the original thread where I suggested that we do a comic, I honestly didn't think anything would come out of it. I left this thread a year ago and thought the project was dead.

Now this thread is ridiculously long (to the point I don't even know exactly what the story is anymore) and we actually have pages done and several more layedout.

This is really amazing, so is the story actually FINALIZED.If not I would like to through out some ideas.

No.26854
So is the ending where the Duke gets his way by having his son rule, and the princess and squire live their lives in poverty and consent to living their lives away from their friends and family...the finalized ending

No.26860
>>25335
Would it be inappropriate to point out that including Jean D'Arc really throws out the possibility of knights, squires, and you know, the whole "Medeival" thing?

No.26868
>>26860
Well, this is historical fiction. The goal is less perfect historical accuracy and more a bitchin' good tale about oldschool lesbians. If timewarping Jeanne makes for a good story element, why not?

Also, this is an amazing project and I salute its participants.

No.26871
>>26868
Why not include timewarped contemporary figures then?

No.26882
>>26854
>and the princess and squire live their lives in poverty and consent to living their lives away from their friends and family...
I'm not sure I'd define having a rather expansive farm with servants and such "poverty". Everyone leaves their family to live their own life at some point, and in this case they do so happily together. I personally would be very happy if my life ends up as peaceful and full of love. The duke doesn't really get his way though, as he doesn't get to raise the son he gives to the king. There is alot of pain in that, even the thought of it kinda makes my heart hurt.

Yeah, it's been a year since that fateful thread, and it's been amazing to see all the ups and downs here. I'm still here, and I'll be here til it's all wrapped up. As far as Joan of Arc though, that girl is more then worthy of her own book. Firing proclamations at the english and crying when they make fun of her, cradling the heads of dying enemy soldiers, jumping from tower windows... she was awesome beyond compare.

No.26886
All the commentary's been extremely uplifting, and at the same time, I'm kicking myself for not being able to get at these pages more quickly.

No.26888
All these comments have put me in the best mood

No.26894
I thought they lived on a farm with some orphans they adopted not servants? Anyway they still leave their family so that the Duke can have his way. I don't know how you plan on showing the Duke ensuring his son will be wealthy they he could have imagined...being painful. The princess is leaving her father and mother and friend and everything she has ever known and doing farming...you said "simple life" when she comes from royalty, I mean relative poverty compared to their lives previously. Squire's father was a knight, and princess father was the queen and they give everything up so the Duke can have exactly what he wanted happen.

If you are committed to having this be the ending, by all means go ahead but I am just saying I don't much care for the resolution.

No.26902
>>26894

Well, think about it. What's the Princess's life when there's a male heir to the throne? She's likely going to be married off in a pre-arranged thing to someone she doesn't really love, live in some other castle, used as what is essentially a bartering tool to gain more influence for the royal family. If she's already in love with someone else, someone who isn't royalty, well, that likely won't fly in the family, no matter how close a friend the Captain is to the King. This way, she earns more than the chance to be in love, and she has a freedom she didn't have before. Mixed with the survival tactics she learns from the Squire over the course of the story, she likely wouldn't be willing to be confined in a castle yet again, as she actually finally got to see just how much of the world she was missing out on.

No.26911
Can we please not just shove in people and things that exist around the time period. I understand the urge to just include as many elements as possible but I really don't see it working well to tell a good story.

Having them just happen by a Sword in a stone or A lady in a Lake, or having them meet every character that could have existed at the time just seems a bit silly. You would be able to tell they were ham-fisted in and were naturally included but simply included because they would be "awesome".

I am not even sure we know what the story is yet and I don;t think we need a check list of "cool things that don't really make sense and are blatantly anachronistic"


I was also thinking that maybe the squire could be hinted at being just as capable as some of the knights around her but not being knighted based on her gender, and maybe at the end making her knighted...or the princess can insinuate or flat out say " you are a knight to me" (only worded better of course). Just to give the character an arc and a sense of accomplishment toward the conclusion.

Also what is there dynamic, do they like each other off the bat or is it a relationship that builds from a sense of unease to trust to love?

Also does the topic of homosexual taboos ever get addressed, do they feel something is wrong with it or resist the feeling they are feeling or is it just something they feel and don't get too neurotic about?

No.26912
>>26902

I thought there wasn't a male heir until the King took in the son of the guy who tried to Murder him. She would have been the queen if she just didn't try and hide and let the Duke have his way.

No.26916
.>>26911
This. Especially with actual historical figures. Because once you do that, you kind of have to pull everything else in with them.
If you add Jean D'Arc then you have to add the Hundred Years Wars. If you add the Hundred Years wars you have to add not only France and England, but Henry the VIII. Her story makes absolutely no sense without those things.
You add in Henry VIII and you've added a whole mess of things that don't mesh at all with the setting.

No.26921
>>26882

This really reminds me of 'Of Mice and Men' and the two main characters ultimate goal, so I think it works.

No.26926
>>26911
>>26916
So I guess what you're saying is that timewarping Jeanne WOULDN'T make for a good story element?

No.26938
>>26911

I agree with this. I wasn't to fond of the idea of adding in actual historic figures. It just adds too much to what was originally supposed to be a simple story.

I do like the idea of Squire not being knighted do to sex, just because of how D'AW that line would be from Princess.

No.26957
>>26938

The idea of the Squire's gender being the barrier between her and being knighted helps establish at least a little bit of reality to it. At least, if it's that known in the royal family what her situation is.

And I've been against historical figures for a while now, in all honesty. We're sticking to a non-specific region, dealing with non-specific figures who may or may not exist. If we start bringing in historical figures, well, that places things, in a very specific time and setting, which doesn't really help the story. It's supposed to have a political backdrop that merely acts as a vehicle for the REAL story of the two main characters, so it needs to be relatively simple and detached from anything we "know" or can research.

Besides, if we want historical references, there're already plenty of comics, webcomics specifically, which already do that.

No.26970
>>26957

Agreed. This comic's purpose, from what I've read, doesn't seem to be OOOOH LOOK HOW INTERTEXTUAL I CAN BE, LOOK LOOK LOOK DID YOU CATCH THE HIDDEN REFERENCES???
It's more to tell an unusual story and flesh out two characters that nobody has ever seen before. Bring in historical figures and the typical "_____ would NEVER do that, it contradicts what he/she did in ___(war/event)___ entirely!!!" reaction that occasionally comes of using established people or characters. It needlessly complicates and the researching would probably pull the handbrakes on getting anything done, which would be terribly sad for everyone who's keeping up with the project.

No.26988
Okay, jumping on the "No historical references!" bandwagon, here... this to me has the feel of a slightly fleshed out fairy tale, and specifics really would only pin down the agelessness of the story.

Also, I'm still a bit uncomfortable with the ending. I suppose it's all in how it gets played out; at the moment I'm getting a "Aww, his story is so sad, and babies are so cute; I guess we have no other option than to give up our quest and retire to the middle of nowhere." If you could make it more of something the girls have been wanting (a quiet place to themselves, not having to deal with politics and assassins and what-have-you) it would feel more like a victory and less like a cop-out. More instances like >>24632 earlier on, for example.

Just my two cents.

No.26993
>>26988

The idea of having them with the want of some sort of freedom is one I like, and one I've been subconsciously having. It looks as though the story IS leaning toward that direction, with the Princess slowly starting to fend for herself, to act on her own terms rather than in want of a bodyguard or protector.

It'd be good to have a little less subtlety on that want, however. A conversation in the middle of the story, when their feelings are consummated. That opens up the discussion fairly well.

No.26994
>>26993
Totally agree that having them wanting some freedom has to be mentioned in the story. As of right now it sounds more like they are settling and accepting their lot in life for the good of the country. It seems kinda sad as is, but if it is mentioned then it seems acceptable.

I am thinking maybe Squire or Princess ask the other if they really have feelings for her or just playing around or just giving in to temptation. Maybe ask if she is just doing this because no one is around and then going to go back to her normal life and duties as soon as she gets the chance.

I like the idea of the Squire being confident in her abilities but unsure about her emotions. While the Princess is more removed from the realities of societies and just feels her emotions, the Squire is fully aware of her place in society and maybe questions if this will actually continue...and they both realize that it can't possibly continue if they go back to life as before.

I was noticing that throughout the thread it was kinda implied that Squire doesn't kill people when she fights, but instead trips them up or just punches them. I don't know that seems kind of silly for a trained warrior, Squire train from like the age of 7 to kill people in combat. I really don't care either way but it just seems weird to shy away from it.

No.26999
I was also thinking we need to develop some quirks and character traits or it is just impersonal, generic, and bland social classes falling in love.

I was thinking that since the Squire was most likely raised and trained around men that she would probably be a little rough around the edges. I was thinking maybe she curses accidentally in front of the princess from time to time, but then remembers she is the princess and apologies for it.

I was thinking that she is a fierce warrior, like she becomes somewhat detached in combat. Resulting from a lifetime of having to surpass the boys just to be seen as equal, so she is an incredible and unrelenting fighter.

For the Princess
I was thinking she would be book smart but not street smart. Like knowing types of flora and fauna...but not knowing how to find north or track people and stuff.

I was thinking she wouldn't curse,until the love making session ;) , be somewhat proper but not annoyingly so.

She could maybe not be as obsessed with class as the Squire and just wants to be treated normally. Though the Squire insist on calling her your majesty


Just throwing out ideas, school is done so I have too much free time on my hands.

No.27005
>>26993
That is a good idea, some mention of wanting that freedom earlier in the story would help alot with setting up things later. Probably sometime while they are camping, before or after the bear chase and all that. Giving in to their feelings obviously feels a bit selfish to them, considering the duties that are expected of them.

To clarify where the story stands at this point, this post is the outline thus far:
>>24829
Any changes to the outline are from the posts below it, as we figured out better ways to streamline, enhance or come at the story from another angle. I'm going to try to get myself harder into this again, I am pretty sure I have a layout I haven't finished around here. The whole historical figures thing is something that I also think would be better served in totally different story. Or we could all watch episodes of Clone High together. That works for me.

>>26994
It probably is silly, but I'm not sure how much killing is okay or not. Since I did originally have the idea of some of the bandits working the farm, I also figured a few of them at least should live through the fights. I guess it also has to do with Joan of Arc's claim that she never killed anyone, and that she 'loved her banner more then her sword'. It is very much a topic open to discussion.

No.27010
>>26994
>>27005

I see the Squire being willing to kill, but wouldn't do it beyond necessity. The one-person castle siege we'd talked about at one point involves the Squire taking out and killing anyone who tries to raise an offending hand against her in order to save the Princess -- who is, unknown to the Squire, kept perfectly safe.

She should be willing to kill. She is not exceptionally unique in her fighting style, really only known for using her lighter build to perform at least a few more unconventional techniques. If someone draws a sword on her, she should be more than willing to strike them down. If they relent mid-battle, surrender themselves, however, she is not the type to take no prisoners. She's honorable, above all else.

As for personality traits, well, we're already seeing a lot of that. The Princess obviously knows a fair amount. She IS educated reasonably well, but her knowledge is largely textbook and, in terms of survival, almost completely useless. The Squire isn't well-read, but IS well-traveled. She fills in the gaps of Princess's knowledge, and vice versa. The Princess is uncharacteristic because she wants to be something people are trying to keep her from becoming. She WANTS to be outgoing, wants a little bit of her freedom. Wants to walk around without a legion of soldiers around her. The Squire is different; she is already what she wants to be, for the most part. For her, this training is her love, as far as she knows. She takes pride in what she does. Perhaps she knows she likely won't be allowed to rise through the ranks as her fellow men due to her gender. This might manifest feelings of wanting to escape, knowing that there's something else in life she might want to use her training for. It's a bit cliche, but finally finding something she wants to protect might be the catalyst she needs to start yearning for freedom.

No.27016
>>27010

I love all of this

No.27023
>>27010

Just adding on to this... The Princess would likely already want an escape. As I proposed before, a possible future for her is one where she is likely married off, unless there is absolutely no male heir. If the Duke is family, a brother or cousin to the King, then the King raising the Duke's son is still upholding the lineage, keeping the bloodline. That's still in line with what would have been plausible in that era.

The Princess could always find a Prince, of course, or simply be the only heir if she so chose, but until a worthy suitor comes along, she'll be alone in rule, a burden the King likely wouldn't dare wish on her, thanks to his protective nature. She's getting older, and so is he, and he likely isn't enjoying his dwindling options. The Princess finding true happiness with someone, even outside of the castle, will appease him to some extent. It won't be his absolute ideal situation, but this isn't exactly a selfish King. Her happiness, in the wake of the Queen's death, takes precedence.

And besides, even if the Squire is a woman, she's still like the son he never had by the end of the story.

No.27322
I wanted to be sure to ask first, as I was going to post a little look at the process on my blog. I know we all are cool with using the finished first page on our own sites to talk about how the project is going, I just wanted to make sure it was okay if I posted >>24737 the roughdraft and >>25638 the first inks, sandwiched between the original layout and the final page to show a bit of the progress from stage to stage. Obviously there are a few steps passed over that I'd only describe, but I thought it would be interesting. Ya know, to the TWO followers I have on my blog.

I'm definitely thinking of the best pace to work in their desires for escape, but I'm going to try my best to make sure we work it all in just right. I think the squire will be the first to make some obvious mention of things, but the princess will be far more subtle at first. She is afterall much more aware of her duties and what is expected from her, and would feel guilty to just blurt out any displeasure at her lot in life.

No.27339
>>27322

I'm more than fine with any use of the works here. Anything that actually ties to the project, I'm pretty much giving a thumbs-up for usage.

No.27350
For full disclosure purposes, here is a link to my little blog post. I'll probably try to actually do something for the rest of my blog, since it's mostly random odd things right now, but I'm happy to have all these parts of the process together for easy viewing.

http://nutbarcorner.blogspot.com/2010/06/comic-project.html

No.27660
>>27350

Its totally cool seeing the images next to each other to see the evolution of that page.

No.27921
File: 12763151679.jpg-(91.30KB, 880x680, princessxsquiredraft08.jpg)
27921
So here are the next layouts. The Captain and one of his knights send off a messenger bird, so we can get the whole messenger bird thing established. Then we get the squire horsing around with another squire, and getting scolded when the Captain "Where is the princess right now?" The squire is unsure and the Captain points to her, and next page the captain will make it clear to her that she must not let the princess out of her sight. However, I have a special idea for the last panel, a panel just showing the princess, which I will discuss in my next post.

No.27923
File: 127631577171.jpg-(63.43KB, 885x680, princessxsquiredraft08a.jpg)
27923
So basically I want a pic of the princess done in the normal fashion in the foreground, and a very painterly close up of her behind her, inspired by Hong Kong comics. I'll post an example next.

The idea is also that doing a panel in this style will help in stand out, since I also forgot to draw the flower in the princess's hair (which should be quite cute). It mainly is a way to help emphasis the emotions of a scene, or in this panel emphasis just how lovely/precious/important the princess is (right now for squire's duty and later for personal reasons). In the upper right is an idea for doing the same type of thing in a scene were the squire is making a confession of love/commitment to the princess, where they would have painterly close ups.

No.27924
File: 127631638749.jpg-(147.04KB, 514x798, kof2003reference.jpg)
27924
Honestly I probably could have found a better example of this if I still knew where my RE:Code Veronica comic was, but this KOF2003 one will have to do. The whole page is here just cause it shows how most of the comic is done in a very normal inked style. The first panel shows a Kyo clone being kicked into the ground so hard he's basically embedded into it, and you get a good idea of how intense an injury it is by the close up. Not sure if it's something you guys want to do, and it does require a different method to see to completion. So, tell me what you think, I can draw something if Eli wants to test it out.

No.27930
>>27924

So, thinner lines, large blacks to accentuate value, more focus on color, is what you'd like to see?

No.27944
>>27930
No, assuming you take my meaning to be a change in the general look of the comic in anyway (which is perfect the way it is now). More like you would draw the panel normally, but the background lines would primarily be done over in color, too look like it is painted instead of colored linework. It would put the burden of the panel more on Eli's colors, so I'm curious to see what he thinks. I'm honestly not even sure if the look would work, since the colors have a painterly look already, but I'm hoping the contrast between straight colored inks and it will have the same effect. As in the kof pic, the face is still drawn in a traditional way, but mainly the lines are not black, just a darker shade of skintone and hair color. Something like drawing a character's lines in the appropriate colors with colored pencil, and then blocking in the colors with paint. Since I'm still not sure of my idea, I can easily do a more traditional layout (which I know pretty much exactly what I'd do with it). I could draw the next few pages both ways and we could see how you both like it.

No.27952
>>27944

I see what you mean. It doesn't seem too hard. If Anderjak did the lines for the background image, I could change them in photoshop to be colored, and gone after I'd colored over them.

No.28018
File: 127638225840.jpg-(40.36KB, 540x656, closeuptest.jpg)
28018
>>27952
Well, if you want, I know it's not the best pic, but I did this real fast to test things out. I was kinda thinking of changing this layout actually, and have it go a bit longer into the next page (since it'll still be the same scene anyway) so I can plan 4 or 5 pages together. Also, kinda considering it for when the squire first appears (kinda like in this pic) and for the princess after the captain explains how important the squire should take her duty. It would be sorta like the first time she REALLY sees the princess.

No.28039
File: 127638488227.jpg-(36.89KB, 536x282, Untitled5.jpg)
28039
Don't mind me.

No.28061
>>28018>>27952>>27944

To be honest, I completely missed your piror post, so I missed the point of the focus of the layout, and thought you were talking about the general inking! Ha. Was a little worried for a second.

The layout you're going for is decidedly Eastern, something I haven't had a lot of influence with in quite some time. I'll definitely see if I can work with it, however. And, considering backgrounds are not my strongest point, I wouldn't mind trying to find a better method to pull them off. I'm still going to ink the BG lines, of course, but if it helps, I can always submit those in a separate layer from the character inks, so they're more malleable.

No.28109
>>28061
No problem, I did kinda worry since I rushed on the post that it wouldn't be very clear (had work in 4 hours but still wanted to get the posts up before going to bed last night). But don't worry, I mean it when I say that I love the inks. As for how to do it, whatever is easier for Eli. As for this particular layout >>27921 I think I'll redo the last part of it and bring that last panel showing the princess to the next page, or even the one after. This is a good part to really establish the father daughter relationship, and I don't want to rush it. Also, for the 'special' panel, I'd like to have some more build up. Also if the princess is just 'right over there' it's not as much a lesson that the squire should keep her in sight. Lastly I thought I did a bad job of making the Captain have the same basic 'stern pose' and want to have him a bit more animated with some varied gestures. He is talking to his 'son' afterall.

No.28110
>>28039

<3<3

No.28121
File: 127640627970.png-(494.77KB, 540x656, 127638225840.png)
28121
Fairly rushed, but I was just trying to get the basic idea down. Shaded the background image with grey because I thought it would make it stand out more, and made the lines on her face a brown cause I liked the semi earthly look it gave it.

Tell me what you guys think.

No.28143
>>28121

I really like the look of this. I've adored your coloring for so long, and this sort of look only accentuates that.

No.28153
>>28121
Well darn... that's just plain amazing! Okay, I feel pretty confident in using the idea a few times if you guys do. I might even say add something along those lines in the first panel that the squire is fully shown (that pic was also sort of a reinvisioning over the first pose I put in the layouts).

No.28168
>>28121

Gunnerkrigg court texture?

No.28173
>>28168

I use SAI and you can change the layer type to a watercolor one, and when you use the marker tool over it, it gives it that texture

No.28215
File: 127648254455.jpg-(84.44KB, 433x757, ThisSummer.jpg)
28215
Hmmm, it's been a while since Anderjak has posted a page... I knew the pages without Squire or Princess would be a hurdle. Well, if anything will help, something purely fun and retarded like this should do!

Oh, I plan on actually using it a bit more, so I'll tell you my deviantart is Stranger59. I finally added you both to my watch list, so I'm overcoming my own lazy bit by bit. Besides that, I started reading Bakuman, and it's gotten me fired up for comicbookery, so I'll try to keep my passion ablaze!

edit: Had to repost cause I mispelled 'own'. I really should have studied in school more...

No.28220
>>28215

I have my reasons for being short on pages. But those horses... Fuck those horses, man. But they're important for the aesthetic! So I'll draw them. I MIGHT skip ahead to some further layouts, some slightly easier ones and work my way up, like I told myself I was going to? I've been trying to work for a fair amount of the day, and can't seem to make any headway. So I'm gonna get some sleep and come back to it with a clear head.

Also, that page is freakin' awesome.

No.28224
>>28220
I understand fully (especially about the horses!). Anything I can do though, don't hesitate to ask. I'll try to keep on things on my side, and when I when I need to blow off steam I'll try to do it creatively (instead of just playing games like I have been, but those Akrid don't hunt themselves!). I think focusing on my otaku passions has been helping me get my drive back, but I know life has it's way of sidelining us all. But best of luck with everything, especially since you and Eli being on this project has helped me gain my motivation once more. That is something I'm very thankful for.

No.28227
>>28224

While we're on it, I'm slowly figuring out my problems with the pages. SOMETHING wasn't sitting well, so I decided to do what always inspires me: Research.

So, uh, there're some better designs I could have just as easily gone with, so the King's got a bit of an upgrade to his armor. He's no longer sporting the chainmail over his head, but IS going with a gold circlet, similar to Princess's, as I doubt he's going to be going around with a crown outdoors unless he's out for show. The horses are also gonna be a little beefier, as I was basing my original designs around SHOW horses, who are leaner by a landslide. As it turns out, though, the lankier design isn't very age appropriate. So, the horses are stockier. They also support broader cloaks that wrap around their necks so that a) they can be warm in the cooler seasons and 2) because it keeps me from drawing some of the hardest parts of the horse, being the torso and the joints to the legs.

No.28242
Wouldn't you know it, I got a quarter of the page inked, and I can't find anything that's glaringly wrong, meaning I'm actually happy with it. Going to pick up my momentum tomorrow when I'm not passing out. All it took was a little time away and some re-envisioning.

No.28246
>>28242
Yay!

>>28215
That is the greatest image.

No.28251
>>28242
I just woke up from fitful sleep, reading this will probably help me rest much easier. This and some water... gotta keep hydrated.

>>28246
Thanks, I don't think enough people make Lethal Weapon 2 jokes. That was 2 right, not 3?

No.28321
>>28215

The final panel give me the feeling that DAT ASS pics will not be far behind.

No.28399
File: 127675004029.png-(495.09KB, 800x1035, 002-wip2.png)
28399
Again, sorry for the delay. More personal matters getting in the way. But! Proof I've been working. Pretty much redrew every single horse and character, did a quick redesign of the King for your approval.

No.28405
>>28399

Looking great so far! Hope everything starts to look up for you <3

No.28413
That's a very classy and likable looking King right there! I approve!

No.28444
>>28399

Fantastic stuff, its not even finished yet and that final panel is already emotional

No.28534
File: 127691413684.png-(329.97KB, 800x1035, 002.png)
28534
Submitted for your approval to the Midnight Society, tonight's tale...

THE MYSTERIOUS AND LONG-DELAYED PAGE.

Let me know if there are any problems.

No.28535
File: 127691422885.png-(2.34MB, 2550x3300, 002-hr.png)
28535
>>28534

... And with a high-resolution version juuuust in case everything goes swimmingly. If you'd like me to rethink the dialog, I'll gladly go back. Any suggestions, I'll go for 'em. I just wanted a few simple lines followed by silence, figuring that'd be "just enough."

No.28543
Also, I know it's a rather silly method, but even though I have every font I could possibly think of to use for this comic, I still trace over the lettering to achieve a handwritten quality to it. I'm not sure what it adds to the final page, but it's the tiniest bit of variety that makes me happy.

No.28554
>>28534

Oh wow, this is beautiful and touching. I'm away from home right now, but I'll be back Sunday and as soon as I get home I'm gonna get to coloring this. Really excited about it.

Also, any suggestions for the color scheme for the king or captain? I have some ideas (like, I really like the idea of the king being a redhead), but I want to know if you guys had anything you'd like to see.

No.28556
>>28554
Hahah thats me btw. On someone else's computer

No.28558
>>28554

Well, thanks! I'm glad it's having that effect on someone. The pacing was a pain in the ass for the longest time.

As for color scheme... You and I seem to be operating on a similar wavelength, because I was considering red-head, too. The way I'd been drawing the King, it's obvious the Princess does not take after her father, physically. I'll likely reflect this in her aunt near the end of the story, if that's still how it goes down, featuring some similarities physically between the Princess and the Duchess. The King, however, is certainly meant to be darker overall, less the bright, golden sunshine of his daughter and more a clear orange sunset, if you sort of get my meaning.

I'd been considering color themes for everything, and it's at least fairly obvious the King utilizes red as part of his banner or crest. So that would definitely show in his clothes. The circlet on his head would match any trim on his tabard or on the horses' cloaks, a good gold color. I didn't draw any trim or design on the cloaks, hoping you would have some ideas on how to go about that. It should be consistent with anything we do utilizing the King's family icon, any war banner or soldierly cloth, so as long as there's a visual connection with everything related, we're good to go.

I've been drawing the Captain as far closer to his daughter than the King to his own daughter; they share a lot of similarities, including that long nose, though he no longer bears the freckles the Squire does. Though we won't utilize it for quite a few pages, he should definitely sport darker hair. I figured the King would start losing a bit of his color in his hair, though his beard is still quite rich, while the Captain still has his colorful youth.

Say, for the horses, I imagine them quite dark. The types of horses I utilized as reference were a dark chocolate color. Uhm... What else... I can't think of much outside of that, as everything so far is falling into place. Considering your grasp on color so far, I honestly say "use your best judgment" and we'll give it a once-over, since you've been doing fantastically thus far.

No.28571
I friggin' LOVE IT... except for that middle upper horse in the first panel. I hate to nitpick over a horse since I know you worried about them, especially since all the others look great. Something about it's positioning doesn't seem right, or it's angle. Rather then redraw it though, I'd suggest moving it slightly to the left, perhaps a little bit up as well, and redoing the back legs just enough to get a better feel for which is in front. Give me about 10 minutes and I'll try to make it more clear what I'm saying.

No.28574
File: 127697752760.png-(2.19MB, 2550x3300, page2inks copy.png)
28574
>>28571
And this is what I think would look just a bit better. Just a slight move, which I think helps, not sure on my work on that rear leg. Tell me what you both think, I just think at first the horse ended up too much of a focal point in the original, and that it didn't make it as clear that they are probably setting up a basic perimeter.

No.28577
And sorry about sloppy work on that, you can see I even forgot to clip the very bottom of the grass near the horse's front hooves. I approve of all the ideas for color, it sounds just right. I also think the dialog is perfect, the perfect pace for the scene.

No.28582
>>28574

Yeah, wasn't sure what to do about the horse. Definitely agree on that. In lower resolution, your version looks just fine. Want me to go back through it anyway?

No.28587
>>28582
Yeah, whatever you feel is best, I know my line work on that back leg was a bit messy at least.

No.28591
>>28587

I'll redraw it. I've some ideas for it. Expect something tonight.

By the way, do you approve of the lettering I've been using? I used a slimmer set for the test pages, and a more comic-friendly set for the second page. If not, any font styles you'd recommend? I think going too fancy would result in lack of readability. The Komika font I've been sticking with is a good default all around, but I'm sure there's another style which could potentially work better.

No.28592
One random idea, instead of "...THE QUEEN" have it be "...OUR QUEEN" to show that the people loved her as well.

No.28593
>>28592

Works for me.

No.28595
It's a very readable and attractive font, I can't think of any way I'd change it. The natural touch from your tracing compliments both your style and Eli's colors.

No.28598
>>28558

Alright, I'll get to work on it when I get home tomorrow. I've been doodling some family crest designs so I'd have a quick way to put emblems on things. I've thinking either a lion or boar ( I think a gold lion would or best and maybe incorporate the boar look for the duke? I'm really just dicking around with ideas with that one.)

No.28658
Ha, wow, okay, I couldn't actually get to fixing anything myself. Homework, social life, all that. Eli, if you don't see a new post by the time you read this, assume I haven't gotten to the horse yet and use Stranger's fix. Luckily, it's still high-resolution! So it works out.

Also, could you toy around with some of the background characters/horses' lines being washed out a little? Like, I know we're looking to have a more painterly look to the backgrounds, but graying up the lines on the background characters or extras the sliiiightest bit might make the King and Captain pop more in that first panel. Just an idea.

No.28667
File: 127703730728.png-(2.36MB, 2550x3300, 002-hr.png)
28667
Okay; I actually managed to tackle it, and did the recommended fixes. I also took that fourth panel's bubble and merged it with the panel border, as that line was really annoying me. Sort of got in the way of flow. Anything else? If not, I'll get started on the revised layout for the next page, since I haven't yet done a layout where the king isn't on his horse. Well, I did the page after, but I still have to tackle the other pages.

No.28671
>>28667
I love it. I would marry it if I were still on Guam.

No.28685
>>28667

I really love what you did with that speech bubble in the fourth panel. I'll be home sometime today and get on coloring this.

No.28694
>>28667
Oooh, that page looks good. Only thing that I think you should consider is that last panel, it looks a bit pedestrian, or live theater-ish. Might want to consider revise the spatial relation between the Tombstone and the figure within the frame so they are not standing on the same plane (like if they overlaps, or if one is much closer then the other elements). This might create more dramatic tension and effect the transitional momentum that you can carry over to the next page.

No.28698
>>28694

Eugh, you're right. I think I know why I did it like that, too; that brief sabbatical, having done the sketch so long before I got to the inking, I didn't actually sit down and figure out what needed to be fixed. It looks as though what will really fix it is pushing the King upward a bit so he's directly in line with where the gravestone is facing.

Eli, could I ask you to knock him upward a bit? Maybe move the gravestone down a bit, too? Moving both of them will help keep the dynamic decent, and will better achieve that slight diagonal.

No.28702
File: 127707594627.png-(1.79MB, 2550x3300, blooooop.png)
28702
How's this?

No.28703
>>28702

Looks good! I like it. Is there any worry that it's pushing against the panels a bit much? I don't know. But I still think it looks good.

No.28709
>>28703
hmmm, the king might look better very, very slightly lower, but sure about moving the gravestone up or not. Eitherway, the change in planes was the right call.

No.28720
Question of curiosity, feel free to shoot it down. The third page; should the King have his little monologue, or would it be better instead to give Captain some lines with his troops? I was sort of thinking Squire could actually be there but in full armor, so we couldn't actually see her. All it would do would replace those first three panels, and I was sort of thinking we'd have an explanation of why the Princess appears to be all by her lonesome in the field.

I mostly ask because I can't think of much in the way of dialog for the King, and it'd be more visually interesting to shift focus while the King commiserates. Again, just an idea. It would at least help establish the Captain as a somewhat important character.

No.28740
>>28720
I'm unsure about having the squire there, but I do like the captain giving the king time alone at the grave and directing his men.

No.28753
>>28740

The Squire thing was an unsure concept, but if the Captain is going to be there at all and have any sort of presence in the story, better to establish him almost as equally as the King early on. As in, make his presence known.

No.28755
Yet again, I don't want to resize it, but its too big for me to upload: http://pics.livejournal.com/rampagingwalter/pic/0007warz

As always, let me know what you guys think.

No.28762
>>28755

It looks absolutely gorgeous. The fourth panel, I have a question about, though. Is the right side of his face supposed to look washed out? Everything else, I find wonderful.

No.28775
>>28762

Yes, I dunno what I was doing, I think I wanted to make that panel look different because of the zoom in and what he was saying. If you don't like it, I can totally fix it

No.28778
>>28775

I just think it's an odd contrast to the other panels, is all. I could be convinced either way on it. And your explanation does make sense.

No.28779
I also love it!

No.28780
File: 127717781446.png-(1.14MB, 800x1035, 002c.png)
28780
Brought it down to web-safe. I'm bringing these all down to 800px wide so we have the option of taking these and putting them on a website somewhere in webcomic format if we so decide to do that. I'll start poking about tonight or tomorrow, see if I can get a refined sketch of the next page. Might do alternates of it, one with the King's monologue, one with the Captain and crew, we can see which works better.

No.28781
Also, I think I understand a bit of what Eli was going for in the 4th panel. It reminds me of the sketchy, colorless scene in a certain anime where a certain character dies (you may or may not know the one). While the King isn't dying in that panel of course, he is talking to someone who is dead, and remembering the past. That's my opinion on it at least.

Yeah, I guess we should start figuring on how to start getting this out there once we have a bit more.

No.28784
>>28781

Like I said before, my Eastern influences are all but gone these days. But I sort of recall what you're talking about.

No.28785
>>28780

By the way, I fixed that little transparency problem in the bottom right corner of the page. The fix is up on my dA.

No.28822
Not sure if anything is gonna be up by then, but leaving for Missouri, be back in a few days

No.28839
>>28780
Nice, looking pretty good.

No.28930
File: 127746745289.png-(500.23KB, 800x1035, 003-wip2.png)
28930
Wait, is that...? Am I getting things done in a reasonable, timely manner? Well, looky that.

I'm going to tackle the inking this afternoon or evening, after I wake up. Also put up some preliminary dialog, just let me know if anything's off. And, I think I was right when I talked about swapping the King's little monologue with establishing the Captain. Has a reasonable flow to it, and gives us a little more time to set up what's lurking in the background. But I can always take another crack at it. Just give the word on that.

No.28933
>>28930
I read over it half a dozen times, and thought about every aspect of it that I could. I can't see a thing I'd change! The flow, dialog and expressions feel just right.

I know I haven't tossed out a layout in a while, but don't worry, the project is never far from my mind. I'm doing some work on other things for a bit though, partially to grow stronger, faster and more skilled. I think the redo of the last layout I did here >>27921 will be a more open set up as I consider the whole comic in a larger scale instead of just a few pages at a time. So I'm still very hyped and driven, even if I don't post anything particular for a while. Just going to keep improving myself so I can make sure everything I put out is worthy of all this great work you guys are doing!

No.28970
File: 127754419275.png-(276.99KB, 800x1035, 003.png)
28970
Aaaand the inks. Eli, just a head's up; because I am totally not a skilled inker [yet], what I would really like to do is, for panels 3 and 4, have the background a bit on the dark side. For the last three panels, focus more on the darker values, and make each panel get progressively darker as it zooms in. The lights could stay the same value and will likely get pushed further and further out with each darker panel. I don't know if this makes sense. But! You won't see this until you get back to your home state, so that's hardly a concern quite yet.

Until then, anything problematic thus far?

No.28974
File: 127754936273.png-(1.92MB, 2550x3300, 003-hr.png)
28974
Aaaand here's the high resolution.

No.28975
>>28970

I'm loving the art style, the expression on the soldiers face in the 4th panel is priceless

No.28976
File: 127755475696.png-(759.12KB, 800x1035, 004-wip1.png)
28976
I decided to tackle the fourth page sooner, since I knew this one would take me longer than the others. Really trying to push myself here, more so than before.

>>28975

Really glad you like it! I've been working on facial expressions for the past few weeks or so, so I'm glad it's starting to show.

No.28983
Alright, back from my trip. WHAT I HAVE ART TO COLOR!? This is a pleasant surprise. Will get on it asap

No.28984
>>28983

You might have TWO arts to color soon! Ha!

Also welcome back.

No.28985
>>28976

Oh god the perspective in panel 4 is DELICIOUS

No.28986
>>28984

Thanks! Also, having more art to color is never a bad thing.

No.28988
>>28985

It needs some tweaking [make horse taller], but I'm really proud of the sketch of that. Hoping like hell it actually ends up working once I put the inking touches on it.

No.29005
Only thing I'd suggest is making the angle of the assassin and the arrow match a bit more so it looks more like a straight angle from where he was holding to arrow to where it is. Everything else looks great, and I love how the panel angles draw your eye. As a single panel the first one draws your eye to the arrow, and the middle panels draw you to the moment the arrow is intercepted. The final panel manages to work entirely differently, by drawing your eye to the king in the foreground, it's as if there is a sudden release of tension as the panel expands and your eye goes from left to right. Through some might still be drawn right to left into the actions of the captain, that is how I felt when reading it, especially since the word bubbles help the mind linger on the panel.

I should have more layouts soon, keep being awesome!

No.29007
File: 127763652575.png-(142.32KB, 740x312, steadydeclineofpiratesandninjas.png)
29007
Reading over my first sentence, I'm reminded that I'm terrible at conveying my ideas through words. Anyway, I just overlaid the image atop this handy graph. I love the look of it all, but figured you might want to bring the pirate line and ninja line together. Which might be best with some tilting instead of really moving either element all that much (the arrow's position is great, afterall).

No.29019
>>29007

You're right. I'd thought about it after drawing it, but for some reason, didn't think much on it. Probably because I drew it at 4 in the morning.

Lovely graph, by the way.

Also, I actually had a very specific intent with the paneling of this page: I wanted to be a little more claustrophobic with them, make quicker shots of each scene. Rather than do a hell of a lot of close-ups, the angles of the panels allowed me to kind of push things along. I guess that last panel opens up from left to right could sort of be like a sigh of relief as things calm down.

I'll make the necessary fixes and see if I can get started on inking tonight.

No.29091
The new page: http://pics.livejournal.com/rampagingwalter/pic/0007x0zy

Also, I noticed a mess up from the second where I had forgotten to color over something and it was bugging me so I went ahead and fixed it: http://pics.livejournal.com/rampagingwalter/pic/0007yqxy

No.29095
>>29091
New page is awesome! Except for the inside of the captain's mouth on panel 3 and maybe his tongue on panel 5, and the bow on panel 7. I almost worry that it's too dark in panel 8, but I'll let you and Anderjak make that call. But it's badass to see, good job!

No.29097
File: 127785426586.jpg-(43.56KB, 396x337, itsveryclassy.jpg)
29097
I might be a bad person for this...

But this is exactly what I when I love something. The make silly things with it, not the... other thing.

No.29099
Yeah, there are definitely a couple of things glossed over in the coloring. However, the page is just SO DAMN GOOD. And Eli basically did what I was hoping would happen on that last panel. It IS dark, though, and maybe it could use some kind of brighter value somewhere, maybe in the face and the foreground hand, to make the panel pop. Still, they're very minor things in an otherwise fantastic piece.

No.29101
>>29095>>29099

OH GOD i meant to fix those before upload fff sorry, let me fix it real quick

No.29102
Fixed the mouthes and added some more lighter colors to the bottom three panels. If you want more, just let me know!
http://pics.livejournal.com/rampagingwalter/pic/0007ze3h

No.29103
It looks fabulous!

No.29105
File: 127786380582.png-(1.06MB, 800x1035, 002c2.png)
29105
And here's one websafe...

No.29106
File: 127786385586.png-(903.43KB, 800x1035, 003c.png)
29106
>>29105

... and the other.

No.29109
Casual observer here.
Just wanted to say that I love all of you for doing this. I didn't think this would actually go through at first, but I'm really impressed with how well you guys are doing this.

>>29106
>>29102
Also had an urge to mention that I love how the assassin came out in this. For some reason he really stands out to me.

No.29138
>>29109

Thank you very much c:

No.29144
>>14355
Looking at this, I realized the pacing is again mega super crazy fast! I am right this second doing an updated layout, which will turn the conversation with the Captain and King into 2, perhaps 3 pages. I'll have it in as soon as possible, tonight if I can.

I feel fine with the lead in to the squire though.

No.29145
>>29144

As I've said before: No reason to consolidate. The pace should be what's best for the story, not what's more convenient for anyone drawing it. The only problem I'll have is making two to three pages of dialog visually interesting, but I've been doing fairly well so far, so it'll just be another challenge.

No.29146
File: 127795396637.jpg-(93.10KB, 887x680, princessxsquiredraft03Arevision.jpg)
29146
Okay, LET'S ROCK!

p1 and 2- Captain is talking about taking down the bandits (whom he is sure are behind the attack), kicking ass and taking names
p3-King asks all the soldiers to leave. p4 and p5 are silent, King is raising from his chair in p5 as the door shuts.

p1-K:How is your son's training coming along?
p2-C:Very well, technically, but still undisciplined and ra K: Good enough!
p3- C:Good enough? For what, might I ask? K:For protecting the most valuable part of my kingdom, of course!
p4- K:I got lucky with how things turned out. I could have died in an instant, and then she'd have no one left. Both her parents together in the beyond.
p5- note: the idea I have here is the sunset is coming through the windows, and the light is adding a somber mood and filtering past them. The contrast should be pretty high between the warm light and the cool shadow, but not too dark as their expressions are very important. Both are obviously introspective.

No.29147
File: 127795460836.jpg-(45.46KB, 427x652, princessxsquiredraft03Brevision.jpg)
29147
p1- K: I won't have this picture burned like the one that hung before it. C: Aye, m'lord.
p2- Then it's decided! Your son will guard my dear daughter!
p3- Are you certain?
p4- But of course, old friend! Why, of all our squires, your son is the only one she might not feel uncomfortable around! C: Very well, I'll make arrangements immediatly!

Obviously tweak dialog to fit better with the feel, just keep the basic feel that these guys are total buddies. First chance to really see how lighthearted the king can be, but still bringing in that solemn side from the gravestone.

I wish I didn't have work tomorrow, but I do feel I got a good amount done. I feel pretty fired up though I'm still working on my technique and maintaining my pace. Still, I'm very happy with how these turned out, and am eager to get more done!

No.29148
>>29146 >>29147

These're pretty damn good. I can't think of anything to improve the pacing, honestly, and I enjoy the dialog. Aside from very minor tweaks, this may go relatively unchanged.

No.29347
I just wanted to bump this thread to tell you guys how amazingly cool I think this project is! I love it so much and I hope you all take it very far because I just love it!

No.29350
I like the momentum this projects picking up at the moment. Not to make this a mindless bump but "moar pages plz"!

No.29385
The project I was working on got derailed nastily to the point it won't be done. A whole lot of work with no return this summer! Which is the chief reason I haven't finished the inking on page 4. But that's over with, I'll tackle the rest of the inking today.

>>29347>>29350

Thank you guys so much. I'm fairly certain I speak for all of us when I say it means the world to us.

No.29389
>>29385
Well, you got my contact info so if there is anything I can do to help you salvage your other project just ask. Not that I even know what type of project it is or what it's about, but I know how frustrating that can be. I need to find one of my layouts or redraw a bit, since I have some revisions to the later pages. Nothing that will effect the next several pages though.

No.29390
>>29389

The meat of it: I've been working on a five-minute animated short which was meant to be worked on by a team at my university. They were on a different project first, and I was supposed to take any team members who split off when their work was done. Thing is, seven weeks into a twelve week production period, they only just started serious animation, so I had to cut my project completely and do a different one- to two-minute project much smaller in scale. There's some other outlets I have for the project, including a studio which is opening up in Mexico, but I have to go through some legal business before anything gets started, IF it gets started.

It's a clusterfuck, but at least I have a whole bunch of storyboards and character designs and scripts ready to go whenever.

No.29391
>>29390
>including a studio which is opening up in Mexico
Make it Monterrey and you've got yourself an intern.

No.29392
>>29391

Hey, if it actually works out... Though, it's not really within my control. Someone else is getting the group together and figuring out all the international stuff, how it's actually going to go down. They've got big plans, though, so who knows? They'll definitely need some hires as soon as the doors open.

No.29407
Well, sorry that I don't have any real experience with that sorta thing to help you with, but I wish you best of luck with it. And I'll love to see how it all turns out.

No.29453
File: 127891267653.png-(2.35MB, 2550x3300, 004-hr.png)
29453
Here's the inks. Let me know if there's anything missing. Also, Eli, for panel 3 with the King, I didn't exactly know how to handle the background, that sort of electric "conflict" line which I drew in the background of the sketch. If you could figure out how to handle it, give it a crack, otherwise I'm gonna poke at it while I'm working on the layouts for the next few pages.

No.29454
>>29453

Alright, I'll get started on it and mess around with that third panel

No.29456
how the fuck is this co related

No.29457
>>29456

Well, /co/ created it. And it's a comic. Therefore...

No.29461
>>29456
/coc/ stopped being about /co/ a long time ago. Nowadays it's simply a repository of ideas for the creative. Not necessarily a bad thing

No.29464
>>29457
Correct answer in everyway, as I believe creating a comic is about as /co/ related as anything can be. Also, if not for this place, I'd never have found such perfect partners for the project.

No.29493
http://pics.livejournal.com/rampagingwalter/pic/0008b5eg

Really happy with how this page turned out.

As for panel 3, I couldn't really come up with anything. The widescreen look is only a placeholder, unless you guys actually dig it.

No.29505
>>29493

The page as a whole looks fantastic. I'm adoring the way you handled the lighting, and especially that swipe of the sword.

As for panel 3, yeah, I couldn't come up with a better idea for it. I think the idea I had for the sketch would work best, so either I ink that or you color it in with the sketch layer as a temporary overlay.

Also, I think you're actually getting significantly better at this. Either that, or I'm just continually impressed by your consistently great work.

No.29506
File: 127915957093.jpg-(108.72KB, 880x680, princessxsquiredraft08muchbetter.jpg)
29506
Okay, the last set of layouts I did was very rushed at the time, mostly cause I wanted to get right to that visual idea with the background close up color thingy. But here, revised and improved, is my real pass at that layout, so you can just go ahead and burn that other version!

page
Some talk about bandits and messenger birds... I'll think of dialog later.
p3: talk ends with mentioning the princess, and the knight saying to the captain "Sir, speaking of the princess..."
p4: captain "..." maybe some noises from Squire and buddy playing around.
p5: Captain (off panel): Son!

page
p1: (off panel) Ow! (along with appropriate sound effect)
p2: S: Yes, father?
p3: Cap: Where is the princess? Squire: Well, she's right by... over with... Oh, DAMN!
p4: Everyone! Mount up and fan out! Break into teams of two an
Cap: Belay that, at ease. (do knights say "belay that"? Or is that, like, something you only say on a boat?)
p5: Ya know, you're hard to stay mad at when you lose your cool like that. It's the main thing you get from your mother!
Squire: But, father, the princess!
Captain: Walk with me, son.

No.29514
>>29505

Thank you! I'm starting to get really comfortable with coloring these pages, which I think is effecting their overall look.

For panel 3, would it be too much to ask to have you ink it? It would make it infinitely easier.

No.29523
>>29514

Will do.

No.29524
File: 127923250979.png-(2.41MB, 2550x3300, 004-hr.png)
29524
Hope this looks alright. Also did some very minor touch-ups around the page, nothing that requires re-coloring.

No.29529
File: 127923800641.png-(1.04MB, 800x1035, 004c.png)
29529
>>29527

And uploaded to the dA! Looks fantastic.

No.29535
>>29529
Gotta say: that is an extremely badass knight. Chopped that arrow in half.

No.29537
>>29535

Purely accidental! He wanted to block it, but got overzealous.

If he were to tell it, however, he'd gladly say his sword was guided fair and true to split the offending arrow in twain as the sun bore down favorably upon his skill.

[Everyone else there knows it was total bullshit, however.]

No.29678
Any progress on the next page? It's been a little quiet for the last week.

Also, did anyone actually decide on a historic period to set this in or was it just decided to set it in miscellanious medieval times.

Just to chirp in on that, you could consider the dark ages, since there were alot of kings knocking about then with they're own kingdoms, or one of the English Barons War's, since you've have alot of turmoil to fit the story in.

Oh and keep up the good work

No.29686
>>29678

My summer semester is wrapping up, and I'm going to be away on vacation, so hopefully I'll be able to do some new pages sometime within the next week. I'd like to have a page sketched and inked by Sunday.

As for a specific time period, it looks like we're going for general "medieval times." No specific era, as far as I'm aware.

No.29687
>>29686

I'm gonna be leaving for a week trip to Vegas on Monday, so if anything pops up in that time, I won't be able to work on it til Saturday.

No.29689
>>29687

I'll be sure to get started on it as soon as I can, then.

No.29690
File: 12799870474.jpg-(67.33KB, 860x680, princessxsquiredraft09.jpg)
29690
And here I thought I'd be doctor updates with all my layout posting, but a darn internet problem totally delayed me! Well, here are the next few layouts! So we continue right off from before (as I said, I'm focusing on scenes lasting longer and having as natural a transition as I can make).

page
p1 - S: Were you trying to catch us a dinner, M'lady? P: Oh! No! I mean, that is I didn't think...
p2 - S: I jest, Princess! We've more then enough supplies that any cute animals you find won't need to meet such a fate! P: I'm glad, though a bit embarrassed that I'm so unaccustomed to your jesting.
p3: Oh... yeah, I get a bit carried away sometimes. My deepest apologies for being distracted earlier. P: It is no worry, Squire. I am just extra unaccustomed to rowdy play, I hope I wasn't a bother by wandering off.
page
p1- knight in the distance announces that it's time to head out.
p2 - S: Well, let us be off. P: Alright.
p3 - S: M'lady.
p4 - P: Thank you.
p5 - knight: Your steed, M'lady.
p6 - knight: Apologies, I forgot your step, I'll go fetch it. S: Ah, there is no need for that!

No.29691
File: 12799898329.jpg-(107.55KB, 887x675, princessxsquiredraft10.jpg)
29691
Okay, on the previous layout, the full shot of them sitting on the log is probably something we can use later as a wallpaper or to somehow promote the comic (besides just making images for that purpose).

page
p1: S: Allow me to be your step!
p2: P: I-I couldn't possibly do that! S: Nonsense, M'lady! For one who holds chivalry in their hearts, it is both a duty and a honor to serve a lady in such a way. (p3 is silent, or P: ..., which ever you like better)
p4 - A-alright/O-okay (whichever is voted to be cuter). p5 is silent, but needs special mention. I originally drew a smile, since I didn't want her to seem sad by being stepped on, but then it felt like she was too smug, or at the very worst it could be seen as fetishy. I settled on a subtle look of revenance, as Squire is honestly happy to perform this duty, but her earlier scolding keeps her from being too full of herself.
p6 - S: There, that wasn't so bad, now was it? P: I suppose.
p7 - S: Shall we depart? P: Y-yes.
page
p2 - What is that there?
p3 - (maybe make it clearer that it's a tower) That's a fort left over fro, eh? (she notices the bit of rubble falling off the tower)
p4 - S: Father! C: Spread out. (p5 is silent)
p6 - P: What is it? S: One moment, princess!

No.29694
>>29691>>29690

Love these layouts. Also I vote for A-Alright. Sounds adorable

No.29695
File: 128000625153.jpg-(91.22KB, 892x680, princessxsquiredraft09actual.jpg)
29695
>>29694
thank you, though I just realize I forgot a page!

This one goes before >>29690

I'll try to think of the dialog in detail later, but basically the Captain scolds Squire and teaches her that her duty to the princess is the most important thing for her. I thought I had uploaded it, but looking back it seems I forgot.

No.29887
Back and ready to go

No.29892
>>29887

I'll be in tomorrow evening. Haven't even had the remotest chance to touch the project during all of vacation.

No.29894
>>29892

That's fine, there really isn't a rush or anything. It's not like we have a deadline.

Also, how was your vacation?

No.29918
>>29894

San Francisco was gorgeous. Never ate better. I was miserable for half the trip due to personal matters [no one died, not a big deal], but it was enjoyed nonetheless.

No.29920
>>29918

Glad you had a good time! c:

No.29944
Glad you guys had fun out of town. I have a few more layouts I'll post later, but trying to work my way through the fight scene. It's odd switching gears to it, so I'm letting my brain relax a little and focusing on just drawing everyday for several hours. The pen and paper rpg I'm helping with is finally getting work done as well, so I've been heading up art for that. But as usual, the comic is never far from my mind.

No.30319
so uh, how's everything going?

No.30321
>>30319

The lagging behind's entirely my fault. My schedule's pretty tight at the moment, but my fall semester should be a little friendlier [five day weekend]. I'm shooting for a page a week at minimum hopefully starting this weekend, at least until I can get a good work schedule going.

No.30331
No worries. I've been training my own art and working hard on illustrating a pen and paper rpg. Thanks to a webcomic Eli suggested I think I am finally really inspired to finish this fight scene!

No.30394
File: 128242085435.png-(471.40KB, 800x1035, 005-sketch1.png)
30394
Alright, had some extra time today. Here's my first pass. Something's off about the layout, though; fairly certain it's the third and fourth panels, something about the flow of it. I'll take a few more cracks at it, hoping to have a finished sketch by tomorrow night.

No.30399
File: 128243099160.jpg-(68.35KB, 536x850, scan0035.jpg)
30399
>>30394
Sorry I took so long, I didn't see this til about an hour ago, and I've been starring at it ever since. This is my best idea so far, which will require redrawing panel 3, possibly panel 1 (depending on how you think adding the flowers will look best). I think the flow with the new panel 3 and the change of directions for 4 allows it to feel like a solid left to right pass from the assassin, while the princess stays in basically the same spot. There is probably something symbolism here about how events at first rush past her, but that symbolism is something I'll have to brainstorm to exploit later.

My only other main addition is to go back to the idea of her picking flowers. Girl loooooooves flowers. And having them all be destroyed and scattered by the assassin is much easier symbolism than the other thing. Tell me what you think.

No.30401
Okay, I did think about that symbolism a bit, and I think in the end, when the Duke's plan is revealed, I have a few plans on how to make the Princess take center stage. She was already planned to be the one who figured out the peaceful solution, but I also want to highlight how determined she is. Another concept will be their roles as a Princess, a future Queen, and the Squire a future Knight. I'll explain it much more when I get to the layouts (which I might have to start skipping around on a bit, and I'll sort them later in a pdf or something), but there will be tension as they are wanting to escape their lives as such, but also run that along side the fact that, titles or not, they are who they are. The princess will always be 'royal', elegant and refined. The squire will always be a woman of action and duty (though to her personal Queen instead of the kingdom).

Also, I determined only one bandit will really be left alive at the final bandit fight where Squire is wounded (the fight before the whole castle adventure). And his defeat by the Princess will mirror the page we are not discussing, to show the Princess actively tackling events that come her way instead of being passive. Also, having only one (later) sympathetic bandit makes things alot easier, and this bandit will play aprominent role in the first bandit fight as well.

Every page, every discussion and every post helps me get a clearer picture of this all in my mind, so I'll keep hard at work!

No.30402
>>30399>>30401

I'll get to a redraw here in a bit, after dinner and all that. Your ideas work; I wouldn't have thought of enhancing that symbolism at all thanks to my delay between pages causing me to forget a few details.

As for the latter info, I can't wait to see how it'll all turn out.

No.30451
woooooow. just wow. i was directed here from /u/, and can i just say, stranger and anderjak, you guys are my heroes. as a former drawfag, (its been at least 5 years by now) i know how hard it is to stay focused on one project. I cant tell you how many great ideas ive had for books/comics/graphic novels that ive had to completely scrap due to lack of motivation. anyways, keep up the awesome work!

No.30452
>>30451
Lol. I think Ander got really focused on this. Totally forgot my request from like.. months ago. =P

No.30530
>>30452

Sad fact, I actually got started on a couple of those requests til I found out first-hand I was one of the targets of the anti-drawfag flooding in /co/. I pretty much abandoned that thread in /draw/ because of it. Nasty state of affairs.

>>30451

Don't discount Eli, who's still been putting out fantastic work on the color front.

Also, too many meetings in a single weekend; I'll tackle the final sketch page in the morning, during my comic-ing class [greatest excuse to do an outside project ever].

No.30532
>>30530
Damn, /co/ is attacking it's drawfags? I guess it's part of how trolls work: target something GREAT and tear the whole board down. It certainly worked on /tg/, where we are down to a handful of drawfags on a good day.

Also I'm sure Eli is ready and eager for another page, to apply that amazing coloring magic yet again. I don't think I've mentioned how awesome you both are in a while, which is shameful! You guys rock as hard as can be rocked.

No.30544
>>30530
Aw shucks, that's not cool of them. I guess it'd be rude if I still asked for it then :\

No.30557
File: 128257975432.png-(434.44KB, 800x1035, 005-sketch1.png)
30557
Here's a further pass at the sketch. Fifth panel's going to have more stuff falling down, more flowers and such, but outside of that, this is what I'm going for.

>>30544

It wouldn't be RUDE, no. Just this thread isn't the place for it, ha. I still look at /draw/ pretty often, so I'll see if I actually have time to fill out a couple of the requests.

No.30575
>>30557
Awwwwww, yeeaaaaaaah! That looks damn good!

No.30578
>>30575

Great! I just need to figure out where exactly to fit dialog. In the redraw, I for some reason didn't account for them. I'll likely keep the dialog the same, including some dialog from your original layout in the last panel. I feel less awkward about the "One side, brat!" line's placement now, though I can't fathom why.

No.30618
Oh wow, I haven't checked this in awhile due to also being extremely busy. That last layout look awesome!

It might take me some time to get the new page finished once the lineart is done. Mother just had surgery and I'm gonna be helping her out alot.

No.30619
Well, best wishes for you and your mom. I think it'll be okay for a while. I know I certainly have alot to think about for the story, and will post as soon as I have some solid stuff.

No.30641
>>30618

Best wishes to your mom, then. Hope everything goes well.

I'll do my best to make sure you have some work to return to, ha.

No.31013
Sonofabitch, I've been so busy, I hadn't even noticed it'd been a good week since I started inking the most recent page. I've got four hours free tomorrow, gonna get cracking then. This semester's already riding me pretty bad.

No.31117
>>31013

Though I'm not working on the project, I've been following it for a few months and I know how you feel. Though I'm taking only one more credit than last semester, I can feel the effects that the extra hour is taking on my body. I appreciate all that you and everyone else involved are doing.

No.31261
Oh shit, this thing is still going?

Awesome

No.31602
File: 128399754466.png-(327.49KB, 800x1035, 005.png)
31602
HOLY BALLS

No.31603
File: 128399757933.png-(2.47MB, 2550x3300, 005-hr.png)
31603
ALSO HIGH RESOLUTION

No.31815
>>31602
>>31603
I gave both the once over... 5 times, and can't see any problems at all! I like the look and flow of it, you never fail to impress!

No.31816
>>31815

I'm not 100% on it. Call it never being satisfied with my own stuff, but I'd really like to come back to these pages somewhere down the line, touch them up or redo them altogether. That's for somewhere near the end of the project, however.

Hey, while Eli is working through the colors, mind if I just stick with sketch pages for a while? I want to see if I can actually knock out multiple pages throughout the week, and just focus on getting the story told instead of the more pain-staking process of inking for just a little bit.

No.31820
Quick question before I finish. In the last panel, is that the captain? or just a random soldier? Want to make sure I get the colors right.

No.31822
Scratch that, I see he has no shoulder guards. My bad.

No.31841
>>31822

Ha, it's cool. I try to add what I can to discern everyone, but I'd undoubtedly miss a detail from time to time.

No.31854
File: 128459030811.png-(5.13MB, 1785x2310, 1283997579332.png)
31854
Sorry it took so long! As usual, tell me what you think.

No.31855
>>31854

Ha, it'd been so long since the first page that I'd completely forgotten the Princess's color scheme.

I love the chalky skin of the assassin, and the color choices [especially the milkiness of his crummy eye]. Your value work's fantastic, too. Honestly, the only nitpicks I have with this page are just my own lines. Fantastic job.

No.31857
>>31855

Thank you. My coloring "style" I guess has started to change and I'd forgotten how I colored the others so I was worried it would look too different from the other pages.

No.31858
>>31857

Does that count if it just gets "better"? Considering the nature of the project, we should expect certain levels of inconsistency as we progress. If we're lucky, the last bunch of comics will look significantly better than the stuff we're doing now.

Which, frankly, has me excited.

No.31859
>>31858

Oh, I agree. I love seeing progression in comics. I just wasn't sure if everyone felt the same way I did haha

No.31860
>>31816
Sounds like a plan. Focusing on the sketches will help the next pages have a good flow together, so it's all for the best.

>>31854
Looks great!

I haven't been able to focus much lately, sorry. But I'll try to get myself sorted out and out of my funk. Thank you both, the great work you put in is always impressive and inspirational.

No.31861
>>31860

I'll get cracking on the next page and will hopefully have it up by next weekend. I'll see if I can do some other sketches too. Until I get my supplies, I can't begin my other comic project, so I still have a little extra time. Hopefully I can organize a little better!



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