Oh shit, more pages?

Neat

BTW, whatever happen to the DC version, did you ever finish the story?

I like it, but I'd like to see Psylocke in a more slender bodytype. She's supposed to be like a ninja.

>>146689
I think I prefer her with huge cans, but to each their own.

>>146689
Same

I like the new more cartoony look(even though its apparently traced), but I would prefer more realistic proportions as well...or at least not everyone having such huge tits, variety in body types is preferable.

thats classic psyclocke with the huge tits.

good story, i wonder if next you'll have emma change his appearance to be some other male, who the woman mindslave looks up to?

like emma makes him professor x. and psyclocke gets mindraped by prof x every night, it affects her real life relationship with him... then she stabs him to death, thus eliminating your only danger. since your powers dont work on male telepaths?

ok maybe its a terrible idea. something to hink about.

did you do jubilee? love your work , art and story are both fun.

wow, good stuff.

You've got a good style and a lot of potential OP. Reminds me of Hentai artist Oda Non bigtime.

Your grasp of anatomy is pretty good! However I feel your perspective was off here and there and your lineart could be smoother, great frame composition for the most part too.

However, you are a TERRIBLE writer in my opinion. If you had a writer and colorist to assist you, you would be amazing.

>>146947
OP here. Boo! Sorry to hear you hated the writing. Was it the /nc/ aspect you found off-putting, or the dialogue? I'm trying to be more naturalistic with the dialogue than I used to be... I don't want it to distract from the story.

>>146923
Thanks for your suggestions, and for your endorsement of Betsy and Emma's huge tits! I mean, this is the corset-loving White Queen we're talking about, and if you go back through the old comics, Psylocke was always spectacularly endowed. Why would I deny myself the fun?

>>146947
Dude, the entire thing is a ripoff of an Oda Non comic.

Some shit keeps posting on /co/ at random intervals claiming it's his. It appears he now spread to /pco/.

>>146968
OP here. Thanks, but I've actually never read an Oda Non comic. I'll certainly check it out now though. Please don't slander my work -- if you can add constructive feedback, I always appreciate a discussion.

dont mind >>146968
a troll that thinks only one artist ever does mind slave rape. and that that one artist is the originator. and that anyone else doing this genre is a ripoff.

crazyness. whats wrong with some people?

1/10

>>146967
The dialog just isn't sexy or clever and was a little obnoxious and unnecessary in my opinion.

You probably could have left ALL the dialog out and the readers would have still understood the story perfectly.

Ask yourself: "what is the dialog adding?"

The content is fine by me, I'm not a fan of mind control and rape personally, create whatever you like. I just think it's sexier when there is tension or a hook in a story. If I had written this, I would have made it so that main character used Cerebro to invade a sexual dream Betsy/Psylocke was already having, then gradually turned it into something darker/a nightmare for her that half terrified her and half aroused her.

Here is an example
First panel/page shows Psylocke in the loving embrace of another male Marvel character, kissing/cuddling (perhaps on a bed). The male character gradually becomes more forceful and violent, which starts to scare her but she still reciprocates, the male begins to turn into the main character. The dream changes to a dungeon setting.
Psylocke: "I've never had a dream like this before... it feels so filthy and wrong... but I want more." she thinks as she is ravished and humiliated by the main character, etc

I could keep going but I think you get the point. I feel like there needs to be a hook in every story or more creativity than "Someone gets raped." I may be weird, but I feel atmosphere and story are what make something erotic. If I just wanted to see fucking I could watch porn.

Just my two cents.

>>146973
>if you can add constructive feedback, I always appreciate a discussion
And every time you get any you ignore it.
I remember you from /co/ and I remember the tracing and line comparison photos that prove it.

>>146988
>>147011

I think you guys are being way too hash. This guy isn't that bad. His shit is well composed. Compared to the subpar MSpaint level porn that floods the net. this guy is pretty good.

>>147089
If you actually followed the comments and read them, you would see I wasn't insulting his art, but telling him ways to improve his writing.

His stuff is good, but flawed. If he was just another one of those shitty MSpaint artists I wouldn't even bother. I want to see him make better comics and am giving him my advice on doing so. It's his choice whether to accept it or not.

Yeah, the dialogue is not sexy at all.

I mean, it doesn't even have to do with the whole misogyny thing, because even that sort of stuff can be written in a sexy way, the whole control and servitude thing is huge with men and women alike.

It's just written in a way that comes off as obnoxious and actually a turn off.

Hell, just look at Hentai, those guys can make even the most fucked up shit fappable. Isn't rape NTR like the biggest "genre" nowadays?

So yeah, if you just can't write good relevant dialogue, might as well leave it out completely. And hey, no dialogue or unreadable dialogue works for Hentai too.

OP, where can I find this entire series?

>>147204
Most of it is up either at pegasus.wwoec.com or at benchleyfan01.imgur.com.

btw any plans for a wonder woman queen of the amazons comic? :)

>>147238
I am working on a Wonder Woman concept right now, something in the vein of Ignacio Calero's Warlord vs Wonder Woman.

>>147274
A Wonder Woman fanfic that's even remotely close to her actual lore or personality would be nice.

I mean, why are there so many stories about her and yet none of them get anything right about her?

I guess research or basic knowledge about the character is too much to as for.

More She-Hulk and Power Girl. Always.

>>147409
I think for a lot of people Wonder Woman is more about what she represents, and about her sexual appearance, than her lore or actual character. She's a bodacious bitch, and probably the most famous superheroine. So the fact that there's so much content out there about her (and much of it underinformed) is no surprise.

Any chance that you have a rar of your stuff?

I love this stuff! And the actual written work is better writing than when it's condensed into comic form but I love the art of this too! I see the comics as a supplement to the written work. For the guy complaining about dialogue or the writing, read the actual story. There the dialogue is broken up by prose so it's not a constant stream of "talking" that you may not like, and it flows much nicer.
Keep it up, this stuff is like realizing the images my mind made from the stories in graphic form! I love it!

>>147940
I do agree that his writing works much better in the fanfics, maybe instead of trying to make comics based on those stories, he should simply do specific pics that complement them.

Like those visual novels perhaps?

That way he can be more descriptive in the writing department and the art giving the reader a general idea instead of trying to carry the whole thing.

No, you people have it all wrong

He is obviously ripping off Izayoi Seishin, not Oda.

I like the earlier style better.

Posting the beginnings of a new Wonder Woman chapter I'm working on. As all, any commentary/crit/questions appreciated!

Wonder Woman 0/9

Wonder Woman 1/9

Wonder Woman 2/9

Wonder Woman 3/9

>>149010

Wonder Woman 4/9

Wonder Woman 5/9

Wonder Woman 6/9

Wonder Woman 7/9

Wonder Woman 8/9

Wonder Woman 9/9

Wonder Woman 10/13

Wonder Woman 11/13

Wonder Woman 13/13

Thoughts?

>>149135
>Thoughts?

You may want to experiment with different body types and using your own poses instead of picking them from other books. Recognizing a pose directly form another work can be very off-putting, and using characters with the exact same body types over and over can get boring. Plus, some people might prefer a different variety as well. Same for the stories.

If you're going to trace you could at least look for characters with an appropriate expression to trace. WW looks happy to be getting raped in a couple of those panels.

>>149137
Knowing Diana, she IS happy to be getting raped.

I'm more displeased by the over the top body type on Wonder Woman, than the apparent tracing to be honest.

I mean, if the story was about Wonder Woman getting her body modified to look more like a super exuberant sex goddess against her will or something like that, than it would be fine, great even if the story was well done. Otherwise its just kind of distracting, not to mention it just reinforces the argument that you can only draw(or trace if you want to go there) one body type.

I get, its just porn, but she is supposed to be the athletic warrior type, right?

I would have just gone with Chiang's version...but thats just my opinion

>>149135

No money shot?

People are giving you a lot of shit, so I'm gonna try to be brief. Regardless of everything else I liked it.

It is kind of odd that WW would be soft like that. You'd think she'd have a more athletic body.

but I can't be picky.

Do a Sue Storm one, OP.
With T'Challa, preferably

>>149149
>>149141
>>149136
>athletic body
Btw, don't listen to these /fit/fags. I for one like that MILFy curvy type of body. It's not canon, after all, it's a porn parody.

>>149010
>>149012

>>149151
Why bother drawing or tracing porn about a character if its not going to look anything like her?

>>149177
It's called referencing, and it is a common way to learn. However it is used too often here.

He is the Greg Land of pornography

>>149182

Isn't Greg Land already the Greg Land of pornography?

Greg Land would be the Greg Land of Pornogreg Land if Greg Land traced porn into porn. Instead, he's the Greg Land of Mighty Avengers land, and he's here to show you Spectrum's O-face.

Note she has the same O-face as about 7 other marvel heroines and at least 1 hero.
>>149180
Referencing != tracing

>>149141
>if the story was about Wonder Woman getting her body modified to look more like a super exuberant sex goddess against her will or something like that
Do we have a bimbofication or body modification in general thread?

>>149187
>Referencing != tracing
if you are Greg Land it is

>>149187
>Referencing != tracing

True, but in this case it looks like it might actually be copied freehand instead of simply traced. It's blatant swiping, but it's not 1:1. There's proportional differences.

Copying freehand still takes some degree of skill. So the guy's got that going for him, at least, even if the product isn't too appealing to me.

Much porn feature rape, but these comics are really rape-rapey. Like you get the impression that whoever draws this would do it in real life too, given the chance.

>>149280
Really? I don't get that vibe at all. These comics are about forcing someone to enjoy it.

I worry about the comics where someone is getting off on the other person disliking it. That's really rapey.

I guess the darksied one is more like that, but he's suppose to be a bad guy

>>149135
Needs more cum.

>>149203
lets just keep this terrible shit compressed into one convenient easily collapsable traced cess pool.

>>149353
...are you seriously trying to take some type of "high road" when dealing with porn?

Oh you

pff, i'd rather have traced stories than someone like zimmerman or smudge's art that looks exactly the same (and retarded faces, curves) all the time.

so thanks pegasus. your traces look better than a lot of shitty art out there.

>>149479
I'd rather go look at the work of the original artist he stole from than a shit tracing of them.

>>149135
damn
referencing/tracing whatever, you did not have to put in this much work for a porn comic but you did and I thank you.
I especially like
>>149021
's composition and how you repeat that later for more emphasis on another page.
And that panel of her hair being pulled is hotter than actually seeing Wonder Woman getting fucked.>>149135
Dude, whoever you are, keep making these and get someone to color and ink them and you'll be an Erotica Legend... or something

>>149721
Thanks for all the positive feedback! Going to go ahead and finish up posting the rest of this chapter. Keep the comments coming!

And that's the end of that chapter. Again, feel free to leave any comments/crit/questions! Thanks!

Hot enough, I can definitely get behind the mindbreak. But with WW you need some real bondage. Also you need to get these colored and inked, stat

Meh, I don't know just how much of it is traced or not, but yeah, this is still rather hot.

I would like to see a story about this though, the comic feels rushed, and I think that in a story there would be more of a chance to develop Wonder Woman's corruption, make it be a lot more interesting and sexy.