Jane and Jake might be.

>>62889
Yeah, and the meteor might have crashed into Cthulhu while we weren't watching.
Just assuming offscreen deaths doesn't seem very reasonable to me.

>>62887

As >>62888 said, there's still plenty chance for all the Alpha Teens to make it into the game. Roxy and Dirk simply need to fend off Crocker Drones while they do it. Plus, it's smack-in-the-face obvious that SBURB is up to and beyond its neck in weird time shenanigans and circumstantial simultaneity.

Just look at Jane's Dreamself Death and Dirk's finding out about it on Derse being something that happened "simultaneously" to both Jane and Dirk on Earth. Pretty sure that player's Dreamselves are "synchronized" in the game relative to when each enters from the Session's perspective, even if things don't match up perfectly back on Earth. After all, to the Session all of Earth's history is just a bunch of points to choose from, and SBURB and other software has been known to just do things across spacetime.

So, who's going to be Dirk's Server player? Seems like Jake will have to be it if Dirk wants his flushed plans to go through the way he has planned them. But then Roxy would be last in, and like Dirk it looks like she needs to get out fast. Bluh, what a mess.

So, if the Condesce didn't arrive at Earth until the time when Jane was entering Sburb, then who was Betty Crocker? It couldn't have been the Condesce since this update shows she wasn't around yet.

>>62886
No, but he played Dragon Age 2.

wait, so who was the Betty Crocker that gave jane her surname if the condesce hadn't arrived yet?

>>62895
Time shenanigans?

>>62895
She works for Lord English, so she may know some Time Majykks.

>>62895
It might not have been the Empress arriving, but rather just her ship + her forces.
After all, she did have a history of coming to planets under the guise of a peaceful ambassador, before taking it over.

So the Alternian Empire are actually the Combine?

the condesce IS crocker but she had to build up her massive drone army for a while. as it was it was just her. and taking on the entire planet alone, even with cool powers, is suicide.

>>62895

I totally answered this question, but I threw the answer over in the Ideas and Theories thread, since it's basically just my theory instead of a canonical answer.

Click only if you want to read my long winded protein chute expulsions.
>>62902

>generic army of minions approaching

And this is why reading Homestuck is like pulling teeth for me.

We KNOW the remaining R-Kids will fight through the Condesce's armies. We KNOW they'll enter the Medium. Why is this being dragged out? For Gog's sake, what is the point?

Hell, if Hussie had thrown a Subjuggulator or two into the Flash I would have gotten interested. That would have shown that the Condesce actually intends to kill them, rather than just being another Villain of the Year that leaves the story without ever speaking or doing anything non-generically-villainous.

Hell, Lord English himself hasn't done anything remotely interesting since he ate the Handmaid.

I may have missed something or be reading too much into one particular thing, but are we SURE the other kids are going to enter the session?

I'm referring to this from Jane's intro page:
Your name is JANE. As was previously mentioned, you are poised for an ELITE OPPORTUNITY to test the SBURB ALPHA. It is so elite in fact, you are the only of your kind invited to playtest!

>only one of your kind

wouldn't that mean she's the only human to enter or am I missing something?

>>62906
>invited to playtest

the other kids have copies of the alpha too

I assumed that Poppop would get prototyped AFTER entering the session, since post-entrance prototypings affect the sprite but not the rest of the game. Now that he is stuck in space and most likely wont get prototyped, who will it be? Lil Seb? Dad? GCat?

Also, Roxy and Dirk being in the future reveals something. The reasons Jane didn't believe their guardians were dead was because in her time they weren't. Rose and Dave were probably killed during the Empress' take over.

. . . Was that G'lb Golyb at Hellmurder Island?

Doc Scratch was the one who gave her to trollkind in post-scratch Alternia. But then she died, so this can't be the same Gl'b Golyb. Where did this one come from? I doubt it could have been a present from GCat . . .

Anyone else notice that when Jane is looking at the 'meteor' coming down you can see the Homestuck title floating next to the sun in the upper left corner?

Thought that was kind of a nice touch.

>>62906
The other kids are on Prospit and Derse too, meaning they'll enter.

>>62911
Either the Horrorterrors sent a new emissary to earth, or the Condesce somehow cloned her. Since the first has some grave implications concerning the allegiance of them tentaclebeasts, I hope it's the latter. I just really like the idea of the horrorterrors being, well, sorta not horribly murderous or working with LE :#

>>62914
But the horrorterrors do work with Lord English.

Though it is kind of hard to talk allegiances when we have hardly any clue about motivations of the forces at play.

Am I only one who repeatedly hears themes of Homestuck in King Crimson's songs?

>>62915
We don't really know that. All we know is that the Horrorterrors are trying to stop the creation of new universes, that LE devours universes after they die, and that something -or someone- is killing the Horrorterrors. That could imply a whole lot of things, ranging from "LE and the Horrorterrors are working together" to "the Horrorterrors and LE are enemies."

Personally, I don't really want them to work together. Based on what we know, the Horrorterrors are opposed in every way to Sburb and BSlick. English, on the other hand, is reliant on this act of creation to survive, or whatever he gains by eating all those universes. Not to mention that LE is the most likely to be the one who is killing the Horrorterrors.

>>62918
But the horrorterrors aided LE on several occasions, seem to have worked with Scratch to manipulate Rose and the rest of our heroes.

>>62905

When the hell did he eat the Handmaid

>>62918
>that LE devours universes after they die
You know, about that...
Am I mistaken in thinking that the only reference to him "devouring" universes was this:
>He has the entire cadaver of the expired universe to pick apart at his whim. From its birth through its swelling maturity and tapering decay.
http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6&p=003992

Cause that always sounded more like a metaphor for "do whatever the fuck he likes in it" to me.
Although what with the universes literally being frogs I guess he could, also literally, eat them. Lord French much?

>>62921
Addendum:
Found another description to what LE does.
>Doc Scratch, like Bec, is a virtually omnipotent being, with all the same powers. Unlike Bec, he is an intelligent host to those powers, and is therefore also omniscient. His job is to pave the way for the arrival of his employer, an indestructible time traveling demon called Lord English. Lord English can only enter a universe upon its death, at which point he travels back in time to an earlier point in the universe's lifespan to assume leadership of his gang of mobsters called The Felt.
http://www.mspaintadventures.com/?s=6&p=005138
No mention of any universe-devouring.

Two down...

>>62924
Anybody translate the Daedric/Trollian yet? He, a little lazy to do it myself.

>>62925
If history is any judge, it probably means "BUT NOT MANY."

>>62926
Ynam ton tub.
So yeah.
But not many.

so, we getting another hussbot intermission?

>>62932
he is going to be dressed as kamen rider

>>62934
I'm thinking Dirk's wifebeater outfit

Could also be calmasis. Although that might be too close to that felt outfit he wore at one point.

>>62934
I hear tell it's spelled "common"

>fresh from the butler

Ewwww.

I completely forgot about the baby bird thing

Oh my god I can't breathe, this is hilarious, of course he'd canonize that one question, oh my goddd...

I guess we get a better idea as to what UU is wearing, at least. That's pretty cool.
And what's with Slick's new robot eye???

>>62942
he was in the universe when it blue up

it's not strange that he'd need some rebuilding

Arthour looks so happy :D

>>62936
You are Lord of the Ridiculously Close Guesses.

>>62942
First is the robotic left arm and now it's the robotic right arm and face. By the type this story is over he will be fully agumented into a cyborg killer.

Also it seems to be time for a new thread?

Ms. Paint is such a sweetheart~

ack is it time for the new thread yet

Liquorice soup sound pretty gross to me, but at least Slick is in Butler Heaven.

>>62948
Explains why Arthur's there.

>>62947
You know, that picture would have made a lovely 135 header, but then you had to go post it. d:

More to the point: How did Slick get here? Unless Hussie's Avatar nabbed him for rehab through some fifth wall shenanigan, I don't know how else he could have escaped after shooting Snowman.

*shrug*

>>62950
Hussie will probably show us how he and Ms. Paint ended up there.

>>62950
I know, I'm sorry! It was done in the white-hot grip of Update Fever. You understand.

(But I think the scottie-origami would be just as nice.)