I've come to the conclusion that I give 0 fucks about my second oldest sister. Just... None at all. She's a pathological liar that as soon as she finds a dick suddenly none of our family matters and we're all dirt under her high and mighty shoes. So yeah. I am 100% done.

Part of me thinks I should feel guilty for this. Like.... She's my sister. I'm supposed to love her and shit but god I really just don't like her and want nothing to do with her. I am so apathetic and I feel good I have one less thing/person to think about.

CONFLICTING EMOOOOOOTIONS

>Want to talk to my Crush
Aisha Tyler isn't going to talk to you anyway, Moe.

You're being too efficient, you're slightly ahead of everyone else.

Take a few hours off.

So I've been saving some of the bottle caps off of the beer I've been drinking and making little patterns with them out of boredom.
I'm not very artistic, but six-sided/hexagonal patterns kind of emerge naturally if you keep everything symmetrical, as six bottle caps fit perfectly around one.

I think I'll add to this tonight.

>>379866
Sometimes Family is the aspect of your life which holds you back the most. To truly find oneself, one must reject familial ties to concentrate. They can be a source of great comfort and joy, but it is usually in the lap of comfort where we stagnate the most.

This is not just you, it is an aspect of your sister which drives you crazy. Obviously, you should strive to not let this get to you, but she needs to be more considerate of those around her as well. Sometimes it takes a kind of break with someone you are close to to drive a point home to another person about their behaviour.

>>379866
I did the same thing with my brother, it's been like, 5 years since I had anything to do with him and it couldn't make me happier.

>>379866
I feel the same toward my youngest sister. Every family has a black sheep.

>>379872
More pictures, man. Put your alcoholism to good use.

>>379878
Sometimes I feel like I am the black sheep. What do you do in that situation?

>>379879
That really depends on why you're the black sheep. Most black sheep I've talked to just decided not to care. You're different from your family, for good or ill. Just go with it.

>>379881
They don't think my depression and anxiety is real. I'm treated like an invalid, even by my younger siblings. Every one of my interests is "stupid". Nothing I do impresses them.

>>379883
I'm sorry to hear that.
There are a number of free services to help people with depression get by day to day, including suicide hotlines and free support groups that may be held near where you live. Though, perhaps you knew this already, and also the helpfulness of free services will vary. Even so, simply having someone to vent to can provide some level of comfort if you're ever in a crisis, though that varies as well depending on who's on the other end.
Do you have some kind of support system/supportive circle of friends outside your family? I didn't, and not learning/being able to find and maintain mutually supportive friendships was perhaps my biggest mistake, moreso than any failed treatment plan, though I recognize that this isn't always achievable either
Also, though it's easier said than done, I'd try to be more okay with the fact that your own needs and desires don't need to correspond with your family's expectations.
Wish I could offer more, but I'll be rooting for you.

>>379878
Sure, why not.
This is somewhat of an early attempt at something.

>Waiting at bus stop
>girl tells me I smell good

HELP

>>379875

This happened DURING a 'break'. She used to live with us, having everyone pay for her stuff for her AND her baby while acting like a bitch the whole time. Then she got a boyfriend, moved in with him within two months, and now they're engaged. They haven't even been together for a year. I think they've only been with each other for 6 months.

>>379876

God I wish I could go 5 years without hearing from/about her. But she has a baby and won't let us see him much so mom keeps whining about it. That and she apparently shit talked us so bad that her fiance refuses our calls and has threatened us. Thanks bitch.

She can go fuck herself.

>>379889
Repeat whatever it was that made you smell that way. Unless she was drooling. In that case she's a cannibal.

>>379883
It hurts, but if they aren't willing to try to understand and treat you that way, drop them. You didn't ask to join them, and even if they did a decent job of rearing you, you shouldn't be paying them back by taking abuse. It's not going to be easy, but you'll be much happier.

I'm the "black sheep" in that I'm not the least bit religious, where the rest of my immediate family ranges from Sunday Christian to an actual pastor (my dad). Still, my parents don't bug me to go to church or accept Jesus, nor does anyone make fun of me, but without having that common religious thread we share little else in common so I don't visit any of them often. (My sister lives in the area and I help her out when she needs it, but that's it.)

>>379887
Looks like a neat way to pass time; certainly, there are worse hobbies (or just none at all, like me). And, hey, if you can stick to one brand for bottle cap art (or, better yet, a 3D sculpture), you might be able to sell it to that company for some decent cash.

i become incredibly despondent whenever i come home for extended periods

feels sad, man

>grab hot part of soldering iron with left hand (yes it was dumb)
>two massive blisters on thumb and index finger
>pop both so i get use of hand back
>promise to babysit the popped blisters so they don't get infected
>going away event for a girl i love at the beach
>says i need to join her in the water
>fuckitwhynot.jpg
>both blisters swollen and infected
>smell of death
>continually cleaning them out with antiseptic and applying new triple antibiotic/band aids
>thumb finally not smelling of death (as much)
>index finger swelling to blister size

it was worth it to the sheer joy in her face of getting to play with me in the water
i'd do it again every fucking time
because i'm a bloody fool

>>379897

>popping blisters instead of cutting off the affected limbs entirely
>2012

>>379862
The night is truly dark and full of terrors.

>>379897
Think about what happened.

>body is hurt beyond easy repair
>orders dermal cells to secrete plasma (liquid part of blood) to cushion area as it repairs
>some asshole rips off the protective covering
>plasma leaks out
>damaged and secreting cells exposed to air
>the same asshole DUNKS the affected area into a soup of bacteria and microorganisms

You know, if this was before modern medicine, you would have leprosy now.

I thought salt water was supposed to be good for fighting off bacteria. Or is that only epson salt water?

>>379903
>>379900
you guys are more than i deserve~

>>379905
I'd hug you with my arms, but they fell off because I picked at scabs and got leprosy.

>>379904
the ocean is filled with lifeforms that have perfectly adapted to living in salty environments. a highly tonic bodily fluid is a happy place for a mighty warrior.

>>379906
chest-bump it out, bby

people who are super adamant about the death penalty are easily the grossest people you will ever have the displeasure of knowing

>>379919
Co-workers getting to you again, Nurse?

>>379921
Wait, are those the car guys or the plane guys?

>>379919
ON THIS WE CAN AGREE

>>379920
Well it's a saturday so thats impossible. i was just reading about floridas new (hint super gross) death penalty laws and surprise they're horrifying and i made the mistake of peeking into the comment sections and dear god in heaven why

So even though the genetic counselor I went to accepted my insurance, it turns out I have a ridiculously high separate out of network deductible and owe $600.

God fucking damn it.

>>379919
We should use the system of banishment practiced among early indo-european civilizations. A criminal is banished and given time to leave the kingdom, if he doesn't leave in the proscribed time it becomes legal to kill/enslave him.

/argument

I know an F1 pilot in real life.

I have before he was even in Formula 1.
...He was in the GP2 but
Still!
Shits fucking cool.
Quite the revelation.
But fuckin cool.

>Have to do several pages of math homework
>And memorize how to make a couple dozen sandwiches
>And want to build a D&D campaign
>...
>Masturbate for six hours instead

I have no one to blame but myself.

Am I still banned? Why the fuck was I banned I didnt even doanything

>>379934
It happens sometimes.

>>379934
they heard about your shitty friends and were worried you'd bring them

>>379934
I'm gonna assume a mod hit the nuke bottom on a bunch of IP addresses to stop that spam bot porn flood, s'only a guess though.

It just hit me that it's Father's Day. So it's the first real Father's Day without my dad.

I'm just gonna.... Go sleep for a long time. Yeah.

>>379939
take care of yourself. <3

>>379939
You should do something for him.

>>379937
i don t have shitty friends anymore fortunately. i did finally ditch the one and now ive got four really awesome friends instead which is pretty nice

>>379945
Most of my likable friends don't know each other. I just have to put up with butts to see each person.

So Google announced it will be collecting CP images.

Isn't that illegal?

sudden need to pull away from all social media and electronic communication except for plus4chan (my safe place) activated. phone off, iPod off. iPad off. deleted social apps. signed out of gmail, facebook, etc.

ugh...

this day is a crappy day.

My friend's period is late and she's panicking and all I'm doing is cracking jokes in my texts because nobody ever taught me how to treat someone who's dealing with this kind of stress.

>>379953
Tell me about it ya shit.

>>379954
>love
>family
>duty
no
no details for anyone
i just want to pizza

getting drunk. ask me anything and i'll come up with beautiful lies.

also i'm desperately looking for distractions called classic doctor who and omg it's like i'm in an old fashioned b-horror movie written by british screenplay writers.

this is the blurst.

guys look i digitally painted a butt

>>379887
>>379894
Thank you, both of you. I'm in therapy, but in order to start feeling better, I need to have my family cooperate with me and work with me to make my life a less stressful place, and honestly, I don't think they're willing to do so long-term. I don't have a group of friends I get to talk to very much offline, so if I were to leave home, I don't know where I'd go.

and now i've sobered up enough to run errands
clear head
ugh.

>>friend thinks that any problem that isn't money-related is "petty white people problems, suck it up and get over it"

I don't know how to feel about this.

>>379963
They probably just mean its a problem that has a solution available to you.

The alternative would be "system is against you - 3rd world people problems" where there is no solution other than sucking it up and just die or something.

I don't care about Trisha Hershberger as a person but holy shit she's shaped like a One Piece character.

>>379964
The thing is, I was asking her how to deal with someone in my life who is very passive-aggressive and verbally abusive, and her response was that as long as I was financially stable, my life cannot have problems, and I am a whiny bitch if I complain about anything.

>>379931
wait... all the way through? in one go?

Lately I haven't been feeling particularly fulfilled by this lifestyle I have been living basically since high school. It assures money on some level but sufficient money means climbing the ranks in places I generally don't care about.

I mean, if I really cared I wouldn't let my bad habits stand in the way so much. The problem is, I think the bad habits are tied to the job, and in turn tied to the lifestyle. The biggest problem I encounter with trying to quit those habits is that there isn't a lot of reason to quit. You stop smoking weed for like a month and yeah you're slightly sharper most of the time but not really sharper enough that it makes a grand difference in overall happiness or quality of life. I've never really rock-bottomed in a way that made climbing out an absolute necessity. A general, vague necessity defined by some half imagined dream isn't concrete enough to leverage against oneself for true change. Which saddens me but it's like, I'm the only one stopping myself from pursuing that dream, whatever it is.

FEMALES/MALES

>>379963
Relate every problem to money.

>>379960
Move out.

>>379980
I've been told that if I do before I'm allowed to, I can count on not being able to go back to college and not seeing my family again.

>>379981
> I can count on not being able to go back to college
I assume your parents are footing the bill, then? It might be important to ask yourself A) do you really need to go to college, and B) if so, can you get a job to work it off yourself?

>and not seeing my family again.
From what little I know of your situation, that sounds like an improvement.

While you may have no friends offline, you're welcome to post as much about your situation as you're willing here and a lot of people will try to guide you to a better life.

My country banned sex robots.

>>379987
Oh sorry, they're just introducing the legislation. It's expected to pass though, because some company makes child sex robots.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HGSVYgcy24Q

>>379988
I wish "disgusting" would stop being treated as a synonym for "illegal".

>My country banned sex robots.
>because some company makes child sex robots.

I wonder what the market is for a sex robot in the shape of a child.
Pedophiles, right? You'd think.
So what would a pedophile DO with a sex robot in the shape of a child?
Probably have sex with it, right? You'd think.
And what are they NOT doing while they are having sex with the sex robot in the shape of a child?
Having sex with REAL children? Pretty sure.

Oh wait, I know. Let's BAN them! A brilliant idea! Get rid of all the shotacon/lolicon while we're at it. Because they only way to get rid of an undesirable behavior isn't redirecting it, but repressing it completely. Because that's always worked out so well.

>>379981
I don't know if my opinion counts for anything--I'm no expert on family or finacial matters--but as someone who is very aware of how debilitating depression can be, I'd feel a bit better if you got your depression to a manageable level before doing anything "drastic."
Or at least think about it. If the situation of being on your own would motivate you, it may be beneficial to move out regardless. But I'm sure you're aware by this point that depression has a very negative effect on motivation.
I believe you mentioned you're in therapy?
I hope you find your therapist helpful--you won't always get a good match, as different styles of therapy are more helpful to some than others. Even so, I'd still suggest trying to get a support system outside of therapy and the internet to supplement your recovery (I still have a huge amount of difficulty with this, so I don't really have any suggestions), as they may be more reliable and the relationship won't be as likely to be hindered by a lack of funding.
Best of luck, whatever you decide.

>>379981
>not being able to go back to college
You don't need college, being honest here. Having spent 20k on a bachelors I can tell you that your job prospects are as good as 4 years of experience in the workplace would get you.
Just look at the NSA whistleblower Snowden. Dude got a GED, no further, and ended up working for a 100k job.

>not seeing my family again
That's BS. Your parents can refuse to see you but you can still keep in touch with everyone else. Especially once people realize you moved away to maintain your sanity.

>>379994
>Having spent 20k on a bachelors I can tell you that your job prospects are as good as 4 years of experience in the workplace would get you.

good fucking luck getting into the workplace if you have nothing but a high school diploma. sure there are people who don't go to college and end up making big money, but for every one of them there are like a million other people who never get there and work shitty mcdonalds type jobs until they retire. of course there are college graduates who are working as cashiers too but your chances of getting a job you actually want that pays well is higher with a university degree + the networking you do in university.

it's different if you want to work in trades (like a carpenter or plumber or something) or be a writer (nobody gives a shit about a degree in english) or have NO IDEA WHAT YOU WANT TO DO so you majored in geography just to get a bachelor's degree in SOMETHING. but like, business? science? those are useful degrees. if you want a career in one of those fields you should seriously consider university.

ferro if we were IRL science buddies I would share this on your FB wall

>>379998
you get fist bumps
lots of fist bumps

this'll have to do in a pinch

Not being able to face truly leads to a constant state of spaghetti.

My life has fallen apart, but it's okay!

I was onion soup.
Oh god if I could have one thing right now I would want onion soup.

>TFW Kanyette is going to make more money before she is a week od than you'll ever make in your entire lifetime

When I was a very, very young boy, my mom gave me a bucket full of old, dry beans that my sisters and I would play with.
She cooked dinner for me today. She then informed me that she kept those beans all these years, and I just finished eating them.
They didn't taste funny, but even so, they had to be at least 25 years old.
Am I going to be okay?

>>380005
Everything I can find with a quick google says that, when hermatically sealed from oxygen and out of sunlight, you can expect 8-10 years shelf life for dried beans.

That didn't happen here.

However, everything else I read said nothing about illness from eating old beans; what they did say is that beans that old would not absorb water and have some other properties that would make them not taste normal or have a normal texture.

So if the beans you ate didn't taste/feel funny at all, she's pulling your leg.

>>379997
That has more to do with the fact that they don't have drive, than any lack of intelligence. People without drive don't do secondary education, so the statistics are skewed. However it's possible, even easy, for a person WITH drive to make it without a degree.
In USA, Canada and Britain something like 60% of the workplace is service industry, 20% resource industry and 20% manufacturing. So even if you don't fall in the "doctor" pool of the 60% you still have a huge amount of jobs to choose from.

I have friends who after high school got right into vocational, and now have a house, two cars, wife, kids.... I'm over here alone in an apartment barely meeting my debt interest.
College is not the road to happiness that parents keep saying it is, they just want to live vicariously through you.

>>380005
Well archaeologists found edible grains from 5000 years ago found in Iraq, so it depends on the packaging I would guess.

>when your boyfriends sleazy friend likes to undress you with his eyes when he's drunk and talks about how 'everyone else' says I'm way out of my boyfriend's league while cheating on my other friend he is dating

wait there's no possible image to represent the buckets of oozing sleaze dripping down my face

>>380006
I see.
And by "funny" I meant that they didn't really taste bad/rancid, but they were unusually hard and without flavor.
Thanks though. I've started to feel a bit weird, but it's not too bad, so I imagine I'll be okay.

>>380008
I used to think parents were just full of denial. Now sometimes I honestly believe they're actively trying to get their adult children into debt, because debt bondage makes them require an established place to live while they pay off that massive education debt.
It was a very cynical way to keep entire generations spinning their wheels on a treadmill and still require involvement by their elders and extended family, whom they would then owe favors or respect for having no choice.

I'm beginning to realize how very inflexible I am.
I should look for a yoga class...

I got a job. I go to school. I'm moving back in with my brother rather than my mom. I'm on medication for my illnesses. What the fuck is happening to me?

>>380010
If he refuses to use his eyes properly, remove them until he learns his lesson.

>>380014
Flexible slowpoke?

>>380002
Tell me more.

>>380019
Soon.

Fuck summer. Fuck it hard. My fan just died. It's too hot to go outside and buy a new one. I'm simmering in my own juices. Fuck summer. Fuck summer.

>>380026
Where do you live?

>>380026
>had about a fortnight of glorious, blazing, scorching summer weather
>followed by three or four days of torrential rain
>now it's just been cloudy, mild and slightly humid since then
>doesn't get properly dark
>bees, wasps and flies everywhere

>>380015
I'm glad stuff is looking up! Unless you dislike your brother. In which case I'm sorry for that particular detail but the rest is good!

>Flexible slowpoke?
Hopefully someday!

Welp, that's me 100% officially single. Feels weird man.

>>380032
Doesn't sound like it was too horrible a break up. You're weirdly calm.

>>380032
everything in time.

>>380033
It wasn't horrible at all, we're not like that. Not even bitter or angry. He noticed I had been distant for some time now, I admitted I wasn't content being in the relationship even though I did still care for him considerably, he asked me a few questions, we agreed a few terms, he said goodbye and good luck, I said so long and thanks for all the fish, and then we made it official. It was very civil. The whole thing took about ten minutes, I was teary for about half of it, now I feel perfectly okay if not a little sad because I was kinda hoping we could still be fuck buddies.

And so ends the chapter on my first love.

When something bad happens to someone, I generally respond "I'm sorry that that happened, I hope things improve for you," or something along that vein. Recently I've had people getting really curious or defensive when I do so, like asking why I'm sorry if it's not my fault, or saying stuff like "don't take it personally" when I'm not.

>>380026

Spring/Summer are the worst seasons.

I live at the skirts of a fresh, cool forestal mountain and a nice height off ground level and have a large assortment of light, summer clothes.

I'm okay during the summer.

BLAZING IT UP AT THE SANDY YAYO CHRONIC-CON?
BITCH I MIGHT BE

any cosplayers on this site? may need suggestions for purchasing/fashioning components for costumes

>>380041
I'm planning on cosplaying, but I'm in the same boat.

guys what catchy slogan should i paint on the back of my denim jacket?

>>380041
Hidely-ho! I'm no expert, (no seriously I cannot stress that enough) but might be able to help. I've been cosplaying off and on for four years and I had a job working in a costume shop for a while. What's up?

>>380044
"Touch Me and You Die."

>>380044
V E N G E A N C E

and then get a helmet

>>380045
whew. okay.

things i would like to replace on my old nightwing costume:
customizable boots with pouches (might be easier than using the storage gauntlets)
new gloves (maybe with storage gauntlets)
new mask... material etc unknown. something solid might be preferable. still have to acquire spirit gum.
and... new eskrima sticks with blue LEDs on the end to look like his stupid lightning sticks.

>Find an angry typed notecard on my car about me parking on the sidewalk which I have never done
>Next morning I find the hood was keyed.
Well...fuck.

Good:
> Find ten bucks at work
> See first damselflies of the summer
> Rescue two of them at a Safeway on the way home

Bad:
> Spent two hundred fucking dollars in an hour and a half
> Almost get slammed into by a cop car
> Almost hit a goose for the second time in the last week, bastard pulls up at last second, barely makes windshield
> Goose in question shits on ceiling window, whatever it's called.
> Robin that has been harassing us for the last month has doubled its efforts in being a little faggot, has started shitting directly on windows and door handles.
> Fucking attacks my sister and tries to get into her car as she opens it.

>>380053
Damselfly is your spirit animal. Robin is your sisters spirit animal.

I'm 1/18th native american, trust me.

>>380055
I'm a quarter to one-sixth.

>>380056
Wait, what the. Why is my trip changed?

>>380056
Your great great grandparent was a damselfly?

>>380049
for the mask you should consider trying a material called wonderflex. shit's pretty solid but will become workable with a hair dryer or even really hot water

hell its so low melt you could probably mould it directly onto your face*

*melting things onto your face may not be such a good idea

>>380058
wait never mind, i derped

Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill! was really fun.

>>380049
The boots issue can be dealt with by making bootcovers for any old pair of boots. Start with Goodwill or any thrift store for the boots themselves. http://firelilycosplay.deviantart.com/art/No-Stretch-Boot-Cover-Tutorial-161626176 This is the first thing that came up on google for "cosplay boot covers tutorial." I once tried and failed spectacularly to make boots, so the only things I can tell you for sure are 1) buy a base of some kind, don't cobble your own, and 2) don't save it for the night before the con. Nothing makes you grumpy like shuffling around in flip flop bottoms half-epoxied to stretch fabric in the wee hours of the morning. It was a dark time in my life.

Domino and masquerade masks are available from a variety of costume retailers, and they can be altered pretty easily. Another idea would be to attach a domino mask to a hockey mask and carve off the excess until it's Nightwing-shaped.

As for the rest of it...I'm not really sure. Sorry. You could find a pair of gloves that look like his and then sew pouches to them? Maybe? I've never really had to alter gloves, and I had to google eskrima to find out what it was.

As a general note to anyone reading this, thrift stores and dollar stores are your friends. Last Halloween I organized a group of six Ghostbusters, and the bulk of our proton packs came from shit we found at Dollar General.

I hope some of this was helpful.

I want to cosplay but I don't look like any characters I know and there are no (not totally shitty) cons In Scotland. ;_;

>been e-mailing back and forth with bigwig
>arguging about how stagnant our own field is becoming
>he said to call him by his first name

I...is this sex?

>>380062
thanks! i'm looking at something on the goodwill site on auction right now. :]

also this: http://cosplaytutorial.com/list.php

someone just sent me this as a resource. she's a foam lover. swears by it. i'm... momentarily skeptical but i won't shoot it down if it works for storage gauntlets.

>>380064
that's the anticipation stage
sex is when you start doing transformational research or write essays in important journals together

>>380066

We're thinking about starting our own journal

>>380067
jesus. go get a dog together already.

>>380067
i'm really happy for you. that's badass.

Has anyone ever tried to do a "meta" (human) language? Something that you wouldn't actually use in talking/writing, but is an attempt to make a subset of most languages such that it could be easily translated by a computer into any language. It would lack flourish and poetic license, but it would be understandable by everyone involved.

>>380064
You're asking the wrong website...

...actually, now that I think about it, the amount of general virgin misery here seems to be far less proportional than the motherboard. Perhaps +4 folk are more likely to have had teh sex? (We seem to have more women/minorities/homosexuals by %, at least in appearance.) Or the virgins (le me) don't complain/mention it as much?

>>380070
Lojban? Esparanto?

>>380070
Yeah, that sounds pretty much like Esperanto. Fun fact: Esperanto was the proposed language of the League of Nations and it was to be taught in the state schools of all LoN members, but the decision had to be unanimous and France voted against it because they didn't want to lose their position as the international language at the time. Now we have don't a neat unifying language nor is even French relevant. Thanks France, you shower of bastards.

>>380072
Both of those are idealized and rigid formal languages for human communication (at least, lojban seems so, I haven't heard of that before.). I'm thinking something of a digital or pictorial construct that would be used as an intermediary by computers to translate, with language->construct->language instead of language->language, ideally giving a much better (and, perhaps, faster) translation. Or, the construct could be stored in QR codes, and when someone scans it on their phone it would appear in their own language.

Someone pointed me to this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blissymbols It's completely pictorial and highly interesting, but it's purpose is in training humans in language, not machines, so it's not quite what I was thinking of.

>>380074
Glyphs

>>380075
Still pictorial; glyphs and cave writing eventually evolved into the characters we know today. I'm trying to think in a more "abstract" way, though I admit that being able to define/explain such a concept would be quite hard.

>Random book from the library
>"Wow this is some awesome world building and I like the main characters this book is pretty cool"
>Sudden off-screen gang rape of only main female character out of no where

WELP that wrecked my night

This guy and I have been friends for about a year and a half, and we've been involved for over a year now. Even now that I've graduated and we're 3000 miles apart, it's still going. We hang out whenever possible, stay up until 5am looking at dumb internet things, talk about our personal problems, and have wild sex. But only with each other. We are very exclusively Not Dating. I told him so. We even had an "I don't love you" "And I don't love you" moment a couple months ago. He's not my boyfriend. And yet...I have this sneaking suspicion that I may have accidentally a serious long term relationship. Is this some anime bullshit? Now that I've written it out, it seems like some anime bullshit.

>>380044
You should do it up like Billy Kane, of course.

>>380079
that would imply anime would be interesting at a human level.

>>380063
When I was 14, I cosplayed as Simon from Gurren Lagann.
I looked just like him, I swear to god it was uncanny.

...
...But the con itself was pure, PURE PUTRID SHITE.
Shitty 'exclusive' atmosphere, indifference to cosplayers, and horrid artists. *I* at 14 was better than the ones expositing.
I don't have any pictures of my costume though.
Maybe I got taken some. I don't remember being asked to pose or me taking any. But there might've been pictures going on.

I promised myself I'd cosplay as post-timeskip Simon at 21, too.

I swear to god I'm not bullshitting here

>>380063
you have other options like gothic lolita or generic fantasy era if you don't want to be particular member of house stark character

I've only closet cosplayed before. This year, I'm going to look for pre-made parts for a costume, and maybe next year, I'll learn to sew.

It's a little daunting, because I don't know where to look, or how much it'll cost.

>>380082
>When I was 14, I cosplayed as Simon from Gurren Lagann.

Oh God, I'm so fucking old. Gurren Lagann is still recent to me.

So I've been reading pre-seduction of Innocents romance comics and I am flabbergasted by how much Seduction of Innocents really did destroy a diverse and complex industry with wide demographics.

They had REALLY valuable lessons that you just don't hear in damn near anything.

Fuck you, spammer bot, fuck you hard.

>feel gross
>take a shower
>10 minutes later
>drenched in sweat again
It can't be reiterated enough just how much summer can go fuck itself.

>sit in front of desktop
>eat fud
>type away
>somebody taps me on the hand twice
>HOLYSHITWHOISTHATOHMYGODIDIDN'THEARANYONEAPPROACHISTHISAGHOST
>it's only my cat, asking for some attention
>using family Apple computer, so no mfw
:(

>>380089
Everyone I've asked says they'd prefer it to be too cold than too hot. I'm the only person I know that prefers it the other way around.

I wish the daily thoughts of suicide would leave my mind

Men’s Wearhouse fired George Zimmer.

NOBODY TELL 4CHAN. They’ll be crushed.

(If there’s anyone around there who actually remembers the old George Zimmer memes, anyway.)

>>380094
Join the club.
And I mean that in a comforting "you're not alone" way, and not in a dismissive way.
There are some resources available, as mentioned earlier, like hotlines and support groups and stuff. Their helpfulness varies, but it's something at least. If you have money, there are some newer treatments like TMS and DBS available. Also ECT, but my experience with that was pretty awful.
Best of luck.

>>380094
don't i know it.
it isn't rational. it doesn't make sense. it feels real. and it's pointless.
no spoilers. i want to acknowledge (again) that i have those, too. a waste of time, energy, and hope.

I'm reminding you that this movie exists. I keep forgeting myself.

Honestly though, this movie scares the hell out of me.

>>380092
Fud is slang for pussy here.

>>380102
i doubt he hate that.
omg it's been almost a year since i had any fud please kill me
about 2 months since any romance at all
6 months since kisses

...

how has my life gone so wrong. someone attractive and intelligent female who wishes to make with the fun times. please come find me. sense of humor is greatly preferred.

sage for bitchin'

>>380103
>ATE
kill me

>>380103
You know, we could kill two birds with one stone if you'd just come cum over here already. Imagine the bragging rights of an international booty call.

>>380105
rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr i hear scottish people are quite talented

>>380106
I can't speak for all of us but I sure as fuck am.

>>380103
>omg it's been almost a year since i had any fud please kill me
>almost a year
>a year
>year
>

>>380109
I AM A MAN
I HAVE NEEDS

>>380110
GOML.

>>380112
that would require me to dial back a good dozen levels and change my class to wizard

>>380113
I haven't earned enough XP for Wizard yet. :(

>>380105
spending thousands of dollars to fuck someone sounds an awful lot like prostitution

>>380116
No-more than paying gas to drive to a fuck buddy's house. Besides, prostitution is legal in Scotland anyway with it being - y'know - a decent and civilised country.

>>380099
>>380098
He was arguably the least scary thing in that film compared to the likes of the wheelers, the Princess with her collection of severed living heads, the Nome King.

>>380117
Scotland must have one fuckhuge gas crisis.

>>380087
I'd actually like to check out some of those.
It'd be interesting to see how that stuff was.

...I mean damn.
This is what fucked up most of the west comics-wise. Imagine the reality we'd live in had that shite not gone through....

>>380117
>prostitution is legal in Scotland anyway with it being - y'know - a decent and civilised country
Sexist!

I think its weird...
The Prettiest girl I've met in my entire life is incredibly... well, the opposite of photogenic.

Or maybe its just that the photos don't do her justice. Knowing her in real life and all.
Its odd cos, with other good looking people, photogeneticism comes hand in hand with their looks.
Yknow, like tooth, andrei, myself, some friends from the different schools I've been to... but hm. I don't know what it is.

It's alright so hot outside. Why did I eat this spicy baked potato? Now I'm hot from the outside and from the inside. I'm an idiot.

>>380117
>Besides, prostitution is legal in Scotland anyway with it being - y'know - a decent and civilised country.

I'm pretty sure nothing about Scotland could at any time be described as "decent" or "civilized."

>>380130
Pheromones?

>>380130
I actually look 7654567 times better on film and in photos. I am the very definition of photogenic.

>>380134
Aren't you American?

>>380136
Nebraska is only technically America. It's otherwise wasteland.

>>380138
Well then he can sit the fuck down, trying to talk about "decent" and "civilised" with me.

>>380130
i look terrible in photos, but enough people on streetcorners have hollered marriage proposals my way to convince me that I'm pretty hot stuff in reality.

>>380139

I'm sorry, how could I possibly besmirch the... sterling reputation of the Scottish people.

well this thread is going places

>>380134
>if you can get your chin above the bar you're old enough to drink

speak for yourself

>>380145
>that movie was made in america
Go back to processed cheese and making buffalo extinct.

>>380062
boots almost acquired. boots will be in the mail soon. boots are looking nice. i'll be putting modified storage greaves or whatever over them. MORE POUCHES FOR THE POUCH GOD.

besides, i'll need to hold my phone and wallet somewhere.

Listening to The Last of Us soundtrack

So many tears...

>>380148

Are you implying that humorous jabs/criticisms of countries aren't valid if they come from another country?

Well hey, maybe you have a point, let me just focus more on the representation of Scottish people, BY Scottish people...

oh.

oh dear.

>>380157
it's a pot calling kettle etc
c'mon man.
please tell me this is just a game.

>open new factory sealed package of toilet paper
>two of the rolls are caked in what is clearly dry and hardened blood
Looks like someone kept quiet about their little accident in fear of losing their job. Still, how the fuck did these make it to shelves? I'm feeling a mixture of sadness, anger and utter revulsion. It is a very complicated feeling.

>>380158

Precisely my point, Ferrous Fellow!

I'm personally offended at how attractive Alia Shawkat is. It isn't fucking fair.

>>380159
There's a Mexican somewhere with an amputated arm because the workplace wound on his hand festered and he couldn't report it because he would lose his job.

Since he only has one working arm now, no factory will take him as a worker, and he is only doing the worst jobs cleaning gutters and the like.

Recently he took to drinking too much and is beating his wife, who has taken with another man because she feels a one armed man is less manly.

The only reason he stays with her is for his children.

>>380148
We also have a baseball stadium. It's really annoying lately.

>>380157

dont u dare shit talk the good name of sir billi

also scotland isnt real

>USA vs. Scotland

Guys, this isn't even a fair comparison. Scotland isn't a country.

It baffles me daily that there are people who just straight up refuse to understand the concept of cis/trans. Like...it's not even complicated. It's not Derrida. Speaking as a cis person, it makes perfect sense to me.

Can we put an instaban wordfilter on this cis/feminism horseshit?

>>380170
If you can find Anonex, you can ask him.

>>380170
Why?

>>380170
...dude, it's a SYM thread. If you don't want to read it, then don't read it.

>>380170
I think there's a wordfilter ap for Firefox that works on 4chan, not sure on this place.

The design of this website is quite different, you'd have to ask Anonex.

>>380172
lol you have to ask that

>>380174
Yes, I do.

>>380175
Please don't start shitstorms outside of the designated shitstorm thread. Ask there.

>>380176
I was under the impression that SYMs are where the shitstorms go.
Still, it was a pretty simple question, I don't think it would raise a fuss to answer it as long as everyone tried to be adult about it.

I DON'T SEE WHAT ANY OF THIS HAS TO DO WITH LEBRON JAMES

>>380160
okay
>>380165
>>380167
>>380168
lol

>>380170
No. Instead, question why people might be angry about these issues. Be sympathetic.

I have two summer jobs. One as a blogger for a liberal campaign site, one as community activist for the ACLU.

The transformation is complete.

>>380172
>>380175
>>380177
>>380180
Explain it to us, then, because I genuinely don't understand. Shitstorm & all.

No, really.

>>380183
"Cisgendered" is just "not transgendered". All transgendered people are generally asking for is to be called whatever gender they're transitioning to.

>>380183
If you're cisgender, your physical and mental sex match. If you're transgender, they don't. That's all. It's not a marker of goodness to be cis or trans; it's just a thing that you are. Apparently that Penny Arcade guy is really offended by the concept. My understanding is that people are trying to move away from the idea that what's common (i.e. being cis) is normal and therefore better than being trans. It's sort of like the distinction between different sexualities: noting the differences with terminology is just...noting the differences. I think? Somebody please correct me if I'm off the mark.

>>380185
It also depends on the transgendered person. For some, the transition is very important to them, and they're very open about it. For some, they would like everyone to believe they have always been [whatever they identify as].

>>380184
>>380185
I know what it is, I'm curious as to why Ninja requested it be an instaban-trigger.

>>380185
Except it's commonly used by Social Justice Warriors as a mark of their moral superiority and enlightenment about these issues. Since those people are often loud, active, and unreasonable, he's more offended by connotation it applies to the speaker's position than literal meaning.

>>380187
Because there are some people who don't believe transgendered people and females have problems and that they're just whiny people with a fetish for being pitied. Or that the evidence they're citing, anything traumatic that they went through for simply being themself, didn't actually happen.

It's getting to the point where I just want to opt out of debates altogether, because I am sick of this "boo hoo, I don't care because I haven't had to deal with this" nonsense.

sobriety is useless; the last thing i need is a good clear look at my life

>Rejected
>Have the shits

Yep okay now this week is officially bad.

this is spek your mind

if you wanna talk about cis transshit in your mind then by god no one should stop you

if other people wanna reply to that then fucking let them

and if you personally dont want to see it then go look at something else on the internet, or post whatever you want here irregardless of what others are posting, or start your own no cistransconversation allowed thread and i promise you literally no one will give a fuck no matter which of these options you choose

that easy

>>380193
bitch what did i tell you about ever going to plus4chan again

u guys have not changed a bit

>>380192

Is this the gal from the OP?

Also what did you eat.

the cis/trans discussion has been in both of the sex threads

that stuff is also what the fucking threads were made FOR (not to post pictures of stuff you think is hot)

why don't you to ctrl+f in one of them for "transgender" and read what's already been said instead of shitting up all the other threads asking what transgender means. there are really long explanations of what it's like. go read them if you're confused about it, and if you are still confused about it, post in the second thread or shut up

>>380197
>that stuff is also what the fucking threads were made FOR
Original thread was for fetishes IIRC....

>>380196
>Is this the gal from the OP?
Yeeeeep.
>Also what did you eat.
I just checked the new tea my mom got me and apparently it's a laxative.

yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.

>>380197

in both of the sex threads

in SYM

in offensive video game thread

in politics thread

in Nintendo thread

in Zelda thread

in /cog/ thread

it's like spam but it doesn't get deleted

guys did you know gender is a thing like wow holy crap this gender thing man it sure is a thing oh my bad I didn't mean to say guys and offend your gender

>>380201
you seem very upset

>>380200
Same as when my buddy kept drinking fennel tea and later found out it gave him boobs. Now he's a she.

Lets discuss transsexual things now, it's such a hip subject.

>>380200

>Yeeeeep.

I'm sorry for your l--

>I just checked the new tea my mom got me and apparently it's a laxative.

Okay, I laughed out loud.

Well hopefully when you remember this week in the future, you'll be reminded of the time your mom inadvertently tricked you into drinking laxative.

I hope you at least got a proper rejection. I didn't even get that last time.

The badness of this week hasn't even hit me yet. It's like a meteor that's still falling.

>have shitty paranoid socially anxious week with most of my support net leaving
>best friend and part time romantic interest without benefits checks in with me finally after a long hiatus. feel just a little more connected after a long week of near silence.
>former mentor and research partner comes out of nowhere to say "i love you" to me and gives me advice and support on authoring literature
>other positive interactions with researchers in various fields (ninja included)
>people still letting me know other nice things about me including things i shan't mention in public

okay. breakfast no hog, etc. i feel like i'm breathing again finally.

>>380201
*shrug*
i'm just cool with whatever man so long as no one is harshing the zen thing.

also i might be slightly gender queer but it's trivial since i don't feel out of place in my body expression so i never talk about it. there's probably a privilege joke in here that's not worth pursuing.

>>380201
It's time to step away. If it bothers you that fucking much.......

>>380208

But anon, where else am I going to get my daily fix of laughing at how hilariously bad nerds are at dealing with minor social problems?

>>380201
At the most, you've mildly frustrated me, but I'm not offended. I realize now that just explaining to you and others just where I'm coming from, you probably won't be dissuaded no matter what I say, and I'm going to accept that.

What has offended me is being told (at another website) that because I'm a feminist I'm okay with guys being raped, which pisses me off. Anybody being assaulted in any way is never cool.

please care about things

ninja's always been a bad poster though. it's one of the things he's good at.

>>380210
I never really got that whole telling other people what they think thing. Outside of text adventures, anyway.

>>380211
Can I pick, or will you do it for me?

>>380212

keep going

>>380213
It's just how I've always been. I guess. I got all passionate because I had this fear that, I dunno, I'd get a job at a company making video games, but people would tell me my work sucked on the basis that I was born with a vagina. Or something. I want people who think I suck to think I suck on the basis of my work, not on what I look like or my gender or my height or weight or whatever. When you're playing something I worked on, all you see and hear is my drawing or my writing or my animation or my music. And that's why I like games, they're this homogenous blend of the talents of a bunch of people. All with their own stuff to contribute.

>>380211
sure, but you can't make me be nice about it.

>>380169 here
good lord
I make one small post about something that confuses me
in a thread where I thought that was ok
come back the next day
what the hell guys
I made my tiny post ITT because I was SPECIFICALLY not trying to start a discussion or a shitstorm or whatever. If I had wanted discussion, I would have gone somewhere else, or started my own thread. I just wanted to say "hey this thing is WACK" in a SYM thread and have it get ignored because WHO ON EARTH WOULD CARE SO MUCH.
>>380201
>people care about thing I don't care about
maybe it keeps coming up because it's a thing people think is important/relevant
or maybe I'm a ghost
haunting you through the internet
making anonymous posts about gender in an attempt to specifically annoy you
soon I'll emerge from your screen like Jacob Marley
ooOooOooOooOoo

>>380222

ninja's just being a dumbass. don't worry about it.

How can some people sleep so soundly when they have an alarm clock right next to their head that's been blaring for over an hour?
Sometimes when I have an opportunity to sleep in, someone else's alarm clock will keep me up because they have the ability to sleep through and ignore it.
I should get some earplugs.

>>380201
It annoys me when I have no Snickers, and other people brag about having Snickers, which actually happens surprisingly often.
But I'm not quite so petty that I want people removed from a website because they're talking about legitimate things that I don't want them to talk about.
I just grumble to myself and buy some Snickers next time I'm in a position to.

I have little money right now, someone pls send Snickers

>>380225
Slowpoke is good people, and deserves a Snickers.

ninja doesn't give certain kinds of fucks and i kind a love that about ninja.
ninja is a bro
let's move on.

also, slowpoke does in fact deserve snickers.

also, i love you Moe.

I am gon' kiss you all if you don't behave.

>>380228
brb
never coming back to internet again

>ferrous fellow attempts to return to his home planet

>>380229
note: ferrous fellow died on the way back to his home planet

>>380230
he will be missed, rest in atoms, etceteras

>>380230
Of dysentery.

>>380232
What a shitty way to go.

>>380232

he died how he lived

>>380233
Y'know, I'd watch that TV show

>Sitting around
>Feeling glum
>Not angry, and not quite sad, but impervious to happy
>Eating expensive takeout
>Ignoring work
>Suddenly, I hear a voice

>"Stop feeling sorry for yourself!"

>Look around
>Nobody else is here

Just messaged a friend.
He replied
>Who the hell are you

...
i'm not the same person i used to be

>>380236
It was you from the future. And he didn't even stop to fuck. That's how desperate that message was.

>>380236
You were hallucinating. Seek help.

>>380070
>>380074
>>380076
I've tried making a language with a simple digital representation, but was more interested in communication producable by humans that could also be reliably recognized by fairly simple computers/robots than translation between human languages. For representing the language abstractly, I think you'd want to represent parse trees in some way: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parse_tree I think individual words could also be represented as a tree, though so far I've only mapped out some pronouns.

I'd say Sarus actually works pretty well as a digital language, since there are exactly seven sylables and breaks between words and no punctuation (sentences presumably seperated by multiple breaks in a row), so you could represent anything in Sarus as a string of three-bit groups, with maybe a fourth tacked on as a parity bit. The main problem with it is the way it tends to conflate a lot of concepts in a way that relies heavily on context to understand, so translations provided by it would likely be very imprecise. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sarus_(language)

And while I'm talking about languag stuff and also mentioning robots:
http://www.itee.uq.edu.au/lingodroids/
http://www.alear.eu/

ow my heart

>>380241
toldja what happens when you hand it to other people

>>380242
you told me stuff?

i'd make excuses but there's a right time and place for everything and this is not the time for me to be giving my heart. right person. wrong time.

hurts bad.

spoiler because it's not directed toward any of you and i don't know where to put this other than here which is one of my safe internet spaces where my friends who this is directed to can read it. this is more of a practice yell so that when i talk to them about my current problems with them, i'll know what not to say.

EHEM

i get very tired of people who talk but don't listen, especially those who won't shuttup for even a minute. i like to engage with people who are talking to me and be an active listener.

then some people come along under the guise of an engaged and sensitive human being and burn me the fuck out. keeps happening. i can't tune the fuckers out if they keep acting like they need me. it's getting to the point where i'm going to have to tell these people what they're doing wrong. i know what it's like to be anxious. lonely. unheard. eager to connect. but that's exactly what those fuckers are taking advantage of and i don't like being stepped all over when they don't even have anything of value to say. attention seeking half-people. asleep with their mouths open. i might as well be an imaginary friend.

i swear. some people just don't know the difference between being afraid of their own thoughts and being lonely. if you don't need me to be there to say the things you're saying and you don't want my input, for the love of god, deal with it without me. i'm not a tool for your monologues and i'm not a goddamned counselor. you pay counselors. you're supposed to listen to them when they guide you. jesus fucking christ, if you can't treat me like a person, leave me alone.

there. okay. i think i've got this.

>>380244
I've been on both sides of this.

I have dealt with people who clearly needed a psychologist, and needed me to act as one, but I couldn't tell them to find one, out of their insisting that psychiatrists = brainwashers.

On the other hand, I have been that lonely, anxious person who just needs someone to talk to. Lack of sympathy and skepticism (despite the fact that I was telling them the truth, stuff I hadn't been able to tell others out of fear) from someone I considered part of my support net has led me to be mostly silent to everyone the last couple of years. I can't vent anywhere but here now.

>>380245
>I have dealt with people who clearly needed a psychologist, and needed me to act as one, but I couldn't tell them to find one, out of their insisting that psychiatrists = brainwashers.

This is a perfect description of the most toxic friendship I've ever had. She needed a psychiatrist somethign awful, but she was afraid that the drugs they would give her would change her and make her worse to be around. (Unfortunately we HAD kind of seen this happen with another friend whose meds made him lose all sense of tact, so she did kind of have a reason to be cautious, which just made it worse.) So instead of actual psych medicine, she self-medicated with ecstasy and cough syrup. She'd let me know about it, all the ways she'd been hurting herself, all her feelings, all of her screwed up perspectives on life and people she knew. I'd stay up talking to her well into the night on school days because I was afraid she'd tie up a noose, and some days I never got sleep at all. At one point, things at her home got bad, and she came to live in my spare bedroom for a couple weeks while things blew over. And she was just... the most ungrateful little shit while she was there, she hardly ever spoke with anyone else in my house and did not thank my parents once for opening up their home to her. And we still had those 8 hour sessions where she'd talk about her feelings and I'd try to calm her down until the sun came up, and I had to do it on the fucking computer because she would not talk to me face to face and locked her door. I understood that she probably needed a barrier, that she wasn't comfortable saying these things out loud and was probably scared to. I got that. She was one of my oldest friends, and I could empathize with the shame and fear of looking into someone's eyes and telling them all about their demons.

But it wore me out, right to the bone. I was just a kid and I didn't know what to do but try to keep her treading water. The worry and lost sleep literally made me sick. It was pretty much every night we'd talk like that and we talked about nothing else after a while, and after she left my house and ceased talking to me for a while (I still don't know why) I realised we hadn't really been friends for a long time. I'd just been a human shaped wall she'd been rehashing the story of her life to for maybe two years. I'd never felt so used and betrayed, and I hated that I felt that way because I was her friend and she was mentally ill and it wasn't her fault and she needed someone and maybe eventually things would get better. When she finally came back to me and tried to start up the therapy sessions again, I basically told her to fuck off and come back when she was willing to treat me as a friend instead of a therapist again.

I haven't heard from her since.

Now that I think about it, that's around when I started to greatly prefer being in groups and fear being one-on-one with another person. I used to have the patience of a god for listening to others' issues and now I feel vaguely annoyed when they come to me. I just can't do it anymore. I still don't want to blame or resent her for these things either, and I don't want to place the blame for my personal problems on someone else, which is the worst part, because I know that this experience did cause damage and I do legitimately feel like she stole something from me that will take a very long time to get back, if I ever manage to. And I've always been a private person but I just do not want to do this to someone else, I do not ever want to take advantage of someone else and leech off them like my friend did, and so I just do not tell people anything anymore.

That's my story, I guess.

It's hard when you want to help the people you care about, but you can't even help yourself.

>>380246
Something very similar happened to me, so I know how exhausting that can be. I'm sorry you had to go through that.
In my case, I was dealing with a crippling depression of my own, and was forced to put my own problems on hold to help him through his out of fear that he'd follow through on his threats of killing himself.
After years of this, he finally overcame his depression. I didn't. He had started to grow on me once this happened. Despite my depression being far more severe, and despite my making doubly sure that I never complained or addressed it to avoid becoming overbearing like he did, he's the one who told me to fuck off upon learning that I was depressed, stating that I was weak and a waste of space. After all the years of effort and comfort and unconditional support I had poured into ensuring his well-being.
I've actually heard from him later, briefly thanking me for what I did for him, and wanting to forget what happened and go back to having me support him as his life became somewhat miserable again. I just dismissively thanked him for his kind words, let him know I wasn't going to back to the way things were, and haven't heard from him again.

I feel that I suffer from similar "aftermath" effects of feeling burnt out and at the same time not wanting to burden anyone.
In retrospect, I think the experience also contributed to an insecurity that I need to earn or be worthy of a relationship, considering that I worked my ass off in this one and was still rejected in the end. I haven't really been able to form friendships since.
I'm sorry that you've also recieved some damaging effects from your efforts--it's never a good feeling to have your kindness and benevolence rewarded with being treated like you're less than human.
I wish you all the best.

Why do you Americans do so many weird things with pizza? That's just not right.

wow. so many sympathetic souls on here.

i read everything you guys wrote about friends and burden and not wanting to do the same to others, falling back on not wanting to be used.

i keep going back to this notion here:
>>380247
maybe different words. take care of yourself first. that's not just allowed. it's the only way you'll stand a chance of really helping someone else. being someone's tool will do neither of you any good. people aren't crutches. we hold each other up, sure, but not to be stepped on or cast away.

i have a personal meditation i reflect on a lot. i never thought in all my life i'd post something from my journal here.

===========
feel the triggers
as a hammer on a revolver, catch them and let them gently withdraw to rest.

if you wish to respond with panic, choose patience.

if you wish to respond with fear, choose love.

if you wish to respond with paranoia, choose trust.

if you wish to react with clinging, choose space.

if you wish to react with pushing, choose openness.

and though you will feel anxiety and pain, choose to not suffer.

Addendum:

if you wish to respond with attention-seeking, choose to listen.

if you wish to ask for affirmation, work toward earning it.*

if you think you’re not important, remember who's important to you.


*it's actually okay to ask for affirmation. i just wanted to turn that desire into something actionable. action is important to me. thoughts, beliefs, and feelings are not enough.

>>380251
who the fuck told you about what i do with pizza?

>>380252
I feel that we're cognizant of this for the most part.
What I personally got out of
>>380246
>>380245
>>380250
is that we're frustrated as we find ourselves "punished" rather than rewarded when we exercise patience, trust, openness, etc.

--And by no means do I mean to categorize you guys (and me) as bitter or having given up or anything; I'm glad you were able to vent a bit. We all need to, and I sincerely wish you all better luck in future relationships.

Regardless, thanks for your input and sharing something personal.

>>380251
I like anchovies. Does that count as weird?

>>380244
>>380245
>>380246
>>380250
Gah, I think I'm becoming that person to my roommates. Most of us talking is just endless meandering things where I just prattle on. I have so much to get out and nowhere to put it. So I catch them up in highly theoretical conversations that they have no interest in and don't really want to play with. I think one of my roommates is actually already displeased with me, and perhaps a little frightened. I don't mean to come off sounding like a raving nut, I just do, I guess. And, I didn't want to frighten her, annoy her, or make her feel unsafe in her own home; I just have a problem filtering everything that goes through my head.

But the words have left my mouth, the moment has passed, and very little I can do will reshape her opinion of me. I should talk to somebody about it, really should. I know I should get help... I just, idk. Hang ups about telling people about my problems, when a lot of my life is spent explaining really complex problems to other people in simple terms. Wondering if hearing another old white man tell me what's wrong with me will do any better than my father trying to tell me. Wondering exactly what combination of my mannerisms seems to put so many women so far off. Wondering if love was is even worth it when all my previous partners have been someone I have had to conform to for attention and keep up a facade of interest to cover the fact that I didn't really love them at all, and the instant I let any part of that slip through they vanish into the night.

Wish I didn't have to change so much to stop feeling like a goddamn monster for just being me.

>>380255
I think the fact that you recognize that you're beginning to tax your roommates sets you apart from the people we complained about.

Nevertheless, if it's within your means to get some kind of professional help, I'd suggest trying it out before dismissing it. It sounds like your relationships aren't really a two-way street right now, and that isn't fair to your roommates.
I know that hang-ups can be very difficult to overcome--I still have some myself. And though it's far easier said than done, you're going to have to put in more effort and step further out of your comfort zone--not that you haven't been doing this already, but it's going to take a decent amount of work on your part.
I hope things get better. I'll be rooting for you.

>>380251
You must have forgot Korea and Japan exist when you made this post.

>>380249
Fucking spies.

Ok so I think I had a panic attack of some sort??? Arm wouldn't stop shaking and twitching (Still twitchy now) and had a hard time breathing as I cried. Took a shower and had to sit to hyperventilate a bit and cry. Can't completely calm down. Pretty sure my mom manipulated me into this by repeatedly saying she wanted to die/kill herself. All because she fought with my brother and sister earlier.

She did this before and I had a similar reaction though not as strong. Probably because she admitted she was just saying things. When I broke down crying to her tonight she said "Blame your sister and brother for this" and when I called my sister earlier before I really started freaking out she got on the line and asked if I was done yet so it made me hang up quick.

Now she keeps asking me to do stuff around the house and I can't stop from just.... agreeing to everything she says. I'm too afraid to sleep now in case something happens. I want to talk to my sister again but I'm afraid to. I think mom is trying to make me cut ties with her already but I can't do that. My sister is my support system and my best friend. I don't want to. I think I need some help somewhere but I have no insurance and don't want to go alone and I don't know. My arm is hurting now from all of the shaking and I feel sick. Getting real tempted to call a 24 hour hotline to talk to someone idk


tl;dr mental health bullshit idk why I wrote this here I think I just needed to get it out somewhere. Sorry folks

>>380294
>repeatedly saying she wanted to die/kill herself
CALL A SUICIDE HOTLINE
Seriously. Or the cops. Someone. ANYONE. Even if she really is "just saying things," there is no part of this that's ok. Threatening suicide to control someone is HARDCORE EMOTIONAL ABUSE and you should not feel bad at all for needing help or even just venting. If you can move out, do so ASAP.

>>380295

Yeah, she's just talking. We went through this before sometime after my dad died. I was so upset from what she was saying that I was getting ready to walk to my sister's house. She lives 5 miles away and it was like 2am or something but I needed someone. They called me back before I got far and then she said she was 'just upset'

I don't have a job or a car. The truck I use is inherited and is in my mom's name (Despite the fact that she can not drive) I think she assumes I'm going to live with her forever? I'm going to a community college right now with plans to transfer to a school where I can live on campus but that won't be for at least another semester. I put out some applications today for jobs because yeah, I want my own place. Living here is like soaking in poison.

Now that I'm calm I'm regretting not calling the cops. That could have probably helped now that I'm thinking and not in a blind panic.

>>380296
Regardless of whether she's "just talking," she's using it to manipulate you, and it's working.
Should really get out of that situation ASAP.

>>380296
"Just talking" is still abuse. Someone I loved once threatened suicide to control me, and for so long I convinced myself that it was my fault and "he didn't mean to hurt me." I have since cut him out of my life, and that did wonders for my psychological health. Even if she's your mom and you love her, she is NOT being your loved one when she's acting like this. It is NOT your fault. You are in a toxic situation. Call a hotline. Call the cops.

>>380296
Can you temporarily move in with your sister? You need to get out of there yesterday, Tekno. It's good that you're aware that what your mother's doing is wrong. That's the first step toward getting out.

>>380294
>my mom manipulated me into this by repeatedly saying she wanted to die/kill herself

GOOD GOD GET OUT OF THERE
I am so sorry. So, so sorry that this happened to you.

>>380300

My sister has major money problems as well as a rebellious teenage son with anger issues. While it wouldn't be as bad as being here, one time I did have to walk out of her house with food all over my hands because they started screaming at each other and I didn't have time to wash my hands. Went for a walk and when I came back he had yet another hole he punched into his wall and it was tense as fuck. Not sure if I could handle that 24/7. I could stay a night or two but right now I'm afraid of how my mom would react to that. Which... Is probably a problem.

She locked her door when she went to bed tonight and it has me on a razor edge. If I didn't hear her oxygen on I would probably be worse. I have tons of issues with sleep + death and this is playing right into it. I don't think I can trust most of my own judgements right now.

>>380303
>>380303
If you call an abuse hotline, they might be able to help you find emergency housing. I've never had to use one myself, and I don't know if you're male/female/something else, but I've heard they help people of all genders and situations. Please get help. Please try. This internet stranger is concerned about you. <3

>>380294
Speaking as one victim of emotional, financial and the whole rainbow of other forms of abuse (thankfully, none sexual) from their mother, I feel where you're coming from.
The only way to make the hurt less is to let your heart break for the person abusing you. They don't deserve your concern or love anymore. People who do that to you have already done the same to themselves on your behalf, which allows them to treat you the way they do, or never had one to begin with and were just really good at pretending. Squaring off with that reality and realizing they're just letting you stay around for the jollies of treating you this way will go a long way to easing that anxiety and hurt, but it doesn't make it go totally away.

You at least have limited mobility, and a truck, so that must also mean you have a drivers license and automotive insurance, and some manner of freedom to use it without having it completely yanked out from underneath you. She doesn't drive, which makes her dependent, which means she can't totally restrict you from leaving the house or having some mobility. You're in college, so that at least means you have at least a little financial freedom and time. If I were in your position, I would get a beer money job on the side of my schooling hours and put it away towards a car. Save up around 3000, buy a clunker that will get you from A to B for a year or two or put a downpayment on an ugly but reliable vehicle.

She knows exactly what she's doing. She is in control of her faculties, 100%. It's not hysterical 'I let that slip out, but it's an exception', that's the real her. It's when she's not doing that, that's the ruse. She knows what she's doing is poisoning your mind, she knows you're beholden to her psychologically, she knows you are in a practical bad place and that if she wanted, she could very easily hurt your future unless you obey, and she knows exactly how to kick your legs out from beneath you if you try and leave. This is all coercion, and it translates to, "YOU must be the one to opt to stay with me, and it must be done of YOUR own volition." It's a mental gymnastics game. Who is she trying to kid? Reality. In her mind, she's the good person. This is her trying to change things in her environment to at least give her a defensible excuse for seemingly benign or forgivable decisions that just coincidentally hinder you. Inconveniencing you, but making it look like your choice.

As soon as you reconcile with this, the damage she does to you inside will stop cutting so deep. You're lucky you have a considerable amount of slack to work with in escaping her, too.

>>380305
I'm female and I think I'm a little old for an abuse hotline? Idk I'll keep it in mind I guess. Thank you anon <3 You are a kind person.

>>380306

The only reason I get to go to school is because of financial aid. If it wasn't for that I wouldn't be able to go at all. I'm actually overdrawn at the moment with my bank and have no idea what to do about it but I have a little time to fix it. I don't have insurance at all I'm just on the policy that's in her name. I am trying to get a job atm and have actually planned out my fall semester so I only have classes Monday and Wednesday so if I get a job I can work the rest of the week. Hopefully. I just want to go a day without feeling like there's a vise squeezing my chest and getting out of here would be for the best.

As for the rest... I don't know. This sort of manipulation is new. I'm used to the guilt trips and passive aggressive comments. Not her winding me up to the point of hyperventilation and uncontrollable twitching for hours THEN after me begging for comfort blaming it on someone else. The other stuff I can deal with but what she did last night was far too much. She only got this bad after my dad died. He kept her crazy from everyone else. She's a bipolar manic depressive I think? My brother calls her light-switch because that's how her moods go sometimes . My brother also says I make too many excuses for her behavior and he's probably right. Without my dad she's really gone off the deep end and I think that's finally sinking in. She's my mom though and I love her despite this bullshit so all this is really fucking hard to deal with.

As soon as I get a job I think I'll be golden. I'll get less financial aid after I do but I'll burn that bridge when it comes. Have to actually get a job to worry about it lol. When the fall semester starts up I'll be eligible for work study too so fingers crossed if I don't have a job before then I can get one of those.


God I'm sorry for all this guys. Here's an adorable fawn to make up for it?

>>380252
>if you wish to respond with paranoia, choose trust.

I think I've all but lost that ability. There are some I trust more than others, but no one I trust completely anymore, even those I care about the most.

>>380307
>I think I'm a little old for an abuse hotline?
Why do you think that? I've met elderly people who were in need of and recieved that kind of support alongside me.
And I don't know if you'd want to, but suicide hotlines are another free resource that you can call if feeling overwhelmed or depressed--one doesn't have to be feeling suicidal to call and vent to someone. The helpfulness varies depending on the person on the other end, but sometimes just being able to vent to someone, anyone, can provide some degree of comfort.
Free support groups may also be available around where you live.
I don't know. Maybe I'm just telling you things you already know.
I wish you the best.

>>380311

Just meant that I feel a little old calling an abuse hotline because my mom is being horrible. I think I would feel like I was wasting their resources. Sorry. Haven't slept in 21 hours and I seem to have strained a muscle in my arm because of all the twitching from my hand/arm have been doing for 9 or so hours so I'm not at my best at responding. You are a wonderful anon though and ilu

>>380312
If you're concerned about "wasting people's time/resources," I think you can put those fears to rest--if you're having panic attacks and your anxiety is interfering with your ability to function, I definitely wouldn't dismiss these issues as trivial or "not important enough."
Even if they were less serious, I've known people to call up support hotlines just so they can blubber and cry to someone simply in order to vent.
Again, the helpfulness may vary, as the people on the other end often are not professionals. I'm not the same anon who suggested abuse hotlines, and I haven't called an abuse hotline, but I assume they work similarly to suicide hotlines. I don't utlize hotlines as a resource very often, but one time I got a guy who just listened to me and said "Uh, okay, I hope things work out for you man," and hung up. Another time I got someone much better who spoke to me for over an hour, so it's not always consistent or reliable, but still can provide some amount of comfort
And I don't know if it's a resource you'd want to utilize or would even find that helpful, but I'd hate for you to discount something under the belief that you're not worth someone's time, because that's not true at all.
Whatever you do, I wish you luck.

>>380314

I've never called a hotline before so I don't know either! It's certainly an option of course.


Mom came in earlier and said she would never leave me but she'd leave my siblings(???) and that she loves me and that it's just going to be us and that last night was the worst part and sdfjhdkjfhdugf IS THIS WHAT STOCKHOLM SYNDROME FEELS LIKE.

Also my brother told me not to be a drama queen because of my hand spasms/shaking even though I CAN'T FUCKING CONTROL IT because apparently it's linked to the stress idk this has never happened before. 100000% done with this family

>>380315
You realize she's using this situation to try and make her the most important figure and separate you from the people she has a personal problem with, right?
Don't let her do that. Even if you don't call any hotlines or try to get out ASAP or anything, understand that she is manipulating you, and don't let it happen, okay?

>>380315
>IS THIS WHAT STOCKHOLM SYNDROME FEELS LIKE
Probably. Please call someone or a hotline or something and GET HELP. It's not too late.

>>380307
I'm on Skype if you'd like to discuss anything. Believe me, I know firsthand the kind of headfuck you're going through. There's also absolutely 0 stigma in society for a girl calling a help hotline or visiting a shelter, at any age. Especially if they actually need it.

Also, you would be amazed the kinds of logic faults the body can do when you're stressed. As a kid I was driven to the point where my hair started falling out. As I grew up it started manifesting as digestive problems, from GERD to heartburn to unpleasant toilet oriented trouble. And it kind of stuck. The more time and mental energy I expend on feeling not!Bad, the more susceptible I am to stress twisting the knife in my guts and debilitating me with what amounts to food poisoning, missing appointments and deadlines and generally causing misery. It's why just moving out and living on the street like a boss isn't an option. One public attack, here'll come the ambulance by a good Samaratan, and my poverty stricken ass will owe the hospital 10K for the unnecessary ride. So suddenly sprouting a tendency to shake and twitch isn't too uncommon, just another way this damage goes from being mental to physical.

I feel a little like I'm being used but I'm pretty okay with it

>at wedding after party
>bizarrely, (unsurprisingly), it has turned into a basic collection of just me and my friends + 1 young lady that we've chilled with before but I never really talked to
>Fun evening
>Don't talk too much but talk a little, find out she's a writer, between jobs, likes lunch
>it's probably the alcohol but I swear she keeps shooting looks at me
>it's the alcohol
>you're misinterpreting
>Doesn't mean anything
>put that shit out of your head

>>380309
most important person to trust is yourself. even if you can't do everything right, you'll learn how to do things better as you do.

trusting others can be nearly impossible without that... without knowing how much you can give and still be safe.

>>380294
Same here. My mom used to use suicide and/or divorcing my dad and abandoning us as a bargaining chip, and now whenever people talk about suicide, or show signs of being even mildly annoyed at me, I dissolve into profuse apologies and/or flee from a situation. It takes forever for me to be comfortable in online games because I generally suck or have massive amounts of lag, and I can't really relax unless I have at least one friend on the server. If one of my online friends even mentions suicide, I get shaky and have a stomachache.

remember folks
at the end of the day
no matter what your good behavior has been
even if you signed a contract
no one
owes
you
anything

sometimes you just trust that they'll abide
other times the rules change and they stick to those
sometimes you get nothing
not even an ear.

ugh. now i know why nightwing had to fly his bird ass to chicago in the comics. there's nothing for him in gotham. just a lot of regrets and bad memories.

>>380341

The next two big behavior analysis conferences are in Chicago.

The one this November is about vidya.

>>380342
i'd love to meet you at a conference sometime.

i'd keep your identity safe. i kept a certain poster's info under my protection until the poster decided to go more public. important stuff, etc. i respect that.

Holy shit I woke up at 6am.... I went to sleep at 2:30pm. God damn that's a new record. Guess that's what happens when you stay awake for 26 hours riding on stress and caffeine. My hand has stopped twitching too for the most part. I'm really hoping it'll stop all together but it's already a lot better so yay.

>>380319

I've never really used Skype but I think I'd like that. It would be nice to have someone who knows exactly what I'm going through and who can't get back to my mom with anything I say to talk to. That's the reason I didn't even tell my siblings that my mom blamed them for her saying everything because I knew they'd confront her on it and I didn't want that. ):


Oh and everyone here? I love you guys. Everyone is awesome and should feel awesome.

>listening to kids argue with each other.
>their dad tells them to pipe down.
>"Dad, I'm just trolling, Tyler!"
>mfw they're probably 9 and 12.

>>380349
this is probably how russian mafia felt when people made a movie about it

Made a post and it showed up with a spoiler image thumbnail... I didn't even post an image. What the shit?

>>380342
>The one this November is about vidya.

Is this going to be an actual conference or is this going to be another blame party where they say video games turns kids in to mass killers?
Oh, how's the food at these conferences? I hope they have a nice spread for the money you have to spend.
Maybe a Doctor sleepover party where all the doctors get together to paint each others toe nails and tell scary stories.

ssssssooo my depression is back again

>>380359
<3

>>380360

>>380359
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2190863/Semen-good-womens-health-helps-fight-depression.html

>>380359
Join the club.
And I mean that to say you're not alone, and not to be dismissive.
Hope things get better.

A phrase attributed to Gandhi is (paraphrasing) "I like your Christ; I don't care much for your Christians." Though when I took some time to look up this phrases origins I found that it's not well referenced and disputed to be by him. I have a kind of opposite effect towards America right now: "I like your Americans; I don't care much for your America." I'm a 'murcan.

>>380362
>which scientists carried out via survey rather than through practical experiment
How pointless.

>>380364
On second thought, I don't like most Americans either, so forget the whole thing.

>>380364
>How pointless.
Yes but far more enjoyable for the scientists.

>>380356

>content

I'm actually not too sure. It'll be the first of its kind. I know most of the committee and they're very supportive of gamification and how virtual environments can be employed to change behavior in safer and more prosocial contexts, so I doubt there will be much (if any) lizardbrained naysaying. This will be an opportunity to demonstrate value for our field moving forward and out of our overspecialized niches. A lot is riding on this.

>food

It'll be hosted at the Chicaco Convention Center, so whatever Chicago has to offer is p much what you'll be eating. PS: food not covered in registration fees. What, you trying to save money? hahahaha you must be some chump graduate student who gets paid below minimum wage ahahahahahahahaahhaahah I bet you split your hotel rooms with like 5 other people ahahahahaahh oh god it hurts to live

>shenanigans

Fun fact: "symposium" is Greek for "to drink together." That's basically what goes on. You grind from like 6 in the morning til like 8 at night. You attend talks, conduct interviews, present your own research, go to meetings, participate in discussions, etc. until it's drinking tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiime then you die because you forgot to eat or drink water for four days.

>>380362
I just broke up with my bf, haven't had dick in a long long time and won't be seeing any until September probably. Telling me to slather myself in semen is just rubbing all that in, really.

No pun intended.

>>380363
Thanks duderoo. we are a rather trouble lot in here, aren't we. We ought to make some sort of chart and see how many mental health issues we collectively tick off, like the world's most tragic trading card game.

>>380373
i'd be low in number but high in intensity.
just like the lovers i've had...

ha.
ha.

kill me.

>30C heat during day
>93% humidity
>walls are dripping water from humidity
>the only breeze is when moving arms fast through air
>sweat turns all clothes see through
>keeps dripping on glasses and paper at work
Oh boy nighttime!
>29C heat during night
>same situation otherwise
Welp.

>>380373
>haven't had dick in a long long time
That can make a person pretty depressed, especially if not masturbating to take the edge off.

>>380372
Wait, I'm confused, what kind of job do you have? As a consultant for video games? Who do I have to blow to get that job?

Today is not a good day.
And I had a chance to get Snickers, but got bananas instead, because frozen bananas make protein shakes more palatable, and I ran out of bananas.
Those two things are unrelated.

>>380375

Behavior scientist. I'm looking to get into game design research.

I'll let you know as soon as I'm done blowing them.

11 hours at work.
>4 hours for training
>"See you at 4. You'll work until 10."
>Okay, but my ride doesn't leave until 11
>"Then you can work until 11"
>Finishing homework for class tomorrow.
Being an adult sucks.

>>380377
That reminds me. For those who are feeling down.

http://www.livestrong.com/article/535786-tryptophan-in-bananas-insomnia/

http://www.funtrivia.com/askft/Question96522.html

>>380373
>Like the world's most tragic trading card game.

I think we have a million dollar on or hands.

>>380344
We love you too, Tekno.

>>380372
Wrote a whole paper about gamification in a Psych class. Got an A. I'm in support of it too, for the most part-- I do hate sites that have progress bars and try to make me check out functions I don't have any intention to check out, though.

>>380390

That's the problem with technologies of behavior change. They work. How they're employed is totally up to the designer.

>>380384
>I think we have a million dollar idea on our hands.

I fucked up that sentence nicely.
This morning I had to bury a cat....found him by the window.
I must have missed the body several times due to junk in the way.
I knew the poor thing too. He was a good cat who I hoped died quickly.
I'm kicking myself for not finding him sooner.

>Go to bed feeling pretty good

>Wake up and find out that someone I know over internet lives pretty close by

>Get to know said person well

>Meet up with lots of great people for various social events down here

>Slowly start to realize mutual attraction

>Talk a bunch

>Cuddle a bunch

>Date a bunch

>Introduce to friends and everyone gets along swimmingly

>Months pass and we’re really getting to know each other

>Go to sleep next to her on some comfy beach chairs underneath a warm night sky

>Wake up and reach out for her

oh. thanks brain.

>We ought to make some sort of chart and see how many mental health issues we collectively tick off, like the world's most tragic trading card game.

I would probably do very well, but nobody would believe me because I don't have $10,000 lying around to get a psychiatrist to legitimately diagnose me with anything. It's so depressing.

I think the only one people would believe is narcissistic personality, because well... obviously. But if I claim to be schizoid, no, I'm just making stuff up to get attention because I'm a pathetic manchild. Thought so.

Grandma's in the hospital and might not make the night. Family is trying to figure out what we're doing and who might be making the trip from VA to NJ possibly tonight because they aren't sure how long she'll last.

Wow life you can stop being completely fucking horrible anytime soon now.

>>380401
it was me

>>380413
obviously

>>380409
Dammit, sorry to hear of also that.

>woman who had kind of a crush on me messages me...
>...after about three years of no communication on my part
>mfw

She's a nice girl, and I don't want to hurt her, but I suspect there's no nice way for me to let her down gently. She seems to have taken it rather personally; part of her message reads "if I pissed you off, I'm sorry".

For the record, I had a crush on her too... but only for a few months. I suspect that is not the case for her.

crying while listening to freebird on repeat for nearly an hour is this it is this how i die

>>380420
replace that with colin hay and you have my life.
it gets better. not just another track i mean.

>>380419
Dammit, I know both her feel and yours. At the same time.

>cousin's wedding over the weekend
>have fun make-out times with a guy for pretty much the first time ever
>mom freaks out because I didn't tell her about it
>because I'm still 10 years old apparently
>cousins keep giving me shit about it
>I don't even know what's going on anymore
>have dinner tonight with family
>everyone keeps asking about the guy whenever there's a pause in the conversation
>keep implying I slept with the guy at every possible chance
>oh god mom is totally going to start freaking out at me for no reason again
>"haha, let's talk about sex lol right anon"
>lose it, start yelling at them
>mfw

>>380442
Making out =/= having sex with. I've made out with several people I never had sex with. S'a big difference.

So the trial started off with a knock knock joke.

I wonder if 30 years from now we'll settle disputes in the Thunderdome.

>>380442
When you say I made out with a guy your mom and rest of family is hearing I had unprotected anal, oral and vaginal sex with a guy but am being shy and saying it was only making out. Oh also I might be pregnant and he might have AIDS.

Now you know not to mention love life to family. Even if it's not really love life.

>>380448
I never mentioned it to them but they found out anyway. That's why my mom freaked out--not because I told her I made out with a guy, but because I kept it to myself. She seriously told me something along the lines of "I know what you did and I'm okay with it but you really should tell me" which what the fuck, I told her it was my own business and she needed to deal with it. The point is I don't want to talk about it with my family which is why I raged so hard that they kept bringing it up. Some things are private and should stay that way.

>>380446
I know that, my cousin was saying that while messing with me, she just kept implying it and I freaked out at her. She felt really bad afterward but it was so obnoxious


Sorry guys I just really needed to rant somewhere

>>380452
>Sorry guys I just really needed to rant somewhere
Don't be sorry, this is the reason SYM exists.

>>380452
Oh that's even worse. The only possible answer out is to close your eyes and jump in completely.
>sit down with parents
>patiently explain to them
>"whatever you have heard, it didnt go beyond kissing"
And explain to them the guy is nice. Invite him over or casually have him pick you up or something.

The best way to a girls panties is through her parents, sleep with them and you're in.
~Zapp Brannigan

>Sorry
Oh don't be sorry, your rant distracts me from my shitty life, like a girlfriend that left me for some douche who wears popped collars, and oh god I'm so alone, why does my keyboard smell like bourbon.

>>380458
Your keyboard has a problem, get it to AA.

Ask a 14-drink ninja anythng

>>380461
will you marry me

>>380462

I don't support same sex marriage

but don't take that out of context I don't tihnk anyone should be getting married at all why does the state recognize or sanction any of this shit anymore

ok does anyone else want to marry me then

>>380465
*sigh*

OK

But it has to be in Vegas. And we both wear Elvis suits.

>>380463
as if i needed more reasons to like you
>>380465
obviously
>>380461
okay. i'm 2-marijuanas high and can't think of a good question, so let's roll with who are your favorite people on plus4chan?

>>380463
>why does the state recognize or sanction any of this shit anymore
Misguided attempt in the 1920s to produce more marriages and more children (higher pop) was to create tax, loan and banking privileges for married people.

Ever since then, marriage had to have a legal definition.

IMO we have enough people, it's time for government to just ignore the whole concept of marriage.

>>380461
What are you?

>>380465
Okay? What does marriage entail?

>>380469
an abundance of sex, food and good tv shows and a mutual obligation to help the other when ill/drunk/sad/generally in need. must be naked at least 70% of the time.

>>380470
what about 70% naked 100% of the time?

One day I will learn to not value myself based on what others think of me.
One day I will actually believe I have worth outside of how I make other people feel.
One day I won't abuse myself every time someone gets upset with me.
Doesn't look like that's happening today though.
At least I have the new Borderlands DLC to distract me from how shitty I am. Escapism, hoooo.

>>380471
well, the rule for my conquests/partners/spouses are simple: if you are in my room, you are naked. it's a rule i have and will enforce enthusiastically. considering ~70% of our time will be spent in my room, it just makes more sense.

>>380472
it's a continual process. there's no cliff to get over, no single plateau to get past.

and things can bring you back to square one.

you don't need to just learn how to trust yourself. most importantly, you need to learn how to pick yourself up after you stop.

i know. i'm struggling with the same thing right now. but it gets easier. like dr. manhattan reconstructing himself from particles.

and here's the doozy.
... no one can just tell you how much you're worth to help you because you need to do this on your own. a consensus can help, but you have to pick yourself up.

>>380467
pablo

>Hey. I know you have a life of your own and your work load is getting heavy, but I need you to look after your grandmother for the next 3 days so you'll only be able to use your computer for an hour between the time she goes to bed and when you have to go to bed for work.
I mean, I love her and all and normally I wouldn't mind, but what the hell are you doing that's so important?

that said i just had a gnarly tussle with some less than savory thoughts about how to stop living.... not sure which is worse, panic attacks or having to argue with yourself to stay alive.

>>380473
That's a good rule, nudity is great.
>>380474
Yeah, that doozy is a killer.
Made even worse by the fact that I don't even know if I want to. I mean, I sure don't want to feel like this, but at the same time, I've seen what happens when people go too far in the opposite direction, and frankly, I'd prefer to be a meek-ass doormat who derives his self-worth from making others happy than a self-worshipping egomaniac who doesn't care about others' opinions at all.
It's hard to even get started when you're afraid of what the end result might be.

>>380477
Keep your body breathing, Ferry-boo.
You gonna be okay?

>>380479
yeah. thoughts come and go in self-perpetuating cycles until something shifts the cycle to a different one or enough processing occurs until it moves on.

nature of thoughts, etc. recursive loops, etc. i'm fine. just had to pull myself out. like i said. gets easier. never fun.

>>380475
obviously

>>380446
>>380442
>>380448
Pretty much why my mom freaked out about me disappearing for a day to hang with my girlfriend.

I love my folks but I feel like most of the older American generations aren't as exposed to as much sex as the younger generations are, and they still titter like toddlers while you can be in the corner going "I have dick rot and my dick is going to fall off why are you giggling you horrific bastards"

It's like, how do I tell them that one of the most iconic figures I was aware of growing up was some guy who could widen his ass enough to fit a soccerball up it? And that it wasn't even a real interest, just shit people sprayed on the walls in Counter Strike Games?

>>380481
Well your kids will probably understand you, probably seen worse shit sprayed on walls of TF2.

>>380478
That's me. I've been in doormat territory for several years now.

I always avoided sex because I was worried I'd be guilt-tripped into it by some lonely person who just wanted a booty call. It killed my sex drive, and I miss it. Everything else, though. The second someone tells me I fucked up or upset them or screwed up again, I'm their bitch.