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  • 08/21/12 - Poll ended; /cod/ split off as a new board from /pco/.

File 136496020897.jpg - (123.79KB , 620x340 , kim-jong-un-generals-us-mainland-strikeplan-reveal.jpg )
375751 No. 375751
That wacky Russel is up to shenanigans over in North Korea, and unfortunately Doug and Carl aren't around to set him straight. So off we go with the will-they-won't-they tension and "i-i-it's not like we want to annex you" tsundere bullshit again.

Will Russel launch his magic missile in little miss Park's face, or is he just begging for food or some shit? Put your North Korean speculah here /baw/.
Expand all images
>> No. 375755
His hat is so wide.

It is wider than his head.

What do I have to do to get a hat as wide as his?
>> No. 375758
File 136497016310.jpg - (22.76KB , 480x384 , 486561_580273067357_1587238715_n[1].jpg )
375758
>>375755
Become President of Egypt, get honorary degree
>> No. 375760
you guys just letting you know that if shit goes down with North Korea i'm going to have to do my job

rip pablo
>> No. 375761
>>375760
they couldn't hit your boat by accident, ok?
>> No. 375765
>>375760
pablo I'm pretty sure anything at sea against North Korea is going to be like anything pitting abrams tanks against 2003-Iraqi tanks.
you'll be fine.

as for predictions:
North Korea is going to fall. Hopefully, HOPEFULLY, South Korea will go in there and clean house. I'm not even worried about the war side of things. North Korea has just been kicked into the corner by its government so long, there's just no squishy bits in there left to rupture. So long as we make pinpoint deadon balls accurate strikes, and I KNOW we're capable of that, removing their government should be a cinch. I'm concerned about what's going to happen to its people after the shit hits the fan. What is the actual process of transitioning from one government to another?

They're going to need canned food, water, and foreign investment. Especially if the South respects their continued existence as a separate country, at least for a time being.
>> No. 375767
>Especially if the South respects their continued existence as a separate country, at least for a time being.
The two Koreas each do not consider the other a separate country.

Also, Giant Bomb Goes To North Korea
http://rapidshare.com/files/3325399824/mc_drewkorea_042712_1500.mp4
>> No. 375783
North Korea missiles 'ready to…youtube thumb
>> No. 375786
>>375783
If he actually acts on his threats, he'll basically lose all his power.
I doubt the barking dog will bite.
>> No. 375791
>>375786
I really hope he does. I'd love to see this zit on the globe finally popped.
>> No. 375792
Iron Sky - North Korea Confessyoutube thumb
>> No. 375801
What's so frustrating is how the situation is so prone to stagnancy: this year will mark half a fucking century since the DMZ was marked and there's been little to no functional has change in terms of geography, politics, or military. The only significant difference is both the population and leadership of North Korea go progressively more insane as the only people who've actually seen war or the beforetime die, then their children, and so on.

We should have never expected Jong-Il's death to make anything better. Him succeeding Il-Sung already shown their government can get away with putting whoever the fuck they want in charge, because it's basically the only time what's supposed to be a communist country has chosen their leader like a monarchy with essentially zero political struggle thereof. And royal brats like Jong-Un only grow more spoiled and ignorant as generations pass.

>>375767
>The two Koreas each do not consider the other a separate country.

Yes, but by this point there's far more pride than practice on the South's part (the North of course is a non-issue because it will never happen). Even if given the choice of control over North Korea, I doubt South Korea would actually annex them any time soon because:
1. It's 25 million people--half their current population--who've they've been growing apart from in education, technology, and culture for fifty years. Even if the North Koreans don't hate the South as much as Americans, I can't imagine them being pleasant to work with.
2. It could make China a bigger threat to them than North Korea ever was. Avoiding a US ally sharing a border is the biggest reason China puts up with DPRK's bullshit, the other being that they want to deal with number 1 even less, thus why this insanity is any kind of sustainable.

>>375786
In all likelihood, it's just another attempt to look good to his people--which is so utterly unnecessary at this point that it's effectively just an ego-trip.
>> No. 375804
>>375801
>It could make China a bigger threat to them than North Korea ever was. Avoiding a US ally sharing a border is the biggest reason China puts up with DPRK's bullshit, the other being that they want to deal with number 1 even less, thus why this insanity is any kind of sustainable.
I don't know that I'd agree with that. I think that if the DPRK actually was retarded enough to attack the south, China'd throw them out with yesterday's garbage. China today has much more to gain from friendly relations with the West than it does from North Korean coal and such. If it came down to having to choose between keeping its border away from US allies or maintaining its nice foreign market share they'd pick the latter in a heartbeat. If China actually did back the DPRK militarily, it'd simultaneously find itself bereft of most of its export markets and in a fight with almost every other major international military power. And indeed while that may have appealed to Mao, the CCCP of today is far too practical to want that.

But it's highly unlikely it'll come to such a decision since Kim's probably just angling for food or something.
>> No. 375805
take a politics shit in the politics thread pls
>> No. 375810
>>375804
>I think that if the DPRK actually was retarded enough to attack the south, China'd throw them out with yesterday's garbage

I didn't mean China would actually attack for them, just that they would push for a North Korea with a new government over a unified Korea.
>> No. 375811
The more North Korea gears up for war, the more I think this may be the only way Jong Un has at getting his country the help it needs.
I base this theory on absolutely nothing whatsoever, but thinking about the sort of culture and dogma at play there, how Un was raised outside Pyongyang, how he may not even have that much ultimate information or control outside being able to do what's put in front of him and his attentions by supposed subordinates, it's possible the ruling elites want to keep things the way they are.

Instead of just sitting there talking about what he'd do if somebody invaded Best Korea, using charisma to justify continued rule, he's actually challenging and bringing this about to a head. Because once he lands the first punch and the guns start blazing, that'll be it. Nonconditional surrender, piecemeal dismantling of the military explosion by explosion, until there's nothing left but a military government with no military power to speak of. Then all the delusional ultra-loyalists can fight to the last man or self-destruct, as they will.

It will be interesting if Mr. Jong Un dies under mysterious cirumstances.
>> No. 375812
http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/world/north-korea-gives-final-approval-for-nuclear-attack-on-united-states/story-fnd134gw-1226612136732
welp
>> No. 375815
File 136510268075.png - (101.32KB , 640x502 , porkchop_sandwiches_by_kittybat1234-d3ckq7q.png )
375815
>>375812
>> No. 375823
>>375810
Eh, I'm sure they'd like that, but I think ultimately it'll come down to simply not being worth the fight. If NK goes down, the international community will not budge on reunification, and I don't think China cares enough at this point to pull hard for it.
>> No. 375827
>>375812
Is it wrong that I kind of want this? I just think humanity needs a good thinning, is all.

While its doubtful that anything they build could even hit the west coast (they'd get more by hitting Japan), even if it did they'd only take out a few million at most, and the retaliation in turn would completely wipe out the NK government.
>> No. 375830
>>375812
Now they just need to figure out how to get a nuclear weapon OVER here.

Seriously you guys, I know that International Diplomacy means that if they actually fired a nuke at us, it would mean war, but wouldn't it be funnier, more satisfying, and a far more effective way of reducing this idiot's power to just laugh in their faces every time they fail to nuke us? And when they finally build a rocket that DOESN'T just fall apart halfway to the US, casually shoot it out of the sky?
>> No. 375832
>>375830
That's probably the funniest thing to me about all this: even if they had a functional delivery system, they lack the necessary numbers to actually make a strike on the US that wouldn't just be tracked instantly and shot down in short order. And I'm fairly certain we've got that kind of interception tech in SK itself too.
>> No. 375843
>>375832
> And I'm fairly certain we've got that kind of interception tech in SK itself too.

The thing everyone talks about it Aegis (basically sonar tracking the missiles then having ships shoot them down their own anti-air missiles), which the South Korean navy does indeed use. The US is also setting up a land-based anti-missile system in Guam in response to >>375812 so they can move the anti-missile ships close to Korea, though they were planning to do that in a couple years anyway.

And like you said, basically the only way to get past them to is fire more missiles than can be matched.
>> No. 375844
File 136515633516.jpg - (527.82KB , 842x572 , england trying to start a war.jpg )
375844
Yesterday the revelation hit me. North Korea is controlled by a Civ A.I.
>> No. 375852
File 136517099138.jpg - (146.51KB , 1024x640 , EVERY GODDAMN TIME I PLAY.jpg )
375852
>>375844

MONTEZUMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
>> No. 375854
My teacher asked us last week if we were afraid of Kim Jong-Il, and I tried to say he was dead and that his son was in power, but he didn't seem to understand that.
>> No. 375865
>>375854
>all asians are the same
typical murriacan educator
>> No. 375870
File 136519578969.gif - (132.88KB , 200x200 , disniggaliekpopcorn.gif )
375870
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think North Korea's twitter and a few of its websites got hacked?

http://news.yahoo.com/nkoreas-twitter-account-hacked-amid-091726564.html

In other news, Guam couldn't give a damn about a threat to be bombed.
>> No. 375873
>>375870
Anons have been vandalizing the shit out NK's propaganda stuff yes.
>> No. 375885
there's literally no chance of anything from Best Korea reaching anywhere but their own soil.

the US Navy, Japan and the ROKies have such a dense anti missile screen, air superiority, intelligence network and assets so overwhelmingly more modern and powerful than what the norks can hurl, it's silly to think they can even get a missile to take bearing before turning into debri.

on the other hand, the Chinese will slap their shit themselves if they make anymore stupid moves anyways. They can't afford to have America -not- pay their debts, or worse, on their very borders.
>> No. 375886
It's just Kim Jong-Un huffing and puffing a lot to convice his staff of "loyal" generals that he's a strong leader who shouldn't be offed quite yet.
>> No. 375893
File 136521980227.png - (313.05KB , 599x467 , bamsek.png )
375893
>that feel when Squirrel and Hedgehog won't get a satirical South Korea spin after all this goes down
I'm a sad panda.
>> No. 375894
Daily Show had a North Korea special.
http://www.thedailyshow.com/full-episodes/fri-april-5-2013-
>> No. 375901
>>375885
[This is actually the case.]
>> No. 375902
>>375894
Thanks for pointing that out. My DVR missed that because it wasn't a regular episode.
>> No. 375905
>>375885
Oh, the North Koreans certainly can hit targets in South Korea. Remember this?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bombardment_of_Yeonpyeong

In any case, what makes you think that in the event of a war, the Chinese will side with the US against North Korea? They are allies, you know. I don't see what there is to stop China from quietly supplying North Korea with the tools of the trade and bleeding America slowly.
>> No. 375906
>>375905
>I don't see what there is to stop China from quietly supplying North Korea with the tools of the trade and bleeding America slowly.
The influx of Best Korea refugees across their borders and their economic stability.

Perhaps 50 years ago they would have been balls out about support NK in a war against SK/US, but they've gotten far more capitalist and complacent since then. Also, my understanding is that the Xenophobia commonly associated with Japan exists throughout the Asian world, including other Asian cultures (so Japan doesn't want Chinese immigrants as much as they don't want American ones, China doesn't want Japanese or Koreans, etc.)

IIRC, the debt they have is only about 8% of our total debt, and the majority of that in U.S. bonds (which have to be paid back after a certain amount of time), so us "defaulting" (which I'm not sure is even possible) isn't their biggest issue--their biggest issue is that if there were a U.S. moratorium on Chinese-made goods (or America were somehow hurt enough by such a war that their companies went out of business and closed all the shops), a decent chunk of their population would suddenly be without work, which might cause a worker's revolt.

There might also be a concern that if America goes tits-up in the war they'll just toss a nuke at NK, especially with NK's own "nukes" a threat to us. The possibility of this is infinitesimally small, but real, and the effects would certainly harm China as much as they'd harm South Korea.

That China supported sanctions against NK recently shows a changing wind. I think they're tired of the bullshit as well, but perhaps also worried that if Kim Jung-Un goes off his rocker and actually tries to fire a nuke at someone that it will be so horribly crafted that the targeting system will put it in China. (At least, I would be concerned about that if I were right across the border.)

Really, the world should just go "fuck this bullshit", get some SEAL Team 6 up in Pyongyang with a coalition of forces, capture Kim and the army heads, then call the whole country off. While you'd certainly have some retaliation along the border and possibly insurgents, I think the transition would be a lot smoother than Iraq/Afghanistan, especially if you establish NK as a country-state under joint SK/US oversight. The amount of country building in the area between SK, China, and Russia would be a huge boon. Establish a DMZ along the Chinese border to somewhat placate China's fears of a Western neighbor and call it a day.
>> No. 375908
>>375906
China already has a substantial Korean minority.

A few more million Koreans are a drop in a 1,200,000,000+ man ocean, how they would undermine China's economy you have yet to explain. If anything, they might benefit the economy slightly by providing some more pliant, cheap labour that China appears to be slowly running out of. I bet desperate North Korean workers aren't in the habit of going on strike.

As I can see, you have it all backwards - the real reason China ships back North Korean refugees to likely torture and death is because they threaten *North Korea*'s stability.

Rather than China wanting to keep North Korea afloat to prevent an influx of Koreans into China, China wants to keep North Koreans out to keep North Korea afloat.
>> No. 375917
>>375870
I think I'm more surprised that North Korea is connected to the internet.
>> No. 375918
>>375917
Same, but for different reasons. When they said it's an intranet, I figured they just connected a bunch of computers to a network that wasn't actually connected to the internet, but could interface to headquarters, which could interface with the internet. Like having a guided tour.

Given I've heard claims they actually managed to hack into this supposed intranet, maybe they just have a lolsophisticated version of Net Nanny.
>> No. 375920
File 136528314225.png - (884.66KB , 751x1387 , KoreaAtNight20121205_NASA.png )
375920
>>375918
It's hard to believe that many people even have access to a computer in that country, given that you generally need electricity for that sort of thing. Those that do are probably government employees, right?

I mean, who else would have internet? Public libraries in the city? Do they even have public libraries?
>> No. 375921
>>375920
Likely not.
I would imagine that internet and electricity is largely relegated to the upper-middle class and executive professional types. The folks who buy ski-dos and visit the amusement park. And have all the food they could want or need. A little slice of modernity that is then used to try and claim the rest of North Korea is exactly like that.
>> No. 375922
>>375908
>how they would undermine China's economy you have yet to explain.
Reread my post (or read the entire thing.) I wasn't saying that Best Korea refugees would cripple China's economy, I'm saying that a proxy war with the US using North Korea could cripple China's economy if the US actually suffered heavily from the war and affected a lot of corporations, who would pull their business out of China if/when they collapsed. Alternatively, if there's enough backlash from the public over Chinese goods once it comes out that China is supplying North Korea, a few companies will close up shop in China and move to the Philippines or something, also affecting China's economy.

It's a far-fetched possibility, but still a possibility. The flip side is that China would probably supply parts to both sides like we did to Germany and the Allies during early WWII (or was that WWI) until we could "prove" they were feeding arms to the North Korean army.
>> No. 375923
>>375920
That's a really telling image.
>> No. 376139
FUCKING NUKE US ALREADY YOU FAT FUCKING GOOK
STOP BLUEBALLING THE END AND DO IT
DO IT YOU FAGGOTY CUNT
FUCKING DO IT!!!!
>> No. 376140
His latest announcement was "the missiles are in upright, firing position."
>> No. 376141
>>376140
Go ahead and try it then.
>> No. 376144
>>376140
Pres. Obama: "That's what she said."
>> No. 376145
File 136572629624.gif - (1.98MB , 295x216 , VARYING DEGREEES OF REACTION.gif )
376145
>girls: the american public
>guy: the rest of the world

someone just do something already, dis gon b gud
>> No. 376146
File 136572703020.jpg - (84.77KB , 512x440 , oh ho.jpg )
376146
>>376145
>Americans
>Concerned at all.
If anything we just want the brat to shut up. The only ones afraid are the easily spooked types. Mothers mostly.
>> No. 376150
>>376145
Why the fuck would the American public be concerned about North Korea? They're stuck in the 19th century and probably don't even have the technology, resources, or morale to get to America by boat, much less via ICBM.
>> No. 376152
I'm torn between not wanting war (brief as it would be, Seoul would still probably be sacked) and wanting to see the last popping of a zit that has outstayed its welcome.

...Christ, imagine if we had internet in the 30s.
>> No. 376153
>>376152
>FDR is a faggot.
>> No. 376155
>>376140
>We're really gonna do it! We're going to totally do it this time!
>> No. 376167
>>376146
USA has huge interest in Korea and don't want it in trouble. without it, no more animation or online gaming industry, I can sadly already picture Time Warner lobbying like crazy to keep the place quiet
>> No. 376176
>>376150
I imagine a boat might be harder for them, just because a missile doesn't have an on-board crew to mismanage. And since it's bigger and slower, it'd be even easier to intercept.
>> No. 376201
File 136582211589.jpg - (128.27KB , 500x447 , a.jpg )
376201
>>376167
>huge interest in Korea
>animation
>gaming industry
>Time Warner lobbying

this post
>> No. 376230
>>376201
it's okay puppo.
it's okay.
anonymous has no power over you.
>> No. 376248
friendly reminder.
U.S. Army Successfully Tests Lightning Gunyoutube thumb
>> No. 376256
I'm not scared of North Korea, I'm scared FOR North Korea.

Un keeps up this bullshit until someone lets him have it and a lot of innocent people are gonna die.
>> No. 376257
>>376256
I'M MAKING THE MOTHER OF ALL OMELETS HERE, JACK.
CAN'T FUSS OVER EVERY EGG.
>> No. 376259
File 136595651952.png - (587.44KB , 500x707 , tumblr_mjgn3pr86z1qamb41o1_500.png )
376259
>>376257
Not when you're "Purging the weak," Right?

What do you know about "the weak?"

You weren't born poor. You've never been hungry.

You don't know what it's like to fight and kill just to survive!
>> No. 376264
>>376256
>a lot of innocent people are gonna die.
And you know what? It'll be worth it. Because those initial deaths will signal the end of this horseshit. No more of this cockamamie Appeasement 2013, we're talking execution for all military and political leaders followed by the state's dissolution.
>> No. 376265
File 136597262885.jpg - (92.17KB , 756x599 , IRA2.jpg )
376265
>>376264
>innocent deaths
>Worth it

Perhaps I am a blind idealist but I will never subscribe or condone that kind of ideology.
>> No. 376266
>>376265
Tiki the number of deaths caused by the military destruction of NK are nothing compared to the ones that will occur if it continues to exist as it does.
>> No. 376267
>>376265
>>376266
Are we seriously gonna have the Watchmen discussion? Again?
>> No. 376272
>>376267

>Are we seriously gonna have the Watchmen discussion? Again?

RORSCHACH WAS RIGHT
>> No. 376275
>>376272
He really was, though. They pretty much left the world in the hands of a genocidal maniac.
>> No. 376276
>>376264
>Because those initial deaths will signal the end of this horseshit.
Yeah, that's definitely how it's worked throughout history. Once you attack another sovereign country and kill a bunch of its civilians, they generally decide to let bygones be bygones and recognize how stupid the whole cycle of violence gets to be if each party keeps trying to get revenge on the other. Look how well it's worked for Israel and Palestine!
>> No. 376278
>>376275
Washington was completely abusing the fact that Manhattan gave them a blank cheque to completely fuck with the USSR.

Why else would we have that scene with Nixion shitting his pants when Manhattan left?

the point I'm getting at is that any of Videts Machinations past getting Manhatten out of the picture were purely bloody spectacle.
>> No. 376279
Oddly convenient change a' topics considering I'm re-reading the whole thing.
>> No. 376281
It occurs to me that in the world of nuclear allegorical kaiju, North Korea has the most limp wristed giant monster of any power.
>> No. 376287
>>376276
>North Korea
>Sovereign country
It's a Chinese puppet state which even the Chinese are sick of.
>> No. 376288
>>376276
Hence my comparison to the IRA and the Black and Tans for another example.
>> No. 376353
>>376287
Hardly relevant to the point, and even if it were it doesn't make North Korea not a sovereign country. Even if it did, Palestine isn't a sovereign country, and Israel killing Palestinians left and right hasn't made Palestine any less eager to kill Israelis.
>> No. 376362
>>376353
The Palestinians are actually armed and organized for armed resistance. North Korea's armaments and training is entirely for show.
>> No. 376403
File 136626915511.jpg - (192.58KB , 930x556 , JcsZj.jpg )
376403
>>376362
The fear isn't KPA regulars, it's their Special Operations elements which are of very great concern. Even then, the KPA represents a force of close to 9.5 million men and women.

To be honest, the real concern should lie with South Korean population centers. With a nation of individuals drilled into obedience, to worship the state in lieu of a God, making the state the religion, even their piss poor regulars will (initially) be some of the toughest sons of bitches you could ever want to uproot. Tactically, in the even of escalation, they're not going to waste their time targeting ROK/US positions immediately. They'll target population centers and seek to sew as much discord as they possibly can within the civilians. Once everyone is distracted by that, then they would try to over run the 38th. Their hope would be to ride the civilian rioting and up rest caused by their initial airborne strikes on the most densely populated areas, leaving the ROK and US/Allies having to deal with both them and the chaos. It wouldn't take much, either. They'll load down all of their combat aircraft save for their MiG-23s and MiG-29s with max gross worth of air-to-ground munitions, organize armor at the border and have them wait until the strikes are complete. Admittedly, it's pretty much a suicide mission for the aerial elements. No doubt ROKAF and USAF have regular patrols as of late and since both sides are going to be utilizing AIM-120Ds. This still gives Allied forces at least a 15 mile advantage over the KPAF. However, this is assuming that the KPAF is using the R-27EP and not one of the older ones with restricted range.

They also possess about 87 MD500s, a helicopter that the South also operates. I wouldn't place it beyond the realm of reality for them to paint up theirs in South Korean markings.

Their armor will pose the greatest threat simply because of how many they can field. They easily have 5,000 MBTs.

That's their only real viable strategy that I can come up with, and it's still impossible odds, pretty much.
>> No. 376408
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2013/apr/18/north-korea-conditions-us-talks
>> No. 376409
>>376408
At least they aren't demanding Michael Jordan anymore.
>> No. 376436
File 136636286575.jpg - (67.17KB , 960x718 , 69062_164153527082409_2003294640_n.jpg )
376436
This image says more than a thousand words.
>> No. 376440
>>376436
North Korea's government, not many of its people.
>> No. 376736
SK's now saying that they will undertake "grave measures" if North Korea refuses to talk about the joint factories.
>> No. 376929
File 136726438396.jpg - (11.24KB , 332x221 , distress.jpg )
376929
>Brother heading off to Seoul in a month
I know there's probably nothing to worry about but I can't help but being a little concerned when my only little brother is hanging out 25 miles from earth's problem child
>> No. 377247
>>376929
I know how you feel.
My father just left for Seoul to visit his mother and the rest of our family.
>> No. 377308
>>376440
I want to help. But I have no idea how.
>> No. 377732
Aaaand the potential pandemic alarm has sounded.
>> No. 377738
>>377732
The one in the Middle-East and Europe?
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